Time Off

[emmajess]

My daughter has just started reception and her Christmas play is coming up. I asked my head for time out that afternoon to go and see the play and she wasn't sure - she's thinking about it. I'm the only parent of a school-age child working full time at the school, but there are a couple of others with babies and she's anxious about setting a precedent for all teachers to go to their child's christmas play. I don't want her to make an exception for me, obviously, but at the moment it is only me. It's in an afternoon when I have 12 children with me and my TA and when I've had courses, my head has been happy to leave just my TA with the class (as has my TA). Other people in other year groups wouldn't be able to do this but I / whoever the reception teacher was if not me could cover them, they could swap PPA etc.

 

I understand that it's asking a favour, and I don't think she's obliged to let me go, but I would have thought that in a school where we recognise the importance of children and parents, as opposed to another kind of business, and where I work so hard on other people's children's christmas play, I would be given that as a goodwill, caring for the staff kind of gesture.

 

It occurred to me thatmaybe I was making an issue out of it and it was just one of the things I feel guilty about as a full time working mum and maybe Rosa wouldn't mind at all, but when I gently mentioned that i might not be able to come, but that Daddy and Nana would be there, she was crying for ages and quite upset. I felt terrible.

 

So, I was wondering what kind of policies do your schools have for this situation? Do teachers get to go to watch their children's christmas plays? I also wondered about unpaid parental leave - could I take that if she decides no? Please could you help as it would give me a better idea of a conversation to have with my head if she says no. Thank you. x

[Marion]

My current head is very family centred (he has a young family himself so is understanding) but I missed all my children's school events when they were young as previous head didn't allow this.

[Susan]

I think it very much depends on your HT. Some will let you, others wont. As a working mum though, hard as it you are going to have think hard about just how much time you are going to want and that is probably why your head is thinking about this---the list of firsts or onlys could be significant---first sports day, first leading role etc etc.

 

I have worked for heads who would have been happy about this and those that wouldnt. Your head is reluctant to allow this and I think you need to ask either to swop your PPA time or for unpaid leave. BUT you also need to tell your daughter now that you will not always be able to come to school events.

 

Sorry if that sounds harsh.

[Cait]

As a Preschool Manager it's certainly hard when my staff ask for time to go to school things with their children in. Occasionally in the past we've got round it by us all going, en masse, but it's not always practical. Last year we were all invited to the school play dress rehearsal, so got round it that way. I really DO want the staff to see their children in things, as you say, we're in the business of parental liaison so it seems wrong to say, 'do as I say and not as I do'.

[mundia]

My head was always quite fair about this, and I could attend if my TAs were happy to cover the class, and I took only the time I needed (say 2 hours). It worked the same the other way too, if my TAs went off, we would not get any additional cover but had to manage without them, it was part of the deal.

 

Fortunately we all had older children so it didn't happen that often.

[Scarlettangel]

I was sat here thinking about why I never asked if I could attend a Christmas play

with either of my children and then I remembered (daughter 20 and son 17)

that the school they were at ALWAYS put on at least 2 shows, one in the afternoon and one in the evening.

 

I personally would think that the school hosting the play is exempting many parents from attending if the show is only on during the day time!!!!

[JacquieL]

I have worked for two HT's who allowed the staff half a day in the run up to Christmas as long as it didn't cost the school anything, the HT wasn't expected to help out and staff sorted out cover for each other. Only one out at a time. This worked well as it was fair on everybody. That meant some went to see their children at school and others went shopping I think.

[Gezabel]

We are a small preschool with a combination of full and partime staff. Staff with school age children are given time off to attend their children's school concerts, assemblies, sports days or anything else. Occasionally it involves them having half a day off but for special assemblies it's more a case of just coming in late.

 

Our staff team has a very broad age range and 'us older ones' are more than happy to cover for the young mums - they don't take advantage of it and only ask for special occasions.

 

I was fortunate to be a stay at home mum when mine were little and never had an issue attending any school event, I just went! Those occasions are great memories both for me and my sons and I am more than happy to work extra hours/days so that my colleagues can have the same experience.

 

I appreciate it's different in schools but have fingers crossed your head will say yes

[Tigger]

For some Head Teachers there hands are tied due to the new arrangements for covering classes. This mainly affects High Schools but some Primaries may have difficulties especially if there are not the resources to available for Supply.

 

S

[Rea]

Isnt it a shame that we are asked to encourage parental participation and yet we cant participate ourselves?

Could someone record it for you so you can watch it at home? I always gave staff time off after one christmas production I couldnt go to. Turned out my son was the only child without someone to go to at the end of the show.

If your head is thinking about it, start making provisional arrangements with your TA for your absence.

[Panders]

I'm pre-school - we only have the one production morning - and as many parents come along as possible. One of our local primaries used to put on one morning performance, one afternoon and one early evening performance. Some parents were unhappy with the evening performance times because their children were not following their usual routine and they felt they would be too tired etc........ however, when my boys took part in the evening performance they were very excited about going to school when it was dark etc. and thoroughly enjoyed it. The children could then go to school later the next morning.

 

I do hope you will be able to go along to see your daughter - these events are "rites of passage" I believe and as Geraldine has said, we do what we can to make sure the staff get to go to see their children whenever we can doing these special things, thank goodness daddy and nanny can go, she will have someone there for her and next best thing is for daddy to record as much as possible with your daughter as the star turn in the recording and have a very special viewing of it that night - popcorn, seating, tickets etc......

[dottyp]

I work in a sessional pre-school and have always said yes to staff attending their children's special events such as

sports days and christmas shows. I was a stay at home mum when my two children were small, but would have be devestated

if someone had told me I couldn't go! There is usually plenty of notice given for these events, so arranging cover has never

been an issue. Staff do however miss out on a sessions pay, but to miss your child's special event is priceless.

 

dottyp

[emmajess]

Hooray!!! My head said yes!! Phew! She was worried about future implications but I explained how I thought we could arrange t swap PPA time and things so that there wouldn't be any issue for the children's earning, and she agreed. Thank you for all your kind comments. You are a lovely lot of people!

Love from a very happy mum!

[Upsy Daisy]

That's lovely news. Well done. I hope you enjoy every minute of the play.

[emmajess]

I thought we could arrange t swap PPA time and things so that there wouldn't be any issue for the children's earning,

Oops - obviously I meant children's learning!

[Upsy Daisy]

and there were we thinking you'd got them all in a little sweatshop slaving away to pay your wages!

[emmajess]

and there were we thinking you'd got them all in a little sweatshop slaving away to pay your wages!