garrison Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 We have a child who's dad has died over the weekend - we are not sure but we think it may be suicide. For anyone who remembers this is the boy with the pinch marks on his ears. Can anyone help us with what to say or books to buy to help him get through this - we have never dealt with this before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Sorry to hear this news, Rachel. There is a thread here that might help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JacquieL Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Winstons's Wish may be of help. http://www.winstonswish.org.uk/ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyfs1966 Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 just wanted to give my condolences to you. Such a sad situation to be faced with. Poor poor child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fredbear Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Such very sad news. We accessed resources from the local Senco team when we had children with a bereavement of a family member. We also liaised with the families involved on their wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Grief encounter may be worth a look But best advice is to keep setting as normal as possible, and check with family how much the child knows before going any further , I usually found that they all had different ways of dealing with what or how much they told the children... better not to say / do anything until you know, 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Nothing more to add but just wanted to send a virtual hug to your and your team....sad time for all concerned Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Thinking of you all. xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stargrower Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 No more advice but I'm thinking of you all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Oh how very, very sad - sending hugs xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berryred Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 sad news to hear Thinking of you all x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rappers Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 That's so sad. We had a similar situation and were able to access a local bereavement charity http://www.fsncharit...dragonflies.htm who were able to offer some advice and support to the setting and staff in addition to supporting the family after we'd gently signposted them to the charity for additional support. We were also able to borrow a bereavement case of resources from the Early Years, Childcare and Extended Schools Service, East Sussex County Council which had reference books as well as appropriate children's books about all types of bereavement. Even if you're not in East Sussex, your county dept might have similar support they could offer? The advice that we had from Dragonflies was to be consistent and honest with the child about the situation which can be tricky depending on the families wishes. Take care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zigzag Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 We had a little girl who was three when her Mum died, we kept everything as normal as possible for her but with many extra cuddles as she wanted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
finleysmaid Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 really good advice from Inge...try to find out what he knows first then you are prepared for the questions. Carry on as normal...try not to over empathise with him but be prepared to offer support if he feels the need. Offer support to the Mum (cup of tea if she wants, pop in when she likes, extra sessions ?? if that helps) Is he a funded child? if not perhaps try to sort out the bill so that she doesn't need to worry (the local parish council may help with costs). Talk to your staff and let them express their thoughts too and how you are all going to handle things Love and hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barcombeplaygroup Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 I have worked in Early Years for nearly 15 years and over the last 6 months we have had 3 children lose a parent, two to illness and one to a tragic road accident. We found our local Macmillan Nurse extremely helpful. She told us to remember that children under 4 do not really grieve like adults, she also said that it is really important to be very honest with them if they ask questions. It is not helpful to use phrases such as "Mummy/Daddy has gone to sleep etc. as at this age children will take it literally and wonder why they don't wake up. She also told us that they encourage parents to allow children to the funeral as they may become resentful in later life. We also found the Winstons Wish charity website very helpful. All in all the children concerned have all coped incredibly well, at such a young age they seem to take it all in there stride and are very matter of fact about everything. (They are 2, 3 and 3). Good luck such a sad situation to deal with, we just try to be as supportive as we can be to the children and surviving parent. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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