Guest Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 He left home at 20 yrs to live with his girlfriend Hayley, after 2 yrs he decided he was too young to settle. Then he met Vanessa, two years living with her and then.............. today I get the call. "Can I come home Mum, we've split up". Picking him up in half an hour. Mixed feelings, although it is him ending the relationship, he is still sad, I feel sad for him too, and Vanessa who is a lovely girl. However, I have missed him, over the last 4 yrs every time I saw him he was with his girlfriend. It used to be just me and him, up to age 12 yrs, when I was a single parent, so in a sense I am looking forward to some me time with him ( is that selfish??) His old room is currently occupied by one our Foster lads, so he will be in the guest room. Already started thinking in mother mode, How will he get to work? How long will he be with us? How will he cope without having girlfriend to 'taxi' him around everywhere? Will he be out late at night with his mates, coming in at all hours? As it happens, since I got home from work I have only heard them playing 'love songs' on the radio. . Currently playing " I will survive" . I feel all sad for him and protective too. Ah bless. Peggy Quote
Marion Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 I think its all in a mum's job description enjoy spoiling him Quote
Sue R Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 Oh, Peggy!! Have only nursed my son through one serious break up, but that was bad enough!! Sending supportive and loving vibes, hope you can pick them up. Don't we just bleed for our children when they're down - still, with a mum like you I'm sure he'll survive ..... maybe your 'lads' will benefit from his presence? ........ Just a thought...? Take care, Sue xx Quote
JacquieL Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 Enjoy being with him, listen, and provide the non-judgemental support which I know is what you are expert at. What a compliment it is to you as a mother that, after all this time, he feels that he can come home and is sure of a loving welcome. Quote
Guest tinkerbell Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 i think you have a special bond with your son peggy. Enjoy him . Tinkerbellx Quote
Beau Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 So sorry for your son Peggy, but how nice that he can come home to you. Quote
Guest Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 Hi Peggy, I have 2 'boys' aged 23 and 25 and they have never left home! Well, the older one did briefly for a couple of months but missed the dogs. I hope you have enjoyed the 'smelly washing free years' and not being woken up at all hours when they come home (with friends male or female)! Not to mention all that extra shopping and cooking.... Seriously though Peggy, I hope you enjoy having your son back and that he gets over his break up alright. Best wishes. Quote
Guest Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 Love him, cherish him and do what you do Peggy, he's a lucky boy/man!! Enjoy your time with him - this is what life is about isn't it. Quote
Guest Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 Home safe and sound, he's grown up quite a bit, had a shower within 10 mins of getting in, and is now cooking his own snack Thank you all for your lovely words. Logging off now to give him some 'quality time' Peggy Hi Peggy, I have 2 'boys' aged 23 and 25 and they have never left home! Well, the older one did briefly for a couple of months but missed the dogs. I hope you have enjoyed the 'smelly washing free years' and not being woken up at all hours when they come home (with friends male or female)! Not to mention all that extra shopping and cooking.... Seriously though Peggy, I hope you enjoy having your son back and that he gets over his break up alright. Best wishes. fortunately since Ellis was 12 yrs, and I got married, his step dad ( hubby) has done all the washing, shopping and cleaning, and waiting up for them ( Ellis and 2 others) to come home. I'm a very lucky lady Peggy Quote
narnia Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 enjoy the time with him Peggy, had this with my oldest son some time ago..........he was heartbroken and to this day he can't talk about what happened.He is now VERY happily married an the father of two beautiful little girls, who are the centre of my heart (along with my two other grandchildren!)..............lucky lad that he has you to go "home" to! Quote
Andreamay Posted January 15, 2007 Posted January 15, 2007 I have 3 sons of similiar age peggy and 2 have had their heart broken before with the youngest engaged to his girlfriend 4 years ago when he was 14!!!! I dread to think what the future holds for them,we always remember our firsts love dont we? 2 of them are still at home the eldest went and then came back again,altho they all help their dad on the farm occasionally so see lots of them. Im sorry but I CANT WAIT till they all go!! Sorry ive said it now no going back. Good luck and enjoy Quote
Rea Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 Hope his first night home has been good for all of you. Poor lad, does he reaslise how many of us are 'clucking' over him? I asked Sam (16) yesterday if he's got a girlfriend yet, to which he answered 'No, they're boring' So I'm luckily not going to have to deal with that for a while at least. Richard (14) doesnt want a girlfriend because they cost too much and he wants to save his money to become a millionaire. Quote
narnia Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 tell him, once he's found the right girl, he'll FEEL like a millionaire! Quote
Deb Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 Feel for our sons, so much to learn! My 18 year old spends most of this time with his girlfriend, inlcuding most nights and I miss him. It was lovely to have him stay Christmas Eve, think he did it for us not the stocking! Makes you appreciate your time with them, and the others who will also fly the nest but not for a while yet. Peggy your son will no doubt be very well cared for, I wish him well. Deb Quote
Inge Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 Its one of the best things, allowing them to go and make their own way but realising that they still come home when they feel the need and that they want to come home. Inge Quote
Guest MaryEMac Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 My son got married in 2005 but had left home to live with his wife for at last 18 mths before this. He still rings up for advice or a chat once a week and I see him at weekends when I get asked to look after his little girl while he plays football. he had one big break-up when he was 18 and it nearly broke my heart to see him so upset but I did what all mums do and just listened and fed him. I've done that once with my daughter as well but at 28 she's decided that men arn't the be all and end all. Your son will be okay Peggy, especially with all of us on the case Mary Quote
Guest Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 Peggy just had to say what a chord your story struck! my elder son left home at 18 when he went to uni and then he moved miles away for his first job at Bristol. His girlfriend moved from Bournemouth to be near him last February and they finally got together in August. Yesterday he went for an interview at the local university to be an assistant manager at the big student union there and he got the job and his girlfriend got offered a job in the same city, just before he went in for his interview. He only came home twice last year and now he's moving 10 minutes away. I am so pleased for them both. It is a lot cheaper to live here and they were having to cope with the smallest of flats in Bristol. Quote
Guest Posted January 16, 2007 Posted January 16, 2007 I have 3 sons of similiar age peggy and 2 have had their heart broken before with the youngest engaged to his girlfriend 4 years ago when he was 14!!!! I dread to think what the future holds for them,we always remember our firsts love dont we? 2 of them are still at home the eldest went and then came back again,altho they all help their dad on the farm occasionally so see lots of them. Im sorry but I CANT WAIT till they all go!! Sorry ive said it now no going back. Good luck and enjoy I married my first love, we were together when I was 14 yrs, he joined the army, then a lifetime later ( 20 yrs) We got together again and married 7 yrs ago. Peggy Hope his first night home has been good for all of you. Poor lad, does he reaslise how many of us are 'clucking' over him? I asked Sam (16) yesterday if he's got a girlfriend yet, to which he answered 'No, they're boring' So I'm luckily not going to have to deal with that for a while at least. Richard (14) doesnt want a girlfriend because they cost too much and he wants to save his money to become a millionaire. I must admit I did show him the posts last night, so yes, he does know we are all clucking He broke off the relationship because he feels the need to be independent and not 'looked after' which previous girlfriends have done. I am proud of the way he handled it though, being honest and truthful with his ex, not leading her on to false promises of a future. Peggy Quote
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