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Tapestry

A Joke


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Heard this during our last inspection, it made me chuckle :o

 

There was a farmer in a field with his sheep. A woman approached him, “if I tell you how many sheep you have in your field will you give me any sheep of my choosing” she said. “Yes” he said “I will”.

The woman went back to her car working out the numbers on her laptop. A few hours later she came back, “you have 1,527 sheep” she said, “That’s correct you can choose any sheep you want” said the farmer. On her way out of the field the farmer said “if I tell you what job you do will you give me back what you have taken?” “Why yes” she said.

“You are an OFSTED inspector” he said, “Wow! How did you know” said the lady

“Well you came uninvited, you told me what I already knew and by the way give me my bloody dog back.

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I once heard this one too...sorry can't type all of it as it contains swearing but I'm sure you'll guess the words!

What's the difference between a plastic surgeon and an OFSTED inspector?

One tucks up features and the other ***** up teachers!

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  • 1 month later...

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

 

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

 

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

 

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!!!"

 

 

"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom.

 

 

Are you ready for this?

Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"

 

 

Oh for goodness sake... laugh, or at least groan. Life's too short not to enjoy...even these silly little cute..... and clean jokes

 

Sounds to me like she's been "sweeping" around!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

 

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

 

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

 

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!!!"

"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom.

Are you ready for this?

Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.

"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"

Oh for goodness sake... laugh, or at least groan. Life's too short not to enjoy...even these silly little cute..... and clean jokes

 

Sounds to me like she's been "sweeping" around!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:o very funny Marion.....you have just made me laugh out loud!!!

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