mrsbat Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 We have 3 year old twins - boy and girl - and the boy struggles at circle time, he will constantly run round and round the room and laughs thinking it is a game if any of us try to get him to come and sit down. The situation is that we are a packaway setting and 2 days a week we finish at 1, some children leave at 12 and some stay for lunch then leave at 1, this little one stays for lunch and typically the children sit down just after 12 and lunch normally finishes between 12.30 and 12.40. We HAVE to get the children sitting down for an amount of time which enables us to clear away etc in time for the children to go and be out of the hall ready for the next hirers. Now in my opinion the less attention he receives for the 'negative' behaviour the better, I also praise his twin sister for sitting nicely which regularly results in him coming to sit down for a few minutes - which I also praise him for. Unfortunately though when he starts running around a couple of the other children now also follow and they have never displayed this behaviour before. The ideas I have had are to either scrap or shorten story time and do something physical instead for a while, move into a smaller room with less room to run around to do story etc from there. We have tried bringing a favourite action figure in from home for the child to hold only if he stays sitting down, I have bought some action figure cards to try giving one at a time when he is sitting down, we have left a rug and box of toys out for him to choose whether to sit or go and play with and like I said we have tried the ignoring too which sometimes works but he will also go and play with the plug switches etc which we just can't allow. I really want to get a play plan together so all staff are 'singing from the same sheet' and in all honesty I do feel like some staff members just feel he should be able to sit for a while or not stay for lunch! Thinking about it the other day I had never realised how long we were expecting them to sit for as we normally sit for a story by around 11.40, then some children go and some start lunch at 12ish then after lunch they sit for story again - so almost 1 and a half hours which is just unacceptable for 3-4 years olds. I've had the comment that it's unfair to change how things are done just for 1 child but in my opinion it is our job to cater for ALL children so if he doesn't 'fit in' with what we do then we need to find a way that he can - by changing things to include him. Has anyone got any other ideas we could try or things that could be put on the play plan just to help this little one to feel included? Quote
Cait Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 Is there something he can do elsewhere? When I had this, one member of staff took the child away from the group to get cups out or to dry snack dishes, have a solo story or even just to walk round the garden. It was done straight away before we sat for story and once a week we tried him back, or asked if he wanted to go and sit for story. The other children didn't question where he went, just enjoyed the ability to sit and listen without interruption. We didn't see it as excluding him, or it being a Star Trek 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one', just because he wasn't included in a group thing didn't mean that he wasn't enjoying a better (for him) experience elsewhere. 1 Quote
finleysmaid Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 How many of you need to supervise lunch? could most of the team be clearing the space during the time that the children are quiet eating lunch? This way you would then have a space to do something physical whilst the lunch team clear the rest of the hall. I don't really think that your current system is working for any of your children (as you have identified in your post) so this isn't a case of changing it for him ...it's changing it for the benefit of everyone (including the staff who are obviously annoyed by his behaviour!) . ABC does has some interesting thoughts about 'containment' of children rather than fun and learning! 2 Quote
Panders Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 I recognise this child's behaviour in one of our little girls at the moment who screams and kicks off after lunch if we try to co-coerce her into taking part in a story-time. She has been with us since September and it has always been so. She is now 41 months old. She has certainly started off other children running round in circles screaching etc., We are packaway and a couple of years ago changed from 2 storytimes so those leaving before lunch club got a storytime too. We changed storytime to just before tidyup time at 11 followed by snack and then outdoor play then back in for lunch club, all children still got a story, if they wanted! We find our tricky little girl copes well with storytime at the earlier slot, but if we try another storytime just before they all go home after lunch she is far too over tired to sit and listen again.and would rather go to the opposite end of the hall and play in the kitchen, however, this does escalate occasionally and she does silly things like trying to use the climbing frame again when it is all packed up, so rather dangerous, she used to do it to get adult attention, - you can imagine the scene - however, she rarely does it now, but we do allow her to do as she wishes, quietly, and it "works". Quote
mrsbat Posted February 7, 2015 Author Posted February 7, 2015 Thanks all for the advice - I agree with you all! I guess I needed that 'boost' or agreement from others in the same situation to actually put my foot down and say 'this is what we're doing from now on'............. Fingers crossed! 1 Quote
Guest Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 Nothing worse is there having a sister who behaves and probably gets praised all the time, perhaps lower your expectations, dies not matter if he does not join circle time a member of staff could sit with him at the trains or cars or dough eventually you can bring him over to join the circle perhaps with a car a train or dough Give him some responsibility like putting on the dates for the calendar, placing our active kids vouchers in the pot or can you help ....to find his name, carry my keys complete the register Can he not eat his lunch picnic style on the floor? You have to make adjustments for children that cannot conform to what you believe is not appropriate. What is his behaviour at home? His development is going to be different from his sister, boys lag behind girls. Boys struggle to sit some more than others, he needs to support to strengthen his core muscles and someone to help him achieve. Just make his steps achievable and small Good luck Quote
Guest Posted February 7, 2015 Posted February 7, 2015 Sorry I but I just wondered whether you need to shorten your lunch time that the children are there? Giving you time to attend to the children rather than tidying away may have a better impact on your child's behaviour, once they have gone then all staff tidy and pack away. Children always seem to see when things are busy and those that struggle with boundaries are the ones that often think great lets go! Having been a packaway setting I know how hard it is when you are trying to care for children and do the jobs needed, but the children must come first. Could you possibly finish lunch at 12.30pm and the children then go home, it would give you time to talk to any straggling parents and then clear away. 20 minutes for a story for 3 and 4 year olds is far too long and I can understand your little chaps frustration. Good luck, changing the teams attitude sometimes is the biggest barrier to being able to meet the children's needs so I do feel for you. Quote
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