Verona Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I thought this was sooo funny - If it's not suitable I'm sure someone will remove it for me ! The facecloth There is not a woman alive today who won't laugh over this one! I was due for a smear test with the doctor later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am. The trip to his office took about thirty five minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the full effort. So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pyjamas, wet the facecloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in that area to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw the facecloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to myappollltment. I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in. Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some other place a million miles away. I was a little surprised when the doctor said, 'My, we have made an extra effirt this morning, haven't we?' I didn't respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal - some shopping, cleaning and cooking. After school when my seven year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, 'Mummy, where's my ftcecloth?' I told her to get another one from the cupboard. She replied, 'No, J need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter saved inside it. ' I'm NEVER going back to that doctor ever!! Is it going to disappear? Sue J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 first real laugh I have has in ages thank you Inge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blondie Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 that is sooooo funny - glad it wasnt me though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sharky Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Thanks for making me cry with laughter! We were only just talking about smears today so I've printed this off for work tomorrow to give the big girls a laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Oh dear, I did have a good laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cait Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Excellent!!! sunnyday Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplewednesday1 Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 That's so funny!!!! How embarrasing tho' Time for a new GP I think ... probably one in a different area as you know whose story they'll be dining out on in your area!!! pw1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Reminds me of the H&S thread about using glitter Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velvet Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Brillient!! Just had my hubby giving me funny looks wondering why I'm laughing so much at the lap top!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aliamch Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 What's that phrase ....'by the grace of god......' ! Karrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Printed it for work and friends. How fabulous I could add an embarressing story of my own but I wont, I might meet some of you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lardylady Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Heheheheheh Fantastic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gezabel Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 I thought this was sooo funny - I thought it was absolutely HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!! :rolleyes: :unsure: :wacko: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running Bunny Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 That is just soooo funny.... and just what I needed to make me smile Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorna Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Thanks for that... that was funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Thanks that is the first good laugh I have had all this week!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pickle Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 That's hilarious - brought a tear to my eye after a very tough day Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hali Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 bless you - thankyou i needed good laugh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 that has really made me and my husband really laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sorry had to read it to him as i was laughing so much he asked what was so funny. So thats why they call it a twinkle!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 thanks for sharing made me laugh out so much my husband wanted to know what i was laughing at!!! he couldn't stop laughing either!!! I think we will all be checking the face clothes from now on!!! LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 :wacko: That is priceless!! Very, very funny!! And I thought I was the only 1 who things like that happened to!! Everytime I go for a smear something happens me! The last time I went for one, they couldnt get the spotlight to work. Usually there is a blanket to cover yourself with while waiting for the doctor, but on this particular day there was nothing!! I'm lyin naked from the waist down, apart from my socks, with only my hands to cover my blushes!! The nurse fiddled with the light and couldnt get it to work. She then called another nurse, who came in and left the door open and then discovered that she couldnt fix it. She then called yet another nurse, who hadnt a clue either. She then asked a male patient who was waiting for her if HE knew how to fix it!!! Obviously when I heard this I decided it was time to speak up. You would think that in this situation you might cough or clear your throat to get someones attention and let them know you are there. Not me, my attention grabbing statement was "Is anyone putting the kettle on for a cup of tea??!! When they realised I was still in the room, the third nurse rushed to stop her male patient coming in and one yelled at me to cover myself with the blanket!!!When I pointed out to her that there was no blanket, she got in a right flap and left the room and came bounding in with one. Thankfully a fourth nurse came in and fixed the light. The best of it is, all that was wrong with the spotlight was that the bulb had come loose and needed screwed in again. I had noticed this from the start and couldnt be bothered telling them! On a previous occassion it was a locum doctor performing the smear and when he walked in the room, I was yet again lying naked from the waist down. He asked me what he was seeing me for and my reply was "I'm here to get my parking validated!!". He obviously had no sense of humour and just gave me an odd look! What did he think I was there for??? :rolleyes: Might try the glitter trick the next time, with matching socks!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Hey, mummyspud - that was better than the original!! Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Hey, mummyspud - that was better than the original!! Sue There are a few more SueR, but I felt they were a bit too graphic to post! If anyone sees me in chat feel free to ask or ask Mrs Weasley, she heard them this evening!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debs1 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 How funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 If you like that one I think you will appreciate the one I received this week: Mammograms.doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 I cant open that one LJW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beau Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 I cant open that one LJW For you Rea.... Mammograms Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test and best of all, you can do these simple exercises right in and around your home. EXERCISE ONE: Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast in door. Shut the door as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Repeat again in case the first time wasn't effective enough. EXERCISE TWO: Visit your garage at 3AM when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat with the other breast. EXERCISE THREE: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set up an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again. YOU ARE TOTALLY PREPARED! AND, just a thought for all the women out there.......... MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause............. Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?.........And When we have real trouble it's HISterectomy!!!! Send this to all women to have a laugh AND, don't forget to have a mammogram!!!!!! A Friend Is Like A Good Bra... Hard to Find Supportive Comfortable Always Lifts You Up Never Lets You Down or Leaves You Hanging And Is Always Close To Your Heart!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 not too far from the truth....... just every 3 years not every year! oh and don't forget the stranger has to manhandle you into position! Inge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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