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Good evening,




I am new to Nursery and all this toilet training stuff and I am hoping that you will be able to share your knowledge and experience with me.


I have a three year old that has just started with us doing five mornings a week. He is in pull ups and although he is dry, he soils every morning.


I have read that we shouldn't be constantly asking if they need to go to the toilet as this inhibits developing the feeling of needing to go to the toilet. However, what strategies would you suggest that we can put into place to help and support this child.


I am thinking that we should be checking him every so often and occasionally asking if he needs to go to the toilet. However, I am totally in the dark and would welcome any advice or strategies.


Many thanks


Mel C

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This is a good site for this type of thing.


As I return to pre-school, I am hoping that a boy due to turn 4 in October has managed to become potty trained during the summer hols, which his parents assured me they would be putting their mind to! Sometimes he would have a dirty nappy 3 times in a morning.. He appears to be unaware of any feeling or urge to go, and I can't even get him to tell me when he had done a dirty nappy, he is so unaware, it would seem.


He has a few other sensory problems, and he has a chaotic home life, inasmuch, that he has a few transitions per day after he leaves us when he is looked after by different members of his extended family while both parents work days and nights.

Edited by Panders
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ah welcome to the world of toilet training....such joy!!

Top tips.....

don't ask if he would like to go the toilet! I would suggest you say something like go and have a try on the toilet and then we will do xxxx. This way there is a motivation to doing it...most boys when asked will say they don't need to go even when they are bursting!

Get him out of pull ups asap ...if he is toilet trained for wees this won't help.

Time him! does he go at a fairly regular time each day (often creatures of habit) If he's an 11 o clock guy then you can keep an eye on him....children are often easy to spot who are just about to have a poo...they may hide/go quiet/squat etc watch out for the signs

Try and catch him at the right time and take to the loo ...maybe with a book or sing to him or chat about what he likes. Make sure he is comfortable and try to keep his knees higher than his bottom (small step...your knees...depending on height of loo!)

put paper in the loo to avoid splashing

let him see whats in the loo ...flush it and maybe wave goodbye :rolleyes: ::1a

REWARD for effort ...have short tries and then come back if you need to make it exciting and rewarding. It takes time and effort but once cracked is a very useful skill ;) remember health and self care have almost as many learning outcomes to 'achieve' as writing! :P

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Thank you Finleysmaid. I did wonder about the pull ups as everything I have read - in my newly acquired getting it right for two year olds and child development book - recommends getting out of pull ups.


Wish me luck.

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