Cait Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I have a little girl aged 3 who regularly interjects "Oh my God!" or "Oh for God's sake" at quite regular intervals. Now, I'm uncomfortable with this, I don't think it's appropriate, and I know I wouldn't have been happy if my children came home from Preschool saying it. I have told her that we don't say that at Preschool and suggested some other things she could use instead (one of the other children even pointed out that she could say 'oh my goodness' independently) Now is it just me? Am I being a fuddy-duddy? I don't like to hear adults saying this, but a 3 year old!!!! Obviously it's something she hears on a regular basis, so I can't really say it's 'not a nice thing to say'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finleysmaid Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 have to say i feel the same...and im not that religious but i do feel it might upset others. I also don't like bum and fa*t (see i can't even write it for fear of upsetting my mother!! ) well i guess im in the fuddy duddy club too! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I cant say it bothers me at all. I dont believe in god, so it doesnt have the impact it might on others. I have some extra religious family and I would be careful of what I said in front of them though. There are always going to be some words that arent completely acceptable by all sectors but language changes and so too do peoples opinions on a word. If you dont like it in your setting, you're quite right to stop it though. Its better than the little lad we had many years ago who used to wait for mat time to shout F, W, C, SH, B, over and over, your mother would have blushed finleysmaid Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finleysmaid Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Its better than the little lad we had many years ago who used to wait for mat time to shout F, W, C, SH, B, over and over, your mother would have blushed finleysmaid I am of course so innocent i have no idea what you mean rea! :blink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Good girl, I was corrupted many years ago,so you stick at it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JacquieL Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 How difficult as this child is only copying what she hears at home, the same as young children who swear! She will not understand that this is offensive, but like you Cait I would really find this difficult to listen to and wish to provide alternatives. I think It might be best not to pay too much attention to her, say that you don't really like her to speak like that and avoid eye contact as you are saying this, and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyfs1966 Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 When we hear this kind of thing we just try to model an alternative, such as goodness gracious me! or oh dearie doo, generally in a rather silly accent, and I find that the the children tend to copy what we say instead of the previous option. As an aside, one parent told me she asked her child to do something that she didn't wish to do, only to recieve the reply ( in a rather twee accent) "I don't think so...infact absolutely not!". Another example of copying what she hears..we try so hard to not use the NO! command. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Oh dear I have encountered this too and have said quite firmly "please don't say that, you can say oh my word" - have to say it worked.......... I would if needs be speak to his parents - I might have to duck now to dodge the bullets but in my book this is not appropriate........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I would speak to the parents if you are going to challenge this language as the poor little thing will be getting mixed messages if she is allowed to say it at home. However it could be worse, on tuesday one of my staff was saying goodbye to a 3 year old child 'bye Callum, see you next time' to which he replied 'bye s**t for brains'. Mum was mortified to say the least and we all managed to tactfully ignore him. Having heard this and much worse I'm afraid I have several children who I wish would say 'for gods sake' etc instead of what they do actually say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fredbear Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 We had a little one this week that took all the dollies off the chairs in the role-play area, picking them up one by one and saying c...p, c...p, a skilled practitioner intervened by saying that they didn't think that was a nice thing to say or to throw the dollies onto the floor. Have to say there are quite a few words that i find personally uncomfortable to hear and you can call me a "fuddy duddy" too if you like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I would speak to the parents if you are going to challenge this language as the poor little thing will be getting mixed messages if she is allowed to say it at home. However it could be worse, on tuesday one of my staff was saying goodbye to a 3 year old child 'bye Callum, see you next time' to which he replied 'bye s**t for brains'. Mum was mortified to say the least and we all managed to tactfully ignore him. Having heard this and much worse I'm afraid I have several children who I wish would say 'for gods sake' etc instead of what they do actually say. NO oh my goodness - mum needs to be mortified Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyPancakes Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 (edited) My Goodness! It's against the THIRD commandment - not somewhere down at number nine or ten. If you had children running around shouting words blasphemous to any other religion you'd crack down on it sharpish. It's not being a fuddy duddy, it's just respectful and not too many decades away from being punishable offences. There endeth the sermon. (I had one very high church parent and one Brethren one so had it beaten into me from all angles.) Honey Edited September 28, 2012 by HoneyPancakes 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panders Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I would speak to the parents if you are going to challenge this language as the poor little thing will be getting mixed messages if she is allowed to say it at home. However it could be worse, on tuesday one of my staff was saying goodbye to a 3 year old child 'bye Callum, see you next time' to which he replied 'bye s**t for brains'. Mum was mortified to say the least and we all managed to tactfully ignore him. Having heard this and much worse I'm afraid I have several children who I wish would say 'for gods sake' etc instead of what they do actually say. Strange term of endearment! I believe we have been blessed by our families and it has been a very long time since we have had to deal with any type of swearing. It wouldn't sit comfortably with me if a child constantly used OMG, but it is a fact of life these days that the children will hear it more often than not. I'm not so sure if it would really confuse a child, many children accept the rules at their grandparents homes are different from their own, they just get to know what is and is not acceptable in different situations - surely that is also part of the EYFS that they learn to stop themselves from doing something they shouldn't do, or accept the boundaries and expectations of their setting. I think you are within your rights to keep explaining everytime that you don't use this expression at pre-school until she gets the idea. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jo A Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Doesnt "my goodness" come from "my god" or am I dreaming this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cait Posted September 28, 2012 Author Share Posted September 28, 2012 It's possibly the same route, yes, but it doesn't seem so hard, does it 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mps09 Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 as we are talking about the subject I guess it is OK for me to type OMG - as this is a phrase 'banned' on many many websites/forums, including the Open University..... it is not considered police etiquette, and therefore I think you are quite within your rights to ask the child not to use that phrase in the setting..... Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HoneyPancakes Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Doesnt "my goodness" come from "my god" or am I dreaming this? Quite a lot of common exclamations are thinly veiled ways of avoiding breaking the Third. 'For crying out loud', 'gee whizz', 'Struth' Gosh, most of these were frowned upon by my mother. h Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cait Posted September 28, 2012 Author Share Posted September 28, 2012 'Blimey' is another (God blind me) apparently 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I have a little girl aged 3 who regularly interjects "Oh my God!" or "Oh for God's sake" at quite regular intervals. Now, I'm uncomfortable with this, I don't think it's appropriate, and I know I wouldn't have been happy if my children came home from Preschool saying it. I have told her that we don't say that at Preschool and suggested some other things she could use instead (one of the other children even pointed out that she could say 'oh my goodness' independently) Now is it just me? Am I being a fuddy-duddy? I don't like to hear adults saying this, but a 3 year old!!!! Obviously it's something she hears on a regular basis, so I can't really say it's 'not a nice thing to say'. I don't like it either, particularly as I take and collect children from both the local Catholic and C of E primary schools and feel it wouldn't be particularly well received on the playground :huh: If I do hear it I gently correct them to Oh my gosh or, our favourite, Oh Flip (after Flip the Clown taught the children to shout this out whenever he dropped a club as he was juggling) My 17 year old daughter still says 'Oh Flip' in moments of stress and it cracks her friends up in Sixth Form B) Nona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TinklePrincess Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 I have to agree, I find it uncomfortable. Even more so, it makes me feel physically sick when I hear anyone blaspheme like that. I have led a Brownie unit for many years and I always told my girls that it's not a nice thing to say and they always heard me say "oh my word" or "oh, dear me". I think they learn more from modelling that which others say. Maybe this isn't very PC for me to say and I apologise if it seems narrow-minded, it's not intended that way... I can't help but think that if a child (or anyone else for that matter) were using another religions' God's name in vain, it would be a lot more of an issue. Could even be construed as a hate crime in some scenarios. I am passionate about this topic so I apologise and I'll get off my soapbox in a moment! But as a Christian nation, Christians and their beliefs are so often disrespected and I find that there is much more respect and reverence for other religions (in fear of offending, perhaps?) I say nip it in the bud early and help to raise awareness that yes, it is important to respect each others' beliefs, even if they're not our own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted September 28, 2012 Share Posted September 28, 2012 Not narrow minded at all. I think we allow more harm by not being open about things. I personally find actions more offensive than words but everyone is entitled to their opinions 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted October 2, 2012 Share Posted October 2, 2012 Just on a lighter note have you ever had the poor child who has used a swear word completely innocently without realising what they have done and you as a practitioner have had to keep a straight face and show no reaction....little boys finding words that rhyme with duck and truck comes to mind 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted October 2, 2012 Share Posted October 2, 2012 I once had a little lad tell me 'boll**ks*s is a naughty word'. I had to agree, but only just managed to keep \a straight face. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 2, 2012 Share Posted October 2, 2012 Hmmm, difficult one. like others have said, it is what the children are hearing at home and are therefore just copying....my daughter has come home saying it from her dad's, i personally dont like it so we have the agreement she can say at her dads (she is 6) and not with me...it seems to work at the moment. i guess i would try the same at work, maybe saying that some people dont think it is nice and maybe only say it where they have picked it up from...although i think the children may be too young to understand this....depending on your relationship with the parents i guess my next step would maybe to speak to them....i suppose it all depend on what you as staff think and if you are fine with children saying it or not.... Lou. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 2, 2012 Share Posted October 2, 2012 I would discourage it in the setting but, personally, the phrase itself does not bother me too much - certainly heard much, much worse from the mouths of babes.... It will vary greatly from family to family whether it is acceptable or not. I recently had a parent express concern that her son was saying the word 'Fart'. She actually spelt it out to me as she was so uncomfortable with it but in another family the word is normal. We discouraged it in the setting but boys will most certainly be boys and it was said quite often in free play along with boobies, bum and poo..... She would have died if she had heard what came out of the mouth of one of our 3 year olds last week - a word that not even my husband says out loud!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Froglet Posted October 2, 2012 Share Posted October 2, 2012 It would bother me, partly from a personal point of view but also because we're a church school, several of our families are regular church goers and would find it offensive. I think it's all about respecting other cultures. I think that children would have less of an issue with saying different things in different contexts. I grew up being called 'Nell' by my mum. No one else ever used it and for me it became so much 'mum's name' for me that to hear it from anyone else felt weird. As an adult I'm not someone who swears a lot but I know that even under moments of stress I wouldn't risk it at school in the middle of the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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