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Facing My Fears


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Hi everyone - need some help - as usual xD


I really have got to face my fear of spiders - especially as we are in the process of emigrating to a very, very hot place with an enormous array of crawlies. :o


The thought of hypnotherapy leaves me petrified I am going to do something silly like act like a chicken everytime I hear a certain noise. (watched too many hypnotist shows in years gone by!!!!)


Can anyone recommend a book or another technique I can use? Has anyone out there found something that's helped them?


Unfortunately my dad thought it was hilarious to chase me with with spiders when I was little - definitely wouldn't be allowed these days, I'm sure! :(

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oh bless you Pickle i do symphasise - i myself have had to over a fear of them for my daughter - who is terrified - i hasten to add i have always been very brave around her with the little creatures and i will remove with a glass and paper!!! - but she is absolutly petrified of the tiniest thing....... my mum up until recently (ex school teacher - has always tutted !!!) but she has a real phobia andit is very hard to overcome - sorry much help to you!!!


where are you going by the way !!! - must be worth putting up with the creepies!!!!!b

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Heading to Oz - hopefully, but is a long process so have time to do battle with the phobia


Went for a visit and was hoping to see a few just to reassure myself I can live alongside them - did I see even one....did I heck!


Puts into perspective the fact that I have nothing to worry about over here now - THEY can't kill me :o

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My sister is a qualified hypnotherapist, and does a lot of work with people with phobias. She said success rates are very high. Sometimes there's no need for hypnotherapy, using NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) you can overcome many fears, even the dentist! Worth looking into, see if there's someone who does NLP near you

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Can't really help other than to say the only thing that got me over my fear was like hali- my own daugter, I was so deternined that she was not going to have the fear I had...that somehow I seem to have cured myself -again like hali to the point where I can remain calm and do the class and paper thing.....


Good luck with starting your new adventure down-under



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I agree with Cait- the type of hypnotherapy you may have experienced in the past seems to be a purely entertainment one and not that of true professionals who would never make you anything as crass as being a chicken!

My friend recently tried NLP to overcome her lifetime fear of flying in order to visit pre-schools in another country. It worked for her so it might for you.

Good luck I hope you can find a way to overcome your phobia

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Thank you for the comments - I will definitely look into the NLP - it's not something I have heard of.


Although I have made a joke about it - I think I am most worried about feeling I'm not in control of my actions.


Having said that, I realise that I have to be proactive in getting help with this or I fear it will over-ride everything else during my time in Oz.


Thanks all :o

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hypnotherapy as a treatment you do remain in control of your actions..I did when I needed it briefly for a sleep problem.... it is more a case of relaxing you to be able to be receptive to overcome the fear / issue ..


nothing at all like the stage shows you will have seen in the past...



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Depending on how strong your phobia is, ie: does it induce panick attacks? at what level etc?


Self help or professional, good suggestions already on both routes.


My Foster daughter, age 6 yrs (of whom I don't know history of past experiences with spiders) appeared very, very distressed when her older brothers teased he with a spider. I took a firm but calm approach, she was screaming in her bedroom even though her brothers had left her, the very small spider was on the carpet. I first told her kind but assertively to stop screaming. I then got a sandwich box (like the CLEAR containers you get from take aways) and placed the spider in it with the lid on.

I encouraged her to carry the box down to the kitchen, this took about 5 minutes with gentle coaxing. Once in the kitchen I held the box and talked about how scared the spider was being shut up in the box, (this next bit would only work with children I suppose) I asked my daughter did she think the spider was sad being shut in the box etc. I then got a magnifying glass and asked my daughter to look closley (still with the lid on) at the spider to see if it was crying. I then continued in this vain and step by step worked towards taking the lid off, remaining calm to her responses, held the spider myself, then gently encouraged her to again look at the spider through the magnifyer, then to touch the spiders leg (be careful not to break it he's so small and fragile) and eventually she let me place the spider on her hand. (it appeared very tired now and didn't move too much).


Her face when she achieved this was great to see, a mix of trepidation and pride (at her bravery).

I continued to talk about how timid, tiny, fragile, (and lots more descriptive words that helped her see that the spider was not a threat) etc the spider was. I then said, 'lets show Dad how brave you are' and she scooted off down the hall, spider on her hand, calling out to dad' a smile beaming across her face.


I then told her that now her brothers could never tease her again, she took the spider to show her brothers and Lo and behold the 12 yr old ran away from her. Guess who else is scared of spiders and he wouldn't let me do the de-scensity (spl) activty with him. (scared to lose face I suppose if he fails).


She has since reverted to screeming if she see's a spider, but when reminded she isn't scared anymore she's ok. So, with her it is breaking the habit of 'initial response' as much as having helped her to overcome her fear.


Her brothers did tell me that their mum was very scared of spiders.


I do hope you overcome your phobia. I have heard that starting with looking at and touching photo's pictures of things you are phobic about is a good starting point.



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Hi Peggy - thanks for all the advice.


I don't have panic attacks and after having my son, I am now able to do the cup and paper trick. (Like others, I did not want to pass on my fears.)


BUT there is absolutely no way I could have one on my body - that thought makes me go rigid with fear xD


I think I am most afraid of the fact that in Oz, even the smallest spiders are quite deadly.


The worrying thing is that over here, I absolutely cannot be in the same room as a spider and will leave the house or go upstairs if the thing is too big for me to handle. (and wait for hubby to come home :o )


I realise that that is not a sensible option for Oz and have now been looking seriously into hypnotherapy/counselling sessions.


Thanks for all the advice - will update everyone as I go x

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