sunnyday Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Hi all I own and manage a small pre-school in a tiny village....... Obviously all parents know exactly where I live.........I like to maintain a friendly but professional relationship with parents - this can be difficult in a small village because paths cross all the time - village events, school run etc.etc. Now my question is.......I often have parents say "oh I'll drop that round to your house later" - usually forgotten payments or paperwork that they need to return to me...... I have a huge problem with this, always have.........this is my home and not an extension of my workplace........is that unreasonable, am I just being weird? Feel free to say yes! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 No, you are no being unreasonable. You are entitled to that privacy. Do you go and haggle them on their doorstep? (Rhetorical question!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mps09 Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Hi, we're the same - I often have parents 'grab' me in the school classroom when I'm trying to drop off my own children! I have a major issue with this, firstly this is a time for me to settle my own children at school... and secondly I never remember what I've been told when I'm hassled from my own school run!! So no I don't think your being 'weird' just normal.... I don't have the problem with parents dropping things into my house though so maybe slightly different. The supervisor wrote a note to all parents asking that they did not discuss pre-school matters with staff outside of pre-school hours.... doesn't make that much difference though. But when it comes to payments, could you not say that you are not insured to have money at home and would prefer that it was brough into pre-school! or claim to be really disorganised at home and that you might loose it! alternatively, I love my job but when I'm not working - I'm not working ... and prefer to keep work administration away from my home life. Hopefully the parents are only human - though that can be questionable and would understand where you are coming from. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 (edited) Not unreasonable at all, you could be walking round the house naked for all they know, and might need privacy, or what if you're yelling at someone to do something and they hear?! Home is your place to be yourself, I have been known to scoot up a different aisle in Sainsburys because I've seen a parent or child and didnt want to smile and be nice. I have had to include my postal address on some things for playgroup because post will otherwise go to the vicarage which doesnt have a vicar anymore so we'd wait forever for it. I dont like doing it. And isnt it a let down when you hear the postman or find something on the mat and discover its from work rather than something nice? Edited January 23, 2010 by Rea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted January 23, 2010 Author Share Posted January 23, 2010 Thanks all! Rea - if they caught me naked - they'd never come back! Hey now there's an idea....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upsy Daisy Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Being an childminder means that some parents feel free to call round to my house at any time. I too have a problem with this because they feel free to stand in my hall and chat even when I am in the middle of cooking. I make sure I am free to talk about their child every pick up and drop off time but they just don't seem to see the difference. I don't particularly like people dropping round when I might have pile of washing being sorted on the sofa or maybe we're all snuggled up in front of a DVD. Mind you, Sunnyday, it could be worse. At least Ofsted won't ever do it to you! My last inspector got her diary mixed up and turned up on my day off when I was in the middle of a load of housework just before jumping in the bath! She insisted on coming in anyway saying she wanted to see the house how it normally was! I had to quickly phone round and find a child to borrow so she didn't come back the next day too! It's hard to know what to do about it without causing offence - which is easily done and long remembered in a village environment. Please do let me know if you find a good solution Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Oh Upsy Daissy, thats terribel. Could you put something into your info pack that asks parents to remember this is your home and that you have a family? Funny how some people seem not to worry about other people! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted January 23, 2010 Author Share Posted January 23, 2010 Thanks Upsy Alison Daisy! I don't know what the answer is.....nice to know I'm not the only person to feel like this! Perhaps I need to alert my parents to a few 'ground rules'.........hmmm ..........perhaps I could get one of those signs - those ones that say No hawkers, no pedallers etc. etc. and I could add 'and no pre-school parents' - that would do the trick!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 You are most definetly not weird....I think it is rude of parents to come to your house....I wouldn't dream of doing that...you need to separate the two..poor you...difficult though...I find myself stepping over my own boundaries all the time with parents....it's probably because you are such a kind person....unfortunately if you give people an inch .......hope you can sort it out to establish your home as your castle! (private castle) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
louby loo Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 I agree wholeheartly - I'm in the same position, but what angers me even more is that I 'manage' not own...however the owner thinks they can come to my house at anytime and discuss all things pre-school in my time!!!! xxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted January 23, 2010 Author Share Posted January 23, 2010 You are all soooo kind - thank you - this has been a problem for years but seems to be even more so now - how reassuring to be told I'm not weird!!! My husband and sons answer is, and I quote 'Just tell them'..........forgive me all male fsf users....but I do think men tend to see things in 'black and white' and as we know there is no such thing in Early Years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 Perhaps if you have some sort of open day or after session get together with the parents to 'update' them on your practise and policies or something like that. You could do a short presentation on a variety of things and include a small bit about not coming to your home. If you explain that it's for privacy reasons and draw a parallel between them not wanting their boss and/or clients coming over to their houses to talk about work outside working hours I'm sure they will see that you are being reasonable and take a second look at their own behaviour. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thumperrabbit Posted January 23, 2010 Share Posted January 23, 2010 I also live very close to our school and have people knocking on the door because their little one needs the loo!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted January 23, 2010 Author Share Posted January 23, 2010 I also live very close to our school and have people knocking on the door because their little one needs the loo!! Oh my goodness! What a cheek! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bigsue Posted January 24, 2010 Share Posted January 24, 2010 I have the same problem Sunnyday, parents havn't caught me NAKED but slobbing in PJ's, no makeup and hair everywhere (Family are used to this look) On returning to pre-school they said 'Didn't think you would be in today you didn't look well at the weekend' I didn't think I looked that bad Not good but not that bad I now would rather have a late payment or paperwork and tell them to bring it in next time, but we can't always do that. My question is would they do this to a headteacher at a school?????? I don't think so! But that could mean we are working well with our parents Ofsed would like it Sue In a small village too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted January 24, 2010 Author Share Posted January 24, 2010 On returning to pre-school they said 'Didn't think you would be in today you didn't look well at the weekend' I didn't think I looked that bad Not good but not that bad Sue In a small village too! Well really - how rude! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted January 24, 2010 Share Posted January 24, 2010 My husband and sons answer is, and I quote 'Just tell them' Well they do have a point, sunnyday! I'd suggest that you write a little bit in your next newsletter asking people to respect your family's privacy and not to visit your home to discuss matters relating to preschool, or to deliver paperwork etc. My son often drifts around the house in his boxers and a t-shirt and he'd be mortified if he was confronted by a parent in our front room. Not that they'd ever get let through the front door, I have to say! I'm lucky enough not to live in the village where my preschool is, for more reasons than this one! Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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