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Aggressive boys


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We have a few boys in our preschool room that are far too rough and tumble. some of them understand others needs and some of them don't. One of them I can just tell is going to be a school bully!

Does anyone have any suggestions of stories about posive behaviour?

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In my humble opinion reading stories about positive behaviour may fall on deaf ears. I think the best way of improving behaviour is by modelling it. There is a phrase that says social skills and behaviour are "caught not taught". Praise the good, ignore the bad as much as you can. Set challenges if that is appropriate for their age and stage of development. Make sure they have activities / provision to engage them in things that interest them. Show them how to play if that is what's needed. Model, model, model and praise, praise, praise!

 

Also I'd be a bit wary of labelling a child a bully at this age, even just to yourself. There's a risk that he might live up to expectations!

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The first question I would ask myself is what do I need to change in my setting to meet the needs of these boys who clearly need lots of space and physical play? It's not a case of teaching them that who they are and how they feel is wrong - your job is to recognise what their needs are and respond to it appropriately.

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I normally think to myself in this situation is 'if all the staff were male would they find the behaviour acceptable. How much rough and tumble is too much. We have a mat area where they take their shoes off and rough and tumble. It makes it acceptable to staff.

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Don't think I explained myself clear enough so now I have a bit more time I will elaborate.

While some of these are just rough and tumble I feel that a couple of them are deliberately hurting others. One of them admits he has hit or pushed but always has a reason eg I wanted to get past, or I want that toy.

I wanted some ideas of books to recommend for parents to use at home so the kind hands message is reinforced there too.

We know all about boys needing to be active and do provide lots of opportunities to let off steam but sometimes I feel these boys are sometimes just mean on purpose

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