Bad day

[MarshaD]

So we've had a little love join us that is a real firecracker. He's two years nine months, has English as an additional language and in my humble opinion a sensory processing issue. He's like a pinball bouncing off the walls and other children. Pushing, screaming and constantly falling over although he rarely cries or appears hurt. We also have a very quiet little boy who was premature and appears to have a global delay. He was a precious baby and we have worked hard to gain Mum's trust and get the child settled. Anyway child A has taken to harassing child B and after I gave Mum another accident form today she lost the plot completely and is withdrawing him. I understand why she's cheesed off (she's vowed to 'have' the parent of the child concerned) she feels it's not fair and she's not sending him to preschool to get bullied. I tried to explain things from a developmental point of view but she just wasn't interested. I've also offered her a morning place. Not sure there was anything else I could have done but I feel like poo now. Sorry, just wanted to offload.

[lsp]

Sorry to hear you feel down Marsha. It's difficult situation. Had you requested support for either of the children or at the 'observing' gathering evidence stage.

[finleysmaid]

Had you requested support for either of the children or at the 'observing' gathering evidence stage.

What support??? interested to know what others are receiving from their LEA's....

 

MarshaD ...Really tricky, Hopefully she will opt for the mornings ...but she may just come up with another excuse to take him out, some parents just aren't ready for pre-school.

As for your other little one keep a really close eye on him, I suspect he's just trying to make friends but doesn't know how.

[sunnyday]

So sorry to read that Marsha - chin up you have tried your best to accommodate this mums needs- quite sure that you don't need any advice from me but do keep a log of all conversations........

[hopeytg]

a very difficult situation which I think you have handled well - sometimes you just have to accept that you can't please everyone but with the knowledge you tried your best. Stay positive - it is a reflection of how good a practitioner you are that you are upset x

[Upsy Daisy]

I think, as finleysmaid says, this might be the excuse she was looking for to withdraw him. Maybe she felt under pressure to send him before either of them were ready.

You may still get him back when he's closer to school age.

 

You did the very best you could for both children. Nobody could ask for more.

Look on the bright side - at least you won't need to be the referee when this mother decides to 'have' the other parent.

[LKeyteach]

It is so difficult. Especially when one child is so special.

I have found that by explaining the strategies being put in place to prevent future episodes sometimes works.

With our little speedy sensory children who need support we tag them. Wherever they start playing a grown up will support when child "spins" off to another area we make another adult aware. That way child is never to far away from help.

Could you do this and might this give mum some more confidence?

But I do suspect tat mum is not ready for preschool just yet herself.

Good luck and I wish you a better day tomorrow.

[MarshaD]

Thanks everyone. Mum has turned down offer of a morning place and plans to look elsewhere. It's a shame because he took a lot of settling but she's made her mind up. At least I tried and I feel better for all your support. We will keep a close eye on our pinball and model a more positive way of interacting. As if that wasn't enough of a challenge, his mother has decided the time is right for toilet training. He has not shown any dry nappies or indication of toileting awareness and despite my quite blunt insistence that the time is not yet right she wants us to ask (take) him every 20 minutes! Got to love early years!

[finleysmaid]

Doesn't surprise me that she's taken that decision and as upsy says she probably won't put him in somewhere till much later (if at all!)

really not your problem but it's always hard :huh:

As to your other little chap taking every 20 minutes is neither practical or useful and she is going to have a heck of a time at home if she's going about it that way. This is a child who is really active...he's not going to want to sit down every time he starts playing.

My criteria is a dry nappy after about 2 hours and indications of knowing they are wet/dirty ...sounds like you might have a battle on your hands there too! (perhaps refer her to eric.org??)

[SueFinanceManager]

 

 

despite my quite blunt insistence that the time is not yet right she wants us to ask (take) him every 20 minutes! Got to love early years!

 

Are you breaking up for half term next week? You could suggest she does all the ground work over the holidays

[MarshaD]

We are on half term next week and yes have suggested she crack on if she's determined! Thanks for the reminder about ERIC, will signpost.

 

Mum has relented and agreed to take the morning place so watch this space...