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Grandparents adding on extra sessions mum not happy !


HexPS
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We've had a mum come in today to complain that her In laws (who provide child care for her daughter) added on a session at preschool without her consent . The grandparents did indeed come in one day last week and request that the child stay for the lunch club and afternoon session and paid the required fee. The little girl happily stayed with us all day and the grandparents collected her at 3pm.

We thought nothing of this until the mum had complained today saying she didn't authorize this and that she should have been consulted. Now my stance was that she trusted the grandparents enough to childmind her for the day and that therefore she trusted them to make decisions about the child's activities during the day. Mum seems to think we should have a policy what do you all think. ?

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I'm pretty sure we don't ask parental permission when grandparents, childminders or other long term caters make arrangements. That would be up to them to discuss with the parent I'd say.

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I wouldn't have sought permission from a parent in that situation. There is no risk of it being detrimental to the child or the parents as long as the requester is paying.

When you are caring for other people's children you have to be allowed some authority to make decisions.

I would refer the parent back to the grandparents if she wants to take issue with their actions and inform her that you're happy that it is appropriate to accept a child for extra sessions when requested by the person caring for the child at that time.

If you had a policy that parents' permission had to be sought first, you may end up being unable to take a child to help out in a family emergency

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I think it's a conversation for mum and the grandparents!

 

You try to do your best and to be flexible and helpful but it's not your job or mine to check if mum is happy about everything grandparents ask...... Well not in this situation anyway!

 

I have a grandparent who often books her grandaughter in for extra sessions or breakfast club or Afterschool club....... It's not my job to check back then with mum I suppose I would have thought grandparent was booking child in because mum has asked her to!

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I have two grandmothers who regularly add extra hours for their grandchildren and the parents pay up quite happily. As the grannies are looking after the children whilst the parents work,I guess it's an arrangement that suits everyone............there are occasions where grany has other appointments, or is simply shattered after looking after the child. No complaints so far, but I would take the stance that if granny is in charge and deemed fit to make decisions, that's that. I guess if there was a huge hoo-ha over it, I would ask granny to pay for the extra time, but that has never happened yet

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what do you all think. ?

I think.......it's official the world has gone mad! :o

No way Jose would I be introducing any new policies........and agree with everyone else this is a family matter - can't believe this 'mum' has complained to you......

Will just add that as a 'granny' (nana) I have always 'run things by' my sons and my daughters-in-law when I've been caring for their children - e.g.. we have just decided we might go (wherever) is it OK to take (whichever) with us......their reaction to date has always been "yes, of course, you don't need to check with us" - so with that in mind I wouldn't have been booking extra pre-school/nursery time without asking - but that's just me :rolleyes:

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Had a very similar arrangement at our setting - only met parent at initial registration when he came in to sign the forms due to parental responsibility being his. He made clear at that point that granny would be our point of contact and gave permission for that - it worked very well; we only ever saw granny who arranged all sessions herself. We didn't and still don't have an actual policy for this as it was a bit of a one off, we just added a line to the registration docs so that everyone was clear!

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Thanks everyone, it was one of those situations where I knew what we where saying was right but wanted to know everyone else would too !! Funnily enough I tried to call her the next day as shed originally spoken to my deputy but was trying to play us off however after two attempts she didn't answer. Should be interesting to see if she returns in the new term !

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I agree that a policy is going too far - how many do we already have!! you can't have a policy for everything!

 

However, I have to go against everyone else's view and say that I would have checked with the parents..... You wouldn't enrol a child on the grandparents request would you? and it is just a quick phone call surely? out of politeness? just my view.......

 

On a reverse note, we had a child not turn up one morning - and when we spoke to mum later on she was horrified! She had no idea grandma had kept the child at home......

 

OOOhhhh - it's not like me to go against the grain....

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We regularly have grandparents dropping off and one does often ask if they can stay later and pays, she collects too. If they are dropping off I would not check with parents as they are responsible for the child at that time? I could understand it more if they were booking in for lots of extras and parents were expected to pick up the bill!!!

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  • 2 weeks later...

We regularly have grandparents dropping off and one does often ask if they can stay later and pays, she collects too. If they are dropping off I would not check with parents as they are responsible for the child at that time? I could understand it more if they were booking in for lots of extras and parents were expected to pick up the bill!!!

agree with this and since grandparents paid and there wasn't really any issue with the child being upset it seems a private discussion at home would be the answer.

Maybe parent was actually upset about something else?

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