wellerkaren Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 Hi Jessica i feel for you , even tough i have never worked in a committee run nursery and from all your oposts i dont think i ever will. glad you havesome one to fight in your corner. Beth i hope you have some one to talk to about your problems, you need to share this with some one to help in order to keep your own health. I hope you both look after yourselves my thoughts are with you both Karen XxX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 Hi Jessica i feel for you , even tough i have never worked in a committee run nursery and from all your oposts i dont think i ever will. glad you havesome one to fight in your corner. Beth i hope you have some one to talk to about your problems, you need to share this with some one to help in order to keep your own health. I hope you both look after yourselves my thoughts are with you both Karen XxX Thanks Karen. It must work for some people, and I think there must be one or two very nice chairs/committee members who do actually do a good job of respecting their staff and the work they do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth1 Posted October 2, 2008 Share Posted October 2, 2008 Beth i hope you have some one to talk to about your problems, you need to share this with some one to help in order to keep your own health. I hope you both look after yourselves my thoughts are with you both Karen XxX Aww thanks Karen, well yes I have been 'talking to people' about the issues and is now looking better after I have talked to them. Feel like no one is going to walk all over me now!!!!! ANd they will be shocked about it aswell! Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Your right you do need to be strong but don't make yourself depressed or ill (anymore than you are) - if it really gets too much please remember to put yourself first, I honestly think I am still getting over it all and if I drive past the nursery I feel such a rush of emotions still. I feel tearful writing this - i don't know your personal circumstances but make sure you are a priority. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth1 Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Your right you do need to be strong but don't make yourself depressed or ill (anymore than you are) - if it really gets too much please remember to put yourself first, I honestly think I am still getting over it all and if I drive past the nursery I feel such a rush of emotions still. I feel tearful writing this - i don't know your personal circumstances but make sure you are a priority. I am feeling much better now I have spoken to the relvant people regarding my issues. I am hoping it will be resloved very soon and some help will be given for me. Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beau Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 I hope the committee can understand your reasons and begin to look at how to make things better - otherwise this pattern will be repeated all to often. Unfortunately Maz, you spend all your time and effort trying to make the committee understand and once they begin to they leave and you are back to square one again. I have got the largest flying moths in my stomach at the thought of telling them. I have no idea how they will respond. I have had two glasses of wine., have sat writing a letter about a dozen times and now I am going to relax while I make those paper planes for her grand exit. WhEEEEEEEEE I am wondering if you have told them today and if you have how you got on. I have butterflies in my stomach for you!! Good luck. Your right you do need to be strong but don't make yourself depressed or ill (anymore than you are) - if it really gets too much please remember to put yourself first, I honestly think I am still getting over it all and if I drive past the nursery I feel such a rush of emotions still. I feel tearful writing this - i don't know your personal circumstances but make sure you are a priority. :( I have been there too shirel with one particular episode and committee. For a time I even drove the long way around everywhere so that I didn't have to drive through the village because I was a nervous wreck as soon as I got anywhere near it. 3 years after it all happened I would still dissolve into tears if I spoke about it but luckily now I have been able to put it completely behind me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Jessica when I decide to hand in my notice I carried the letter in my bag for 3 days before I plucked up the courage to give it to the chair. She read it and walked away with a 'thanks'. She phoned me later full of shock she sid after the contents had sunk in. I worked a 7 month notice to give my deputy time to see what my role really was, but I didnt have any cares. It is a daunting thing to have to do, but hopefully now its done and you can satrt to have that feeling of relief start to land on you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Hi there Jessica, I understand very well what you have bee up against - our group is committee run and it comes with that whole bag of prolems called 'committee members'! Just today I had a parent asking about joining the committee and I just didn't have it in me to say 'yes, we need people like you, we need your help and there really isn't that much to it!' as I have previously done. Now I find I'm asking 'do you have any experience in education, employment law, accounting or the needs of staff and managers?' this is followed up by 'it can be difficult, there are sometimes disputes and you do need to offer time for meetings and to do the actual work'. Hmmmmm . . . I certainly wish you all the very best and your experience will take you far . .I think it is very well respected to have run a committee led pre-school as so many people are now aware of the difficulties of having a group of adults who are volunteering their time as employers. Big hugs and hope it all goes well - please do let us know how you get on x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Unfortunately Maz, you spend all your time and effort trying to make the committee understand and once they begin to they leave and you are back to square one again. So in effect, Beau - are you saying that committee-run groups are more trouble than they're worth? Its interesting that even when you hear someone say their committee is fabulous, they say it hasn't always been so - and most can recount some kind of nightmare scenario from the past. Has the model of parent-run pre-schools run its course - and if so what will take its place? Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Motherclanger Posted October 11, 2008 Share Posted October 11, 2008 Sorry this is a bit of a late reply, but i've had no internet for the last six weeks. I really know how you feel Jessica ! I resigned and left from a committee run pre-school at the end of the summer. I knew if I stayed any longer I was going to have a nervous breakdown ! It was a very difficult decision to make as I had been with the group as a parent, committee member and then as a supervisor, 18 years in all. The only trouble on the first day back of term I got a phone call begging me to come back for two weeks as my deputy who had taken over was finding it to stressful ! Me being me of course agreed, then after those two weeks I was told that the new staff members CRB forms had been lost in the post so they didn't have two members of staff to run the sessions who where CRBed and so was told if I didn't stay they would have to close on the Monday ! So no pressure ! I've now agreed to stay until half term and I'm only doing it for the lovely children that we've have, so they now have to find a new supervisor. I just hope they find someone quick because I know the paperwork has been neglected, few policies, no SEF, no staff contracts it goes on and on and they will never pass a new inspection. I tried so hard to get all these things implemented but couldn't do it on my own, the committee wern't interested or the other staff members it was a complete nightmare and still is ! In fact i'm being to get stressed again ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hali Posted October 11, 2008 Share Posted October 11, 2008 oh dear poor you - i hope they find a supervisor soon (but to be honest whos going to want to take all that on!) - try not to get too stressed hun xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 How are things jessica? Sorry I missed this post earlier, I can empathise in the difficult decision you have had to make, and sorry that it has had to come to this for you. My heart broke when I had to close my preschool, but now nearly a year on I have no regrets. I do miss certain aspects of it but I have also learnt that I am not indispensible, the group has re-started, with a new owner so the local children and families still have a preschool to access. However passionate we are it's really not worth risking your health for. I sometimes think that the passion stops us seeing the wood for the trees. Your family are concerned, which shows how really bad it has got for your health. It's been a week now, have you given your notice yet? Happymaz has voiced a good question, "Has the model of parent-run pre-schools run its course - and if so what will take its place? " I think many settings are asking themselves this. Take care of yourself. Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Ok.. just thought I would throw myself into this and let you know I too have just resigned fro the pre-school.. must be a spate of it around.. in my case after so long feel I need time to do a few me things.. and there are a few other things i would like to do which always seem to be on hold ..had some time over the summer to do some of the bits and now just want time to continue... All the best to everyone who is thinking of, or changing career paths...what ever the reason Inge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Ok.. just thought I would throw myself into this and let you know I too have just resigned fro the pre-school.. must be a spate of it around.. in my case after so long feel I need time to do a few me things.. and there are a few other things i would like to do which always seem to be on hold ..had some time over the summer to do some of the bits and now just want time to continue... All the best to everyone who is thinking of, or changing career paths...what ever the reason Inge Wow, Inge, talk about surprised. You've obviously done what you feel is rght for you and actually reading your post has changed the perspective.... When I read of people thinking of giving in their notice, it makes me feel sad, because I know the anxiety this decidion causes (being there myself before) Yet, when you step back it is actually JUST A CHANGE OF CAREER PATH, now that is a much more positive way to think of it. I think the stress of working in a place / job that is not good for the individual does make it hard to see the wood for the trees, so thanks for sharing, and showing that 'giving in ne's notice' is actually an exciting NEW way forward. Best wishes for your new career whatever, and where ever it may be. Keep us posted won't you. Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Thanks Peggy.. too addicted to give up here though! have always been told I see a glass as half full all the time, and must admit to not wanting to admit defeat in a challenge.. I will try every way possible before giving in.. My new career is ME... well and perhaps when I get a bit bored would like to do volunteer work.. for local hospice care or our toy library always need help too.. Inge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hali Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 oh wow Inge - your new career sounds wonderful well done you xxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aliamch Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Wow Inge, that's come as a bolt out of the blue! I sincerely hope you enjoy your 'me' time and I'm glad to hear you'll still be around to share your wisdom and wit. Karrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aliamch Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 (edited) Wow Inge, that's come as a bolt out of the blue! I sincerely hope you enjoy your 'me' time and I'm glad to hear you'll still be around to share your wisdom and wit. Karrie double post? is that the shock effect? Edited October 12, 2008 by aliamch Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beau Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Now I didn't see that one coming! Still, means that you can hang around the forum with the rest of us that don't have a job. Sometimes you need to be selfish in life and put your own priorities first - well done for taking the first difficult step and actually giving in your notice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth1 Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Wow Inge I didn't see that coming, enjoy your new career: YOU! Is there suddenly a spate of people leaving committee run pre-schools. Now I am wondering like Maz is there such a place for this type of childcare any more? Well I will ponder on like the rest of us. Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
louby loo Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Inge, Where was the job 'Me' advertised?? are the more vacances?? Well done you for taking the plunge!!! xxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth1 Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Inge,Where was the job 'Me' advertised?? are the more vacances?? Good question Louby loo, where are these such vancances! Beth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Inge, that's come as a surprise but good for you! Enjoy your "me" time, Nona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inge Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Came in the form of a surprise weekend away.. glorious weather and time to reflect on where i saw myself in a years time... having done this for so long i found myself wondering where I came into all of this and my long suffering husband as well... A sudden realisation that all my life had revolved around caring for others, nursing,, Army wife, mother, pre-school manager and all that entails.. that i got a bit lost in it all... Son is self sufficient and happy now so its a time to change direction.. but don't yet know where or how or if... I am in a lucky situation whereby my job was not vital income... so why? Had enough of jumping through hoops to please everyone else... and probably lots more... For me its not fed up with committee.. i have been soo lucky with committees over the years realising that they knew very little so took advice and followed it.... Now to the next chapter... well in the new year anyway... Inge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 What a brave decision Inge, you just enjoy yourself mind, I feel from your posts that it is a positive move and one that you have thought long and hard about, well done you have said it out loud and now you can move forward. You always have such useful comments and advice to give so don't you dare be a stranger! Prepare for the mix of emotions now finishing what you have started, - :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JacquieL Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 Well done Inge I really admire you for following your convictions. Actually I think looking after 'me' can be very challenging, as we can become defined by our various roles, and it takes courage to let go of some of these and open ourselves up to new experiences. What an exciting future lies ahead. I do hope you will keep contact with us all and tell us how you are doing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted October 12, 2008 Share Posted October 12, 2008 I have been reading these latter posts about taking stock and changing direction with envy and admiration. I have been through an experience in the last week that has made me really question whether owning and running a nursery is really what I should be doing, and whether I am paid enough to be under the level of pressure I have found myself under. Inge: I am full of admiration for the decision you have made - I feel sure it is the right one for you and that come the new year you will be ready for the challenges that lie ahead secure in the knowledge that you have made a good decision for the right reasons. As others have said you have such a lot to offer so even if your new job is not related to early years, I hope that we are one habit you won't give up! And perhaps you could find a different challenge within early years: it is sad to see such experience going out of the sector. Whatever you decide Inge, I wish you every success. In making your very personal decision you have given me much to think about: thank you! Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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