hopeytg Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 Am I the only Manager who has had enough? I am totally fed up with parents constantly moaning and complaining about things we do do or don't do. I try to make all my letters as simple as possible, explaining things as clear as I can but some of them just don't seem capable of understanding the most simple of things. This morning was just the 'straw that has broken the camel's back' - a parent wanting to make an official complaint because I didn't put her son's gloves on when we went outside! Am I being unreasonable or am I in the wrong? I used to love my job but I have applied for another one tonight doing something different, not sure I would actually take the plunge but I feel more positive just knowing there may be an alternative. Not sure how my staff will feel but I just know I can't on like this. Sorry just needed to vent x Quote
Mouseketeer Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 No you're not hopeytg apart from agreeing with your comments I've just been reading the EYPP thread, thinking 'I wonder if It can be used to pay the managers/leaders who are grossly underpaid a bit more for the extra paperwork (on top of all the extra paperwork that gets piled on us due to one or the other new initiative) this will now entail ... feeling overwhelmed :blink: :angry: 4 Quote
chez29 Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 I have many days like this, especially when I get phone calls at 2pm in the afternoon wanting data for 4 pm. When I'm in numbers all day and can't get to the office. I have so much paperwork I miss having time to be in room to support staff and interact with children. I fully know how you feel. 2 Quote
diesel10 Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 We only allow mittens. Unless of course a child can put gloves on themselves. 1 Quote
Rafa Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 We only allow mittens. Unless of course a child can put gloves on themselves. Ha ha! This made me laugh........ 1 Quote
larnielass Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 Well at least the Parent sent gloves in! I'm lucky if children wear long sleeves, bring boots or thick coats. I think there must be a micro climate on some of the local estates. And don't get me started on bags!!! No spare nappies, spare clothes. Old newsletter (unread) Today we have had a Parent complain about her child having wet socks..... We had run out of spares and naturally Mum didn't think to put any in the bag. That's my fault, apparently! 2 Quote
Mouseketeer Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 give her a ring next time, saying "as you've forgotten to put spare socks in, could you just pop along with a pair" 1 Quote
Panders Posted February 3, 2015 Posted February 3, 2015 Well at least the Parent sent gloves in! I'm lucky if children wear long sleeves, bring boots or thick coats. I think there must be a micro climate on some of the local estates. And don't get me started on bags!!! No spare nappies, spare clothes. Old newsletter (unread) Today we have had a Parent complain about her child having wet socks..... We had run out of spares and naturally Mum didn't think to put any in the bag. That's my fault, apparently! You know, I think sometimes parents are rather like children still - the more you do for them, we stop them think for themselves and for their child; by being totally responsible and having spares at pre-school they just become reliant on that and think "oh it'll be alright, larnilass will provide! We start off with the best of intentions in providing for the "odd" time and end up supplying spares for most things because we feel we can't trust the parents to remember - maybe it's time we stopped mollycoddling our parents. jNobody wants to see any child wet, distressed, dirty - but unless the parents know that you strictly don't provide they wont think for themselves - it's comes down to finding a way to make them understand their parental responsibilities, and I think by telephoning them every time their child needs something might just well work. 7 Quote
narnia Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 No you're not hopeytg apart from agreeing with your comments I've just been reading the EYPP thread, thinking 'I wonder if It can be used to pay the managers/leaders who are grossly underpaid a bit more for the extra paperwork (on top of all the extra paperwork that gets piled on us due to one or the other new initiative) this will now entail ... feeling overwhelmed :blink: :angry: In my letter telling me I will no longer be getting Graduate leader money, it said that some of EYPP CAN be used this way. I am going to a meeting about it next month, so it will be interesting to hear what they have to say 1 Quote
Fredbear Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 No your not alone. I often feel that I let the setting down by the constant workload to plough through. In fact I have been taking an internal audit of our provision as a whole in the last couple of weeks, including staff engagement, enjoyment for children, sharing the tasks, teamwork etc. This has been quite interesting and enlightening. My findings will be shared at our next inset day, to enable us to move forward in a positive way. We are also constantly reminding parents of the most obvious things to us, such as change of clothes in bag, naming everything grrrrr, helping children to help themselves by dressing, undressing etc. With the child with the gloves, if they are old enough, parents also need to teach children that when it's cold they need to remember to put them on, not just the provision. Out of interest how do they know they didn't wear them ?. 3 Quote
Mouseketeer Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 (edited) Will be interesting to know what you find out narnia, though I guess I should put in some effort to finding out myself... Point 600 on to do list: research EYPP Last week a parent handed me another pair of trousers saying "please put these on him if he goes outside" ..he'd just walked 20 mins to nursery without the need for them on, as I smile nicely saying I'll pass the message on, the thought bubble in my head is saying "do you think we're going through the bl**dy wardrobe" ? Edited February 4, 2015 by Mouseketeer 2 Quote
lashes2508 Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Hopeytg not your not alone , we have all been there or will be at some time. In our recent inspection going through the evaluation schedule - one of the indicators was full engagement of parents - I said you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink! There will always be those who support you and their children and those who won't , they are usually the most demanding ones. We have had a run of mislaid clothing especially on our pe days , I get so fed up so I wrote a piece on our Fb page stating clearly the need to label and that we cannot be held responsible for mislaid items . I said ' please don't take offence and take a pen and label your child's clothes ' I add links for glove clips so they are attached to coats and even award parents pasta points just like we do for the children. Parent questionnaires are use ful and I hound until they are returned . One of our parents ( committee) suggested a FAQ sheet , we said yes happy for her to do it as she would know what to put as she is always asking and was very demanding in the early days. 3 Quote
zigzag Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 I have worked in early years settings for the last twenty two years and in my present position for the last twelve years. During the last twelve years I have dedicated myself to my setting because I love the job and the children and could never imagine doing anything else. I am however now considering giving it all up. Since my deputy retired in July I am doing literally EVERYTHING and seem to be chasing my tail constantly. I have no idea why parenting seems to have changed so dramatically in the last twelve years and find it increasingly difficult to deal with this. In fact I felt compelled to send an email to all parents last Friday with a gentle reminder about manners and common courtesy. This was after only one parent out of fifteen said goodbye and thank you after session on Friday. Have had polite parents since, but so sad that I had to do that. It seems that the moments that make the job worthwhile and enjoyable are few and far between. 4 Quote
thumperrabbit Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Hopeytg not your not alone , we have all been there or will be at some time. In our recent inspection going through the evaluation schedule - one of the indicators was full engagement of parents - I said you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink! And what was the inspectors response to this ??!! Quote
Guest Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 give her a ring next time, saying "as you've forgotten to put spare socks in, could you just pop along with a pair" we've done this! It really does work ;-) Quote
sunnyday Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Will be interesting to know what you find out narnia, though I guess I should put in some effort to finding out myself... Point 600 on to do list: research EYPP I had exactly the same thought Mousie! 1 Quote
hopeytg Posted February 4, 2015 Author Posted February 4, 2015 Thanks folks, parent turned up early to pick up, another 2 minutes we would have been inside and she would have been non the wiser! Having a meeting with her tomorrow, I must admit I am getting to the point of saying to parents who constantly moan that perhaps another would setting suit them better? I totally agree with the comments about spare clothes etc, I am very tempted to remove our spares box and ring parents but there again some would still ignore me. I have been nagging for weeks about reverse parking as we have some building work on site but they still insist on driving in an we had a near miss this morning when a parent wasn't watching their child and another parent reversed out of her space. Feel better knowing I am not alone but its wrong we are feeling like this x 2 Quote
SazzJ Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 No I am throwing in the towel myself. After 6 years I can't do it anymore. Not even the parents to blame but my co manager Quote
diesel10 Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 I put notes in news letters and on the whiteboard outside to remind parents. Most wear mittens now. Although it does amaze me that children can arrive in body warmers / crocs and it -4. Quote
Fredbear Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Oh SazzJ I am sorry to hear that. Are you carrying on in Early Years, or something completely different. Wishing you good luck in whatever you do. Quote
SazzJ Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Fredbear I am expecting my 2nd child end of July so Will use my maternity leave to decide what path to take. I love early years but undecided what to do next. Considering assessor or teaching I think Quote
Fredbear Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Ooh good luck with your baby, and whatever you decide on your next career path. 1 Quote
tish501 Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 I put notes in news letters and on the whiteboard outside to remind parents. Most wear mittens now. Although it does amaze me that children can arrive in body warmers / crocs and it -4. Same problem with us.....no coat somedays,so we scurry around for a spare one so as not to have the child left out,,,its not his fault he has an inadequate mother. Quote
zigzag Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 Some of the thin jackets that children are coming to school in are unbelievable, especially when the parents are wrapped up in a great big thick winter coat!! SazzJ good luck with baby number two. Hopeytg you seemed to have opened a can of worms, it seems that a lot of us managers are feeling the same!! Just wondering if their are any truly happy managers out there who are 100% happy with work? Speak up and let us hear a positive side!! 1 Quote
louby loo Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 (edited) Hopeytg you seemed to have opened a can of worms, it seems that a lot of us managers are feeling the same!! Just wondering if their are any truly happy managers out there who are 100% happy with work? Speak up and let us hear a positive side!! I have to admit I currently fall into the 'unhappy zone' I used to love my job so much..... :mellow: Edited February 4, 2015 by louby loo Quote
Wildflowers Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 A positive for me was that, when I had enough over a chaotic lunch and asked the children if they thought it would be best to close the place, they said they want it to continue. I was touched by the sudden attention I felt and asked them to help to make it work. 1 Quote
Fredbear Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 On a more personal note, I had the most beautiful drawing of myself and our Administrator from one of our little ones brought in from home. With the words written by them and I quote " I love school ". Quote
louby loo Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 (edited) If I just had the children to worry about I'd be more than happy.. :1b :1b :1b It's the ever changing goal posts, lack of decent funding/support with SEND, Endless unpaid meetings (because we need to go for the wellbeing of the child ) Ofsted - not so much that they come, obviously we need to be regulated - it's just the whole experience depends on the mood/feelings/expectations of one person that may or may not actually be any good at their job anyway. :angry: :angry: :angry: Rant over. xx Edited February 4, 2015 by louby loo 1 Quote
SazzJ Posted February 4, 2015 Posted February 4, 2015 I love the job. Love the kids and parents but no longer feel the setting I am in is right now. I have spent the last two days doubting and questioning my own abilities. Despite being co manager my opinions and ideas count for nothing. Co manager is a strong character I am not but the setting has lost site of what I wanted to achieve because it's not what matters to her. It's with a heavy heart and endless tears I am saying good bye Give me my committee back any day Quote
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