Melba Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Does anyone have experience of this? It is likely to be adopted by the school where our setting is located and I am wondering if it is in anyway appropriate for preschoolers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Melba - I don't even know what it is........would love to hear more...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 I thinks it involves the victim and the perpetrator getting together and talking about what happened. But there's probably a much fuller explanation! I think pre-schooler's could manage it, obviously you'd know which one's would understand, but if it was done in a very simple way its no different I suppose to when we explain to a child how his actions have hurt someone, you'd just be taking it a step further with the hurt child being involved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melba Posted October 24, 2012 Author Share Posted October 24, 2012 Don't know much myself, I'm afraid but it seems to be a system that allows a child who has behaved badly (bullying) to apologise to the victim instead of being formally punished (exclusion). I'm sure that is far too simplistic but that is why I am asking for information myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 I thinks it involves the victim and the perpetrator getting together and talking about what happened. But there's probably a much fuller explanation! I think pre-schooler's could manage it, obviously you'd know which one's would understand, but if it was done in a very simple way its no different I suppose to when we explain to a child how his actions have hurt someone, you'd just be taking it a step further with the hurt child being involved. Thanks Rea - I suspect that I should have known - has been a long day! :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Don't know much myself, I'm afraid but it seems to be a system that allows a child who has behaved badly (bullying) to apologise to the victim instead of being formally punished (exclusion). I'm sure that is far too simplistic but that is why I am asking for information myself. Oh - thanks Melba - hmmm - I shall have a little think about that.......I'm not really sure that I think that's a brilliant idea.......but will follow this with interest...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melba Posted October 24, 2012 Author Share Posted October 24, 2012 I feel that it might be a bit hard on the victim sometimes. And, as Rea says, we are doing a version of this anyway and I feel it is better to suit your response to the event and not be too formal about it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 If the bully has to appologise to the victim, what about those children who refuse to say sorry, either because they genuinely don't want to or who haven't got the understanding or who are just too confused by the whole thing? I saw a child being sat out of play by two 'practitioners' because he wouldn't say sorry to someone. It was agonising to see. I presume there would be an 'out' in this situation so it doesn't become a stalemate? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Or the child who thinks he can do what he likes because he will say sorry. ( Not always boys either!) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sunnyday Posted October 24, 2012 Share Posted October 24, 2012 Or the child who thinks he can do what he likes because he will say sorry. ( Not always boys either!) Yes absolutely - I rarely ask anyone to say sorry for this very reason......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upsy Daisy Posted October 25, 2012 Share Posted October 25, 2012 Yes absolutely - I rarely ask anyone to say sorry for this very reason......... Nor me. I prefer to ask the child who has upset the other how the victim night be feeling and to think of something they (or we) could do to make up for it. Is that restorative justice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted October 25, 2012 Share Posted October 25, 2012 I'm very interested to learn more about this restorative justice idea - who decides on the sanction and does the 'victim' have to agree with the method and 'severity' of the sanction - saying sorry might not be appropriate or make the 'victim' feel better. High/Scope has devised a strategy for dealing with children's conflicts which is based around giving children the skills they need to resolve their own conflicts supported by an adult. Each party is encouraged to tell the adult what has happened, with the adult mediating and reframing the problem to help each party understand what has happened. Then the adult asks each party how they think it can be resolved. There follows a procedure of negotiating until they reach some kind of compromise which allows both parties to move on and put the episode behind them. The procedure is time consuming but it ensures each party's feelings are listened to and understood by the other, and that children become the authors of their own solutions rather than having adults swooping in, taking over and delivering their own sanctions. After a short period the adults find the children become expert in either resolving their problems themselves, or that other children not involved in the incident take on the role of mediator. I think it is important that whatever method the whole school uses (and if you're expected to adopt the same systems with the youngest children) it has to be tweaked and amended so that it meets your children's individual needs and is age/stage appropriate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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