Pulling My Hair Out!

[Guest]

Hello everyone, help!

 

I was delighted at the end of July when I realised we were fully booked at our setting and felt so positive about starting the new school year......now I am tearing my hair out with so many children, so many new starters, children that have increased their hours and cannot cope with it thus becoming disruptive, aggressive, so basically our three days this week have consisted mainly of...

 

 

new children unsettled, crying, needing changing, etc etc, a child with additional needs that needs more than one person at times to support him, four unruly boys that have extended their hours and fight continuously....

 

my solution is to think and think and then confront some parents with the simple fact that their two year old child needs to settle in at a slow steady process and cannot cope with a whole day (I know - shocking - we have been telling parents until we are blue in the face that this is not appropriate and parents have assured us their child will be fine) - and the disruptive children - I have spoken to parents who to be fair, two have been great and may reduce hours and work with us but the other two are astounded that we are suggesting they spend less time with us.....'they are funded and have rights' - as a once, calm inviting environment we have become a noisy, unsettled horrible environment so the other 15 children in on a session have virtually no support from us as we are stopping fights, changing children, caring for our SEN child, answering the phone, trying to conduct a meeting with the physio, no extra staff could come in to cover......(22 children, 6 of which are 2 year olds - 4 staff - 1 beautiful setting, one room though, outside area an abundance of play space outside... )...

 

 

sorry it has been a hell of a day......we also have a couple of children sleeping in the day which - although we should be- we are not really set up for - we have no separate area, tis a nightmare!!!!!!

 

Feeling very despondent......imagine (and I am sure some of you will have done this) speaking to a parent because you want their child to have a nice time at nursery and explaining that it is too much too soon for them and them saying 'oh well persevere she will be fine' - the child cried all morning, I rang parents and couldnt get hold of anyone? or contacts? I am losing my faith in parents at the setting......

 

 

My committee have suggested we say that two year olds cannot stay for a whole day? Can we say that?

 

rant over.......arrrrghhhhh

[sunnyday]

Oh shirel - poor you - sending sympathy, empathy and a very big virtual hug........

 

Have to say our new term hasn't got off to the best of starts either......but not quite as bad as yours

[hali]

owww bless you - Septembers always the worst intake and believe me you are not alone - beeen into a lot of my settings this week who are exactly the same - it will settle down soon honestly

[louby loo]

Difficult situation (I had similar issues last week). We are one hall, not designated outdoor area, we have one out/all out which I am not really happy about.

We are trying to get out owner to cut the hours we offer a 6.5 hour day which 'one hall' not outside area is not good for the children!

Owner wants any many children for as long as possible (understandably) however to many tired butterfly two year olds does not work well. With us is the set up too....... The only staff that are able to work the full days also have to do all the setting up and packing away with only a 20min break with no proper rest area = very tired staff!!!

 

Sorry not much help but just to let you know you're not alone! We find our afternoon sessions are 'crowd control' purely due to large amount on 2 years olds in an unstuitable (big hall) environment. We're not happy either.

xx

 

xxx

[HappyMaz]

Oh dear shirel, it does sound a bit fraught to say the least.

 

My initial thoughts are that perhaps your group has bit off a bit more than you can chew in terms of the mix of newbies and under twos that you've taken on, however now that you're there perhaps you need to look at ways of making things a bit more manageable.

 

Can you split the group up into smaller more manageable groupings, perhaps separating a few children who don't react well together? Having everyone in one big room can be very trying, especially when the noise levels rise. If you can get the children outside as much as possible it might help some of the more active learners and curb a bit of their... overexuberance.

 

As for your babies, I agree that for some all day is probably too young. I can't see why you shouldn't be able to say how long they can attend - after all as you say you're not equipped for a daytime nap, and it is important that you are able to meet the needs of all the children in the group and this can be difficult when you have so many other calls on your time.

 

Can you persuade some committee members to come in and support you in these early days of the term during the settling in period? I would also definitely tell parents that it is important that they are available to collect their child if they are upset for a prolonged period, and if despite your best efforts you really can't placate them.

 

And although it has happened rarely, we have had two year olds whose parents were absolutely confident that they would be fine, ultimately we have decided between us to stop the child attending, and wait for a bit longer until they were ready for nursery. Now that I look back, none of them actually returned to my nursery.

 

I'm so sorry I can't be of much help - to be honest with my busiest day having only 8 children I envy your healthy numbers. Perhaps I should thank my lucky stars?

 

Maz

[Fredbear]

Oh deary me and i thought ours was a little hectic. I would certainly not have two year olds immediately they start for a whole day unless you are set up as a nursery.

I have to say and this may be something you could consider in the future but of no use to you right now, is the half-term before our children are due to join us they come in with parent/carers for one hour per week. This enables them to meet their keyperson, get to know their surroundings so that when they start proper we already know quite a bit about them and their likes and dislikes.

We have over twenty newbies and all but one can't wait to get in the door and they cry when they go home.

We also depending on the age of the child do a smaller session so the newbies come in slightly later leave slightly earlier and build the session up gradually, normally takes two or three weeks and they are all coming in for the whole time.

Have done this for the last ten years very successfully might be worth a try.

This also allows you some time with your returning children from the previous term, you can get then fully engaged in activities before the others arrive.

Sorry to waffle on and i hope you get the gist of what i'm trying to say.

Just to tell you we had a really tough time last year for other reasons and so hope this year will be much improved so i do sympathise.

Hope things improve for you to soon.

[eyfs1966]

Hi Bridger

We also depending on the age of the child do a smaller session so the newbies come in slightly later leave slightly earlier and build the session up gradually, normally takes two or three weeks and they are all coming in for the whole time.

 

Having also had a difficult first week would love to know how you do this in slightly more deatil as would like to chenge our induction process from next Sept.

 

To Shirel...I'm feeling your pain! I know the first few weeks of the September term can be very difficult, but keep the faith...it WILL get better!!

[Fredbear]

Hi eyfs1966 will pm you later on today with our induction process.

Have a good day.

[louby loo]

Hi eyfs1966 will pm you later on today with our induction process.

Have a good day.

 

bridger - We do this too, but out of interest if the child is paying for the session do you charge less for the settling process?

Up until now (fingers crossed) we've charged the full amount and only one parent has asked for a refund on the short sessions. The owner does full invoice from day one - but I do feel guilty especially if it's us saying to only do an hour or so to start with.

[HappyMaz]

bridger - We do this too, but out of interest if the child is paying for the session do you charge less for the settling process?

I offer free settling visits - it doesn't seem fair to charge when parents generally stay with their children for the whole session, or leave them with us only for an hour or so.

 

Maz

[louby loo]

I offer free settling visits - it doesn't seem fair to charge when parents generally stay with their children for the whole session, or leave them with us only for an hour or so.

 

Maz

 

 

Arhh.. well I suppose it's swings and roundabouts then.......... we had settling visits before the break when the children came for an hour 2 or 3 times before the summer break- although parents did have to stay with them.

I don't feel quiet so bad now

[Fredbear]

Hi we have half a term of 1 hour visiting with parents staying, then when the new children start for up to the first half-term we have a shorter session. So our normal session times are now 9 to 12 or 1 to 4, our new children come in at 9.30 to 11.30 or 1.30 to 3.30. As this generally only takes approximately two or three weeks in practice, we do not adjust the fees for this.

 

However throughout the year we have lots of activities on different days that all children are invited to participate in free, even though it may not be their sessional day, so we feel we more than compensate for the time at the beginning. This is clearly in our Preschool prospectus which all parent/carers are given with their induction packs and we have never had a parent object to this. They actually can see that the child's interest and happiness is very much at the forefront of everything that we do.

 

Definitely works for us all as all new children being left and no parent/carer in sight and only week two.

Hope i have written this clearly and not waffled on too much.

[laura]

We offer 5 free settling in sessions and the majority of parents took this up. Also this year we asked most people to do their settling in sessions in September as 7 weeks off was too long, it means we are out of pocket as we have saved the sessions until they are ready but it helps - not when you get 8 parents and children turn up today though - hectic doesn't begin to describe it!

 

Most parents do take us up on our settling in sessions but we can't force them - and then they wonder why their child is crying. Saw an older sibling at school yesterday and said I'd seen their little sister at pre-school and she replied 'she hates going'. Felt like saying well if your mum had done the tasters and visited for more than 10 minutes before leaving her for 2 whole days she may feel a bit differently!!!!! Ah parents, don't you just love them!

[SueJ]

We tried this for the first time this year and I suppose there are limitiations depending on when the autumn term starts

 

2 x 2.5 hour parent accompanied stay and play sessions with a taster of resources, snacks and routines on the thursday and friday before opening for autumn term on 6 September.

 

Phased entry of 3 new starters per day max. in age order.

 

At the end of week two we are already up to capacity (its a busy year for us this year) and it hasn't been too bad and both children and staff have had a relatively stress free start to the year.

 

Biggest drawback is being out of pocket as did not charge for stay and play settling in sessions and couldn't quite persuade LA that they could count as part of our autumn term, however have done a questionnaire to new starters parents to evaluate and intend to use quality supplement £s with questionnaire analysis for justification