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Help, I Am Sooooo Upset!


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You are all such wonderful, wonderful people!! :(

 

Yesterday was one of the worst days of my life. I cried most of the day and shook and was a complete wreck!!! This morning I have felt much stronger, strong enough to look on here and find such lovely comments and advise. :(

 

Now I am putting it into some perspective and seeing lots of others going through complaints it makes me believe that, with all the evidence I have (and boy do I have a lot), the complaints won't be up held.

 

Your words of wisdom/care/concern have been printed out and I will cherish them for a very long time.

 

I will update you all on how it all goes, and hopefully in a few weeks/months time it will just be a distant memory :o (all be it a nasty tasting, upsetting and grim one) :(

 

I would again just like to say a big thank you to all of you out there for being understanding, caring and very knowledgable and most importantly willing to share these qualities.

 

thank-you.jpg

PS: If any of you were interested about our ratio that day 6 adults to 25 children (4 under 3, 21 over 3) xD

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Hi Shiny

 

Poor you! Just wanted to add my thoughts - we all worry ourselves sick about ratios, accidents, illnesses, etc and most of the time the children come along and have a lovely time and their parents are happy. Such a shame that it's the odd awkward person that causes so much emotion and sleepless nights! My thoughts are with you and I know you will come through this. Don't give up! You love your job, why should someone making malicious mischief force you to give it up? Do let us know how you get on tomorrow.

 

Best wishes,

 

Lesley :o

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Okay 2. Children without personal files:

 

All children have scrap book learning journeys with pictures, photographs, observations, self scribbed comments etc in, and a Development Matters booklet with highlighter marks referring to said pictures, photos, obs etc. :o These are made up for the day they start and the new thing we are doing with the newest in take (as they are a work in progress) My First Day at Preschool with photos, captions and obs from the very first day.

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no 3? :o:(

"staff don't interact with children" I gather - but given all that evidence going into their learning journeys that's probably easily dealt with too! xD

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Have you any idea who made the complaint? You could always go and let their tyres down, or poke them in the eye

 

(I am of course only joking!!).

 

Seriously though the best way to get back at whoever made the complaint is to show that it's not disconcerted you and to carry on as normal and that you are confident that the complaint will not be upheld, which of course it wont be!

 

Good luck and thinking of you :)

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Just an emphatic (I think that's the rigt word - meaning what I feel you may be feeling, what I think you may be thinking :o ) thought;

 

"Why do I feel like I have to justify, evidence, give proof for everything I do?"

"Why can't my professional position be trusted"

"Why do I have to prove innocence, has the person been asked to prove how they came to the conclusion that such things were happening?"

 

there got that off my chest. xD

 

Just remember though, you do all the learning journeys, observations, record keeping ect ALWAYS for the CHILDRENS benefit, and not to prove your worth, but just in cases like this, are,'t we glad these systems are in place. :(:(

 

So next time anyone moans about having to do observations / record keeping remember there is more than one reason that they are useful. :(

 

Shiny, What have you decided about letting other parents know about this situation?

 

Peggy

 

p.s. if parents have been told, I bet lots of support from them have already come your way.

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Oh Shiny! sending lots of support your way - I, too, have "been there, done that" with a malicious complaint.

 

It was 6 years ago and it STILL makes me cross xD

 

However, Ofsted were great. Prompt, supportive, fair and within 10 minutes of looking at the records I kept, of the day "the incident" happened, declared there was no complaint to investigate and the complaint was dismissed :o

 

The Inspector stayed on for a chat over a cup of tea afterwards and my phone never stopped ringing with other parents wanting to know how things were. She said that told her everything she needed to know and more!

 

I'm sure the parents in your setting will be just as supportive and angry on your behalf - mine quickly identified the "accuser" and put their thoughts in writing to Ofsted, too.

 

You WILL get through this, channel your hurt and anger into defending yourself and the setting and proving you have nothing to hide!

 

Take care and be kind to yourself

 

Nona

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi everyone

 

You may have noticed I have been missing for a while!! I had a lot of soul searching etc to do and have broken my computer!! :o

 

I also had to do my report for Ofsted etc. I also wrote my resignation but have been begged to stay by staff, committee, and parents (which I am). xD

 

It all had to be with them for the 19th May and it was a long document with 16 Appendicies to it too. All in all it was near 48 pages!!! But as you may know I am a bit OCD when it comes to paper work, it has to be just so.

 

It was then playing the waiting game. Well I got a call from my Chairperson yesterday evening to say Ofsted received the report, and are happy with our provision and that no further action would be taken!!!! They are not even going to visit!!

 

I am obviously really pleased and feeling very relieved. But my confidence has taken a hugh dent.

 

I am going to reduce my hours at work, take a day per week for paperwork and have Wednesdays off to spend with my little girl. More time to spend with you guys to I hope!!!!

 

It was just a quick update, I look forward to catching up with you all soon.

 

XXXXXXX

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That's great news Shiny, thanks for the update. I'm sure your confidence will be back soon, in spades, as you enjoy the ride to the summer break (assuming you get one) and then it's all systems go for the new year, new faces and the new challenge

Edited by Cait
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Oh - I think too that if you are in need of a quick giggle you must look at Sunnyday's 'To do list' thread which was started yesterday - especially in light of the fact that you have completed such a fantastic 'to do' yourself!

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Good for you Shiny, sounds like you are in control. Of course you got the OK from Ofsted! You can go back on Monday with renewed confidence and get on with the job of looking after your children.

 

Take care

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I am obviously really pleased and feeling very relieved. But my confidence has taken a hugh dent.

Well I'm so pleased for you Shiny - your experience sounds very familiar to me! :o Your confidence will rise again - and what a great vote of confidence in you on the part of committee, staff and parents! Not many of us can say we have sort of mandate for our work.

 

I'm glad to see you've taken some action to regain some space for life in your work/life balance - very sensible (especially the bit about spending more time with us here!).

 

Take care

Mx

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I am really pleased for you Shiny. Your upset and concern just reflect what a wonderful caring practitioner you are, and you have had that affirmed by OFSTED, your committee, parents and staff. Your confidence will return, but something like this we take very personally don't we?

The other positive that appears to me now, is that you have reflected on your life, and decided to make some changes giving some more time priority to yourself and your family. So enjoy your job, be proud of yourself, and have a wonderful summer with your troubles behind you.

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I am really glad to hear all is resolved - and that some 'good' has come from a horrible situation, in that uo have taken stock and getting your work/life balance a bit better for you.

 

Good luck for next week. You can go in with your head held high.

 

Gruffalo2 :o

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Really pleased for you Shiny. I have been wondering how you are and glad that everything has been resolved. Your job carries so much responsibility and I am sure that the vote of confidence in you by your committee, staff and parents go a long way to helping you carry on with the very valuable work you do. mrsW.x

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That's really good news Shiny. Had been thinking of you and how things were going. I'm really pleased that it has turned out well and your confidence will return again. :o

Edited by Guest
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So glad it all came to nothing but the stress it causes it hard to bounce back from...

 

you will regain the confidence you had, but ti will take time, I am glad that you have reflected on your job, work, home etc and begun to change you priority a bit back to yourself and home / family.. it is hard to make a good balance, but I always took a day off each week and a day as paperwork ... it helped alot, and I was always on the end of a phone while at home if they really needed me... I was lucky they never did...

 

Inge

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