Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Thinking of you today and hoping this mess gets resolved at your meeting and a heartfelt apology is given to you buy both the parents and the nursery management..... seems so sad that common sense hasn't led to the cctv footage being shown to the parents either when they first spoke to the manager, when the management viewed the cctv or again when the parents expressed doubts about what their child had said.... Nona Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 (edited) UPDATE First and foremost thank you to each and everyone of you that has offered me advice, support and encouragment. I had my meeting this morning and on the whole it went well. we danced around the houses a bit before getting to the allegation..... which was : a child who is very nearly four told his parent that i had hit him and shouted 'oh dear' at him because he ran away from the table with a toy at snacktime. The child alleged that he was upset. Now cctv clearly did not show this happening. I did not do it. it was pretty much that clear cut. CCTV backed me up. The owner asked questions such as: how was my mood on the day (my mood was fine, its a busy day, it can be stresful but had i have felt stressed i would have voiced that and asked for help). could i describe what happened at snack time on the day (as far as i could recall snacktime was uneventful) would i have said 'oh dear' to the child (i probably would have said this if he was not sitting down at the table, he is old enough now to know the routine) did i make any physical contact with the child (i said that i could not remember, i know i did not make neagative physical contact with the child but i could not guarantee that i had not touched the child to sit him down etc) did the child get up from the table (i could not recall this happening) The owner said there and then that the allegation was clearly unfounded and she was going to let the parent know and the LADO and Ofsted the staff in the room at the time showed that nothing had happened too. the owner said that i was really the 'victim' in all this, she asked me how i felt and i told her that i felt vulnerable and was skeptical of working with this child again, but i would since it is my job. i have asked not to do 1-1 with him ie taking to bathroom, moving around nursery etc.... places where no cctv is in site.and for the time being for the other staff to discipline him / deal with unwanted behaviour since he clearly was capable of making a false allegation. I think going forward we need to watch out for all staff where this child is concerned and as much as possible make sure we safeguard ourselves (he is a clever child, and i hate to say it but very manipulative too). he is also a term time only child so leaves end of July, This makes me feel better about seeing my maternity leave out and going at the planned 32 weeks (10 more weeks to go!) in retrospect i feel that this process could have been solved sooner, but equally it has highlighted a few things: 1) How manipulative this particular child can actually be 2) we are never 100 % safeguarded, but by god CCTV has been a life saver in this instance. 3) procedures are a pain in the arse sometimes and it has caused me stress but now i can see the procedure has actually safeguarded the nursery and me and i am greatful for that. what did come out of the meeting was that the children listen to me more than other staff and i need to work hard to change this especially with me going on leave in 10 weeks ( i think as a room leader i have effectivley lead the room and the children but someone needs to start taking over so that the children respond equally to all staff) the owner is very pleased with my work and she is so glad that this did not happen say six weeks later when i could have easily just left on maternity leave without giving it an opportunity to see how i felt returning to work. I am glad of this too, since now i know i need to find the confidence i know i have. i have worked 13 years in childcare and never had an allegation made against me..... this was an unfounded allegation.... i need to be confident in my work and returning to work tommorow will help this. It may also mean the difference between me returning or not returning after maternity leave (i do want to return now) also the allegation will not go on my file as it was proven unfounded by cctv, this is a relief. thanks for all your support Dawn Edited June 11, 2012 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Great news Dawn ! - what about your 'holiday', will you be able to 'keep the days used' or be paid for the time you would officially have been suspended ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 :1b I am absolutely delighted for you Dawn..... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 No mention of re-imbursement of holiday, but i guess i am being paid for today off (which the meeting finished at 10:30) so kind of a days holiday, sort of LOL. To be honest i am not fussed anymore. I have a short week (tue and wed normal 8 hour shifts and thursday i am doing 7:30 - 12 and then training in the afternoon which finishes at 3:30 and is round the corner from my house. ) I also have some time back to use so i can maybe take half a day next week or something? Great news Dawn ! - what about your 'holiday', will you be able to 'keep the days used' or be paid for the time you would officially have been suspended ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForestFlo Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Oh thats such great news Kxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fredbear Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Fantastic news Dawn and such a relief I'm sure, now concentrate on yourself and your imminent family, take care Fx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klc106 Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Glad it all got sorted for you :1b Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
louby loo Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Phew........... good that's it's over. And with the positive result that could/should have been sorted the same or next day! What is does do is the highlight to everyone just how vulnerable we all really are. Only this morning I thought of you as I 'repositioned' a child for their father's day card photo.............. as I moved him I though ' how does this actually look from an 'outside point of view'? Sad but we all need to think all the time about these things........ it's such a sad way for the world to go. I would say 'have a glass of wine and relax'...... but maybe not in your 'condition' ::1a 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Sooo pleased it is all over for you....what a wretched time it has been. Feet up with a cuppa I think Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Glad to hear that you have had a happy outcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Very glad to hear everything is sorted Dawn. ::1a Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cait Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 What a relief, I bet you feel a cloud has been lifted! I've been wondering how it all went, and wished we had Internet at work so I could find out sooner! Feet up, chilled glass of Shloer or something! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laura Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Really pleased at the outcome Dawn. It's made me think whether I should be installing CCTV at my new nursery..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anju Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Thank goodness for that, Dawn, I'm so relieved for you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flowlow Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 thank goodness Dawn so pleased all went well xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Froglet Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 So glad to hear the outcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MaryEMac Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Hi Dawn, Have only just found this thread and have felt for you as I was reading. So pleased to hear the outcome, and hope that you can go back and enjoy your weeks till maternity leave. It has made me realise how vulnerable we all are. Only a few weeks ago one of my key children cut his hair with the scissors and went home and told his mum that I had cut it because it was too long. Mum actually thought that we were allowed to do that !! He then blamed a child who wasn't even there on the day. It made me think what might have happened. Take care of yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 If it is something you can afford i would. I know i was greatful for it and so was the nursery owner. I can not see a downside to the cctv. Really pleased at the outcome Dawn. It's made me think whether I should be installing CCTV at my new nursery..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Dawn I'm so relieved for you, your case highlights so many issues for me. I know that children make up stories (how often, as Mary has said above, have we heard them put the blame on something to another child who isn't even in the setting that day?), but I also know that we as parents and practitioners have a duty to believe any allegation or statement a child makes that raises a safeguarding concern. As I stated in a previous post, once a complaint has been received the procedure has to be followed, with all the relevant authorities being notified. However I would query whether your policy was followed in this case: it seems pretty cruel to make you go through the days of agony you have just experienced whilst you waited around for people to be available and meetings to be convened. Do you think your employer knows exactly how you've been feeling in the interim period? Perhaps your experience can be used to look at the procedures again to ensure that things happen in the right order in future so that no-one else ever has to be kept on tenterhooks like you have? It does stress how vulnerable we are, but also how much we rely on our colleagues for support as we go about our every day work with children. It would be a depserate pity if our first thought on interacting with children or intervening in their play was to protect ourselves, but I can well imagine you will go through a period when you will think twice about how you work with children. The measures you've described are very sensible, but it does make me wonder how your colleagues will feel about supporting him with toileting when they need to be alone with him - are they going to be worried that a similar allegation will be made about them? Finally, I wonder how difficult it will be to re-form a good and trusting relationship with the child and his family? His parents must be feeling very upset and confused about what has happened - although I think you said previously that they were wondering if it had happened at all, I wonder if they need to find out why he has made this false allegation about you? Are they wondering if they can trust what he says from now on, and whether their relationship will be affected by what they've just gone through. So sad for everyone concerned, and I'm just relieved that what you knew from the outset has been proved to be correct - you did not act inappropriately and have nothing to reproach yourself for. I hope you sleep well tonight, and can get back to enjoying doing the job you love. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
narnia Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 so.............after all this, as I said, WHY ON EARTH didn't your manager just invite the parents to look at the CCTV images to see for themselves what did NOT happen?? I am very glad you have been fully exonerated, but what a palaver! Feet up tonight missy xx 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catma Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Really pleased to hear the outcome and totally agree with Narnia re amount of palaver this has been. I hope you can put it behind you and move on towards your maternity leave calmly and securely. This highlights several issues for me: Being in a union is never money wasted You can never tell when something like this will come out of the blue Although this is not the case for you, depending on how the investigation is managed the impact on the person can sometimes be much longer term even if there is nothing proved. A friend of mine now has "additional police information" on her CRB because an allegation went as far as a strategy meeting in which the police were involved, despite there being no case to answer in the end and it being referred back to the school to investigate. This cannot be removed. There is and always be vulnerabilty when you work in the way we do with children so we need to be aware of that and protect ourselves as best as we can. Cx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sox Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Sorted at last I was getting dizzy with all these going ons lol! get those feet and start chillaxing! won't be long until we're all waiting to hear whether it's a boy or a girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Really pleased to hear the outcome and totally agree with Narnia re amount of palaver this has been. I hope you can put it behind you and move on towards your maternity leave calmly and securely. This highlights several issues for me: Being in a union is never money wasted You can never tell when something like this will come out of the blue Although this is not the case for you, depending on how the investigation is managed the impact on the person can sometimes be much longer term even if there is nothing proved. A friend of mine now has "additional police information" on her CRB because an allegation went as far as a strategy meeting in which the police were involved, despite there being no case to answer in the end and it being referred back to the school to investigate. This cannot be removed. There is and always be vulnerabilty when you work in the way we do with children so we need to be aware of that and protect ourselves as best as we can. Cx How awful Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dreamgirl Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Hooray. Am very pleased it is sorted. I was ready to march up to wherever you are and start protesting on your behalf. Pointless and cruel experience for you. Glad you are already moving on though. How sensible you are. hang the flags out!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 (edited) You raise some great points, I am so greatful for the support of my collegues in backing up that nothing happened and of course the CCTV. had it not have been for the cctv proving that i did nothing this would have been on record with LADO and OFSTED for future reference, luckily as cctv proves i did nothing none of this will go on record..... such a relief. I feel for my collegues having to be in a 1-1 with him (ie toileting) especially when they know he falsly accused me. The saving grace i guess is A) he leaves at end of July as termtime only and B ) he only attends two mornings a week for 2 hours each time. I am sure i will sleep very well tonight and i am looking forward to going back to work tommorow thanks for you support and advice Dawn Dawn I'm so relieved for you, your case highlights so many issues for me. I know that children make up stories (how often, as Mary has said above, have we heard them put the blame on something to another child who isn't even in the setting that day?), but I also know that we as parents and practitioners have a duty to believe any allegation or statement a child makes that raises a safeguarding concern. As I stated in a previous post, once a complaint has been received the procedure has to be followed, with all the relevant authorities being notified. However I would query whether your policy was followed in this case: it seems pretty cruel to make you go through the days of agony you have just experienced whilst you waited around for people to be available and meetings to be convened. Do you think your employer knows exactly how you've been feeling in the interim period? Perhaps your experience can be used to look at the procedures again to ensure that things happen in the right order in future so that no-one else ever has to be kept on tenterhooks like you have? It does stress how vulnerable we are, but also how much we rely on our colleagues for support as we go about our every day work with children. It would be a depserate pity if our first thought on interacting with children or intervening in their play was to protect ourselves, but I can well imagine you will go through a period when you will think twice about how you work with children. The measures you've described are very sensible, but it does make me wonder how your colleagues will feel about supporting him with toileting when they need to be alone with him - are they going to be worried that a similar allegation will be made about them? Finally, I wonder how difficult it will be to re-form a good and trusting relationship with the child and his family? His parents must be feeling very upset and confused about what has happened - although I think you said previously that they were wondering if it had happened at all, I wonder if they need to find out why he has made this false allegation about you? Are they wondering if they can trust what he says from now on, and whether their relationship will be affected by what they've just gone through. So sad for everyone concerned, and I'm just relieved that what you knew from the outset has been proved to be correct - you did not act inappropriately and have nothing to reproach yourself for. I hope you sleep well tonight, and can get back to enjoying doing the job you love. Edited June 11, 2012 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 thank you, went out for a meal with husband to celebrate the relief i feel and baby is a boy (we were impatient and found out at our 20 week scan Sorted at last I was getting dizzy with all these going ons lol! get those feet and start chillaxing! won't be long until we're all waiting to hear whether it's a boy or a girl Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 thank you to all of you, you have all been amazing and have really helped me get through the last week or so with some level of confidence still intact I will not forget the support i received here. Dawn xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sox Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 baby is a boy (we were impatient and found out at our 20 week scan Brilliant! what a lovely event for you and your husband to look forwards to! The birth of ur beautiful baby son 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne123 Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 so glad it is over for you, now look after yourself and little bump. take care Joanne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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