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Swineflu Spam


JacquieL
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I called the Swine Flu hotline - all I got was crackling

 

I heard that the first symptom is that you come out in rashers.

 

Another is that you get the trotts.

 

I woke up with pig tails this morning ... Should I be worried?

 

The doctor asked me how long I'd had the symptoms of Swine Flu. I said it must have been about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeek!

 

Apparently my mate's got Swine Flu - I think he's just telling porkies!

 

The only known cure for Swine Flu in humans has been found to be the liberal application of oinkment.

 

IF YOU GET AN EMAIL ABOUT SWINE FLU DELETE IT AS ITS ONLY SPAM.

 

This little piggy went to market,

This little piggy stayed at home,

This little piggy had roast beef,

This little piggy had none,

And this little piggy had influenza A virus subtype hemagglutinin protein 1 neuraminidase protein 1.

 

Swine flu however, is not a problem for the pigs because they're all going to be cured anyway!

News Flash .... This just in. The world's religious leaders have issued a joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the aporkalypse.

 

Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu. Scientists say they will find a cure when pigs fly.

 

I just heard on the news that, "Swine Flu could potentially be a threat to every single person in the world". Well it's a good thing I'm married then, isn't it?

 

This is not a time for panic. It is no pig deal. It is a mild hamdemic, don't believe the spam you're getting.

-- :o

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I've saved it for Maz before now but I don't mind rolling it out for special occasions. :o

It is my very favourite smiley!

 

I'm not sure where I got this one from but since the 'bad taste' swine flu jokes are out, I thought I'd share. With apologies if I got it here...

 

Maz

 

post-8466-1249298450_thumb.jpg

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:(:(:(

 

THANKS MADE ME SMILE TOO. xD

 

Peggy

 

p.s. Had a phone call this morning at 8am (which woke me up :wacko: ), it was my next door neighbours elderly mum. My next door neighbour has the Swine Flu so she asked "could we bring in any parcels which may be delivered for her" (of course, we always do )...and also "she may want to sit out in the garden when recouperating so could we keep our 4 children away from her". (to stop them getting it).

My neighbour is lovely so now I'm thinking how can I ensure she gets peace and quiet to recover with 4 children, a trampoline and pool next door. :o

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My neighbour is lovely so now I'm thinking how can I ensure she gets peace and quiet to recover with 4 children, a trampoline and pool next door. :o

Oh you are 'lovely' too and so considerate........wishing your neighbour a speedy recovery.........

 

Have no idea how to keep your 4 'quiet' - good luck!!! xD

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