behaviour management

[blondie]

we are looking to reviewing the way we deal with inappropriate behaviour - can anyone give me ideas on how they work with this especially with children who have behaviour issues.

thank you

[lashes2508]

Any particular inappropriate behaviour ?

We use consistency, positive praise, pasta points , visual aids , timers, and choices and observations and as much info as possible to understand the behaviour .

Edited March 7, 2015 by lashes2508

[LKeyteach]

Hi Blondie

Managing behaviour is never easy.

We look at each child as an individual and each individual behaviour.

Some inappropriate behaviour needs ignoring others need child talking to and some even requir a plan.

I would say that you need to start by defining what you consider inappropriate behaviour rembering that something that you consider inappropriate for a 4 year old may not be for a 2 year old.

Then you could give examples of inappropriate behaviours and how you would challenge it. At some point you may have to get parents involved.

Most behaviours have been triggered by some event which to us may seem unimportant but to the child could be the most catoshtrophic thing to have happened.

 

I've got a group of boys who just seem to wandering and causing trouble but we all know that once they have found a challenging activity the behaviour calms, we do feel that by this stage they should be finding their own challenges however we just have to be patient and spend time with them.

 

Do you want to be a bit more specific about what is troubling you. Then we can give you some examples of how we would challenge them.

Good Luck

[blondie]

we have a boy who started with us just before feb half term - he ignores any boundaries/ rules we have - running inside, throws things,he pushes, knocks down /breaks up anything a child has made, will not join in any group activities - singing, small group etc. last week he started spitting and used the f word as well as the t word - the list goes on.

at first we tried to ignore his behaviour but it became impossible because of what he was doing and saying. we have spoken to him saying the usual its not him its his behaviour we aren't happy with/was making us sad etc - his retort was i don't care, i do it if i want to.

we don't see mum as he is dropped off by great gran dad - who is over 88 - and we think he struggles with him so don't want to put further pressure on him at the moment - great gran dad says mum cant get out at the moment so he will be picking up for foreseeable.

we have no information about where he was before us (he is 4) - great gran dad not sure and no reply from any letters sent to mum and calls aren't answered so everything through great gran dad.

the whole session has changed dramatically since he arrived - he just seems on mission to disrupt anything and everything and it is also making it hard as youger / easily led children are wanting to join him.

[finleysmaid]

oh dear i think i'd be making a call to social care to ensure he is not known to them.....he may well have been moved to cover up issues!

At 4 he needs to be removed from the situation i feel .....good behaviour equals reward....bad behaviour= no play. You may have to remove to a separate area until he stops swearing in order to protect the other children. (record record record!!!!)

[blondie]

thanks finleysmaid - have checked already and not known to social care - will have a chat with my team on monday with any suggestions recieved.

[finleysmaid]

Oh good! Health visitor any the wiser? (i assume you have seen his birth certificate...so that he isn't known by another name?)

[Fredbear]

As part of your procedures on entry did the family confide in any previous settings he attended, or of any concerns at home etc

I would document all situations and actions. Try to remove him each time it occurs if this is possible, give positive praise if you can.

Seems like there could be a lot going on at home, so a meeting/ discussion with the parents if you can to help support them all.

If you feel he is at a developmental stage to understand right from wrong then I would begin to put in place some strategies for him of rules etc, and repercussions of any negative behaviours. This might be in the form of a behaviour chart, with a small reward for positive behaviours. Gets to choose an activity, plays with a special piece of equipment etc.

It's amazing how one little person can change the dynamics of a session/day.

[Mouseketeer]

Did social care seem remotely interested other than to say the family weren't known to them ? maybe mums not even around and great grandad is covering for her by saying she can't get out, maybe he has no boundaries or structure at home, especially if an elderly relative is his main carer if mum isn't up to it for whatever reason, it doesn't sound great from just the language he is using, as finleysmaid says I'd be contacting HV team

[Foreveryoung]

I would probably do as suggested above remove, you have tried by sounds of it the talking, rewarding positives and he seems to understand too from your post. We never remove as in no play at all, we just remove from activity or area this could including saying a specific area they have to go to, then continue playing with other children in that area in a very dynamic way, this draws the removed child attention and creates a desire to return which is refused first off then when we see the facial desperation of needing to return we say we need to talk about it first, in which time we revisit the rules of the area and warn they will be removed if they break the rules.

If child doesn't want to return then fine we continue forth but still revisit child at chat about it a short time after as usually the child has calmed somewhat and can cope with talking through it in a more rational way.

Each time positive behaviour is rewarded in a heightened manner for a while after each incident to drive home the message.

Glad it's not only my children that swear ! I have two year olds at it too (reassurance I'm not alone lol)

[lashes2508]

Consistency - anything that is thrown he is to pick up ensure everyone is diligent with this

Swearing - we found a simple but firm no thankyou and ignore where possible

Outside play - one to one

Reward system for any good behaviour

Giving responsibility - jobs

 

It does sound from what you have said that home life could be difficult , he is using the setting to let off steam and get some attention in whichever way possible

I would suggest as others have to record all behaviour , try to make contact with mum and pursue HV as they may know more

 

If you have outside support area senco to come in and observe and support with strategies

 

A child with no boundaries has no fences to climb , a child with boundaries will attempt to climb but is always reminded what they are

[finleysmaid]

Just reading your post again ....i think you need to talk to great grandad again. You need some answers ....where is Mum, why can't she get here? where are the rest of the family.....tell him that you can see that this little boy is quite lively and is he also challenging at home? and tell him that you are there to help, but in order to do so you need a little more information about this chap. Reassure G grandad that there are lots of things you can put in place but they need to be done NOW or his entry in to school is going to be tricky(i assume he starts in september) Or have i got this wrong and you are reception....i can never remember what settings people are in!!!

Are this family english BTW? (we have lots of situations in this area where children are sent across from romania....and left on the town hall steps!)

[LKeyteach]

I agree with all the actions mentioned above but you are not going to correct the behaviour without the family on your side. You really must get mum and g grandparents to meet with you. I know this could be difficult but if mum can't get out can you have meeting at her house. Set out all the positives - he comes in without crying and I'm sure you can find one or two others then talk about some of the behaviours and start by trying to fix one or two.

You probably know all this but sometimes when you get caught in the moment it can get forgotten.

Good Luck my thoughts are with you as you struggle through this difficult time.

[manor]

Hi found this -20 Tips for Behavior from somewhere maybe useful.

We too are having behavior issues with a 3yr old in our setting (mostly just randomly hitting/pushing other children over, then storming off in temper when you try to address it.) so not quite as serious as yours, but still feel your pain. Our EYIO advised us to try where possible to ignore the bad behavior and praise the child every 30 seconds. Even suggested having the jar and marbles reward scheme like they do in school -where all children in the class take part. Trouble is I'm not sure how I would reward our children when the jar is full? It;s not like we could give them extra time at playtime or let them go play on the grass area with skipping ropes and footballs etc So I don't really want to start something we cant follow through with. Will try the ignoring and praising bit first see how we get on.

 

20 tips for good behaviour.doc

[Upsy Daisy]

You can't manage behaviour until you understand the reasons behind it.

 

This child probably has some major challenges in his life and I think you need to know more about what they are before you start trying to change his behaviour.

 

I agree with contacting the HV and taking more steps to arrange a meeting with the parents, at the child's home if necessary.

 

Once you have more information about this child's history and the challenges he faces, you may have some ideas about how to help meet his needs more effectively and his behaviour may naturally improve as a result. Once you have more information and are working in communication with, if not in cooperation with the parents, you can consider putting a behaviour plan in place for him and this is then far more likely to be successful.