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To share or not to share? That is a question!


FSFRebecca
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I read David Cahn's article about our expectations of sharing in the EYFS. It's a really interesting piece and got me thinking. At our nursery we use sand timers and the 'we've got more than one of most things' approach to sharing. Following reading the article I'm wondering if we are helping or hindering the children in our care ... what do you think? You do need to sign up to the TES, but it is free :)

https://www.tes.com/news/why-we-should-not-force-children-eyfs-share

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At last a sensible suggestion re sharing.  I have for a long time HATED the egg-timer approach to 'sharing', which is always endorsed by the Advisors!  I think it just teaches children that they can have what they want when they want it when actually this is not real life.  I have always worked with 2-4 year olds and teach them to ask the children that has got it ' can I have a turn after you'.  I support this to ensure the child with the toy knows that they don't have to give it up immediately.  I say to the child wanting the item '...….. knows you are waiting' .  I monitor the situation to ensure that it happens.  9 times out of 10 the child hands over the toy without any problems, if they don't  I might support them to do this depending on what it is.  

I feel that this approach: 

teaches the children to talk to each other

gives the children the skills to resolve this themselves 

helps the children to realise they can't have everything they want when they want it 

 

I find it works well with even the youngest children and it just seems a more kinder, empowering approach.   Would you want to give up your laptop, pen, mug of tea when you were using it just because someone else wanted it! 

What does everyone else do?

 

 

 

 

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Interesting article and I agree with some of the ideas however we need to make a distinction between turn taking and sharing. Taking turns means that you will get the item back at some point. sharing is not expecting it to be returned. There is a huge difference in development between the two things. Children may be able to take turns especially if this is 'supported' turn taking from 2 and a half, sharing developmentally comes in at around 4/4 and a half. This is not to say that children with the right support can't learn this earlier but I wouldn't be concerned about it before then.

One of the other issues that happens is lack of resources (especially if finances are limited) we find that there is a magic number of 6 for us, (group of 30) we have 3 the same 2 the same 1 the same!!! so three blue spades 2 red spades one yellow spade. for instance this seems to sort out most issues! we talk a lot about how to use our words to sort out issues but again this has to be developmentally and linguistically appropriate

Just my tuppence worth!xD

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I agree that sharing and turn-taking are two different things and are skills acquired at different times.  Our pre-schoolers (3&4) are currently in the habit of saying  "X isn't sharing" when what they mean is "X is playing with it.  I want it and X won't give it to me"!  We work in the same way as Diesel10 and really encourage children to talk to each other and resolve the problem themselves as much as they/we can.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Not 100% sure I agree with the idea that a timer isn't realistic. Adults regularly have to stick to using something for a set amount of time. To say that children shouldn't have to because adults don't really experience that isn't entirely accurate, is it? I agree in principle that children should be taught different ways to share but I also believe that they should be taught about real life situations where fairness doesn't always appear to come into it - at least fairness in our own/a child's eyes. Fairness for one often doesn't look the same as fairness to another.

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