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I have a child in Reception who refuses to speak to adults but is fine with the other children. She has had a difficult background, so obviously this will contribute.

She does as she is told and talks all the time at home, but now that she has been in my class for over a term and still not answeriing the register, it is concerning. She won't come out during carpet session not even to do something on the interactive whiteboard yet she is very confident with the other childre. It is difficult to collect evidence for her profile, and the only thing I can think to do is ask her parents to come in and hear her wordboxes, and do some of the profile tasks with her. It is however very difficult. An educational psychologist has said she has Elective Mutism. I am worried about how she can develop at school, as she continues not to talk.

She was the same at nursery and they tried for a year without success to communicate with her.

I have spoken to her at lunch time on a one to one basis about her food, but it's one word, and in class she even refuses to do that! I have an I.E.P and she is starting to nod her head - sometimes. She doesn't say please and thankyou for snacks, etc. which the other children comment on! I am hoping that before she starts in Year 1 that she will be able to talk. If anyone has come across this before or has any suggestions for me to try I would like to hear from you.

Thanks.

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Hi Beckyann

 

I've known a few children who appear to have 'elective mutisum' (can't spell!). They all appear very happy in the setting they were in. I have known one child who wouldn't talk at all whilst at nursery and i don't think i ever heard her say more than two words whilst she was in my group. I talked to her parents and they said she never stopped talking at home and we're not concerned. Another child had a good group of friends, was very happy, talked quite alot to her friends and occassionally talked to staff. She would join in songs, but wouldn't speak out during circle time, register or snack. So we didn't get please or thank you either.

 

I was advised to just encourage her, without making too much of a fuss about it and see what happened.

 

Not a huge lot of help though, sorry :o

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hi Beckyann we had a child in nursery who didn't want to speak. She spoke to me once but when I reported this back to mum the little girl was furious snd never spoke again! Over the year she began to communicate with eye contact, she would wave at register time and eventually began to mouth words while we were singing (only if adults weren't looking though!)

She too was VERY chatty at home.

Now she is in the Reception class and communication has not improved. She is an extremely confident and happy so I guess there is not much more we can do except support and Nurture her.

Our Ed psych seemed to think we were doing the right thing and her IEP consists of the things that we are NOT to do to make her feel uncomfortable.

In short,I think everyone agrees, as long as she is happy..which she is try to leave well alone. Hard in our job I know!!

 

wheeldon

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Have you tried talking to her, indirectly, through a puppet? Sometimes children find this less threatening.

I would definitely agree that you shouldn't put pressure on the little girl and she will start talking when she is ready. I had twins who were very similar in their behaviour and by the end of YR they would whisper answers to the register but were highly gregarious with their friends in informal situations.

It is hard for you with the profile, but you can only record what you can evidence - maybe you could find alternative ways of getting evidence? Getting the parents involved, as you suggest, is one way. Could you engineer a game with some of your more able readers to assess her reading ability?

Good luck :D

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I had a little girl in Rec a couple of years ago who wouldn't speak - she would play alongside a small group of friends, but still rarely spoke - the children never commented on this. It was only when her grandmother got a puppy and I began to talk about my dog and took in photos to show her that she began to show increased signs of confidence. I can still remember the day - in March - when she answered the register for the first time, I don't know who was more surprised - me, the other children or her :o

 

Good luck, I think the best thing is not to put any pressure on her.

 

Harricroft.

 

Is it always girls?????????

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There was a similar topis around this subject in nursery settings a while ago, cannot find it at present but I remember adding about my son who was like this....a long time ago now!!

 

He never spoke to anyone at pre-school for nearly 18 months. At home I could not stop him talking. He appeared extremely confident in every area and would do all they asked joined in well with other children but did not speak. he was very shy in this aspect, and we felt he was scared or worried about getting things wrong, or not perfect, so better to listen than get it wrong. he was always happy in new environments, left me with no worries, confident in his ability except in speach.

 

Eventually he began to talk with them but they had to gain his trust and not force the issue and it was only single word mumbled.

 

every year he had a new teacher at school. he had to really trust them before opening up to them and this often took until the summer term. He would hide behind his hands everytime anyone spoke to him, asked him a question or wanted him to do anything. with the children they saw he was very articulate, and always had friendsto play with.

 

He was lucky in that the school recognised his difficulty with new adults and by end year 1 he was able to be put in a mixed yr 1/2 class with the same teacher for 2 years.

he never looked back, and is now an extremely confident young man who will happily stand up in front of hundreds of stangers give a talk or presentation and not actually get nervous, and is in 3rd year at Uni.

 

It worked by not insisting or making him seem any different to his peers or forcing the issue. Discuss this with parent at a time when the child is not with them . in this way you will be able to know the progress at home, and hopefully reassure you that the child is progressing.

 

note- In my sons case puppets etc did not work he just became scared of them!!!

 

Inge

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There was a similar topis around this subject in nursery settings a while ago, cannot find it at present but I remember adding about my son who was like this....a long time ago now!!

 

He never spoke to anyone at pre-school for nearly 18 months. At home I could not stop him talking. He appeared extremely confident in every area and would do all they asked joined in well with other children but did not speak. he was very shy in this aspect, and we felt he was scared or worried about getting things wrong, or not perfect, so better to listen than get it wrong. he was always happy in new environments, left me with no worries, confident in his ability except in speach.

 

Eventually he began to talk with them but they had to gain his trust and not force the issue and it was only single word mumbled.

 

every year he had a new teacher at school. he had to really trust them before opening up to them and this often took until the summer term. He would hide behind his hands everytime anyone spoke to him, asked him a question or wanted him to do anything. with the children they saw he was very articulate, and always had friendsto play with.

 

He was lucky in that the school recognised his difficulty with new adults and by end year 1 he was able to be put in a mixed yr 1/2 class with the same teacher for 2 years.

he never looked back, and is now an extremely confident young man who will happily stand up in front of hundreds of stangers give a talk or presentation and not actually get nervous, and is in 3rd year at Uni.

 

It worked by not insisting or making him seem any different to his peers or forcing the issue. Discuss this with  parent at a time when the child is not with them . in this way you will be able to know the progress at home, and hopefully reassure you that the child is progressing.

 

note- In my sons case puppets etc did not work he just became scared of them!!!

 

Inge

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Hi

I had an elective mute in my class for 2 years. She was very chatty at home, but not a word to adults at school. However, after a year she began to speak to me, but it was only when she felt that she could trust me and that she felt safe with me.

 

Before she came to my class however, a lot of work had been done using the programme, 'Breaking Down the Barriers' which is fantastic. Very small steps, simple activities and great results....over time.

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Guest MaryEMac

Hi,

I have a little girl in my playgroup who will not speak to adults. Last summer she was in the group with her brother and she would speak to me but he went to school in September and she stopped talking to adults. She will chatter away with the other children but if a grown-up hoves into view no more is heard. One problem is that one of her friends will speak for her and if we want to do one to one the friend says 'I'll come with you'.

We do not get any pleases or thankyous. This child will go to school in reception so she will find it difficult as will the teachers.

Only now will she come with me quite happily to look at a favourite book from home and I have had a few words spoken to me. I am only doing this activity twice a week at the most because I don't want to put her under pressure. Hopefully by July I might have cracked it.

Mary

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Many years ago (20+) I had a girl at preschool who didn't speak for the whole time she was with us, not even to her peers. She had a deaf/mute younger brother. She would however talk to me if she saw me out of preschool-we lived in the same area and I used to see her at the local shop/park etc. The other children just accepted her as she was, she used body language and facial expression to communicate with them at preschool.

 

It was excasperating at times but I just kept reminding myself that it must of took her a lot of willpower and concentration to pursue her choice of not interacting verbally and that hopefully this strength of will would be an asset to her in the future.

 

Peggy

ps it does appear to be a "girl" thing.

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I have a girl in my classs that receives funding for elective mutism. I also have 4 boys who are now just beginning to communicate. The girl spent 2 years in nursery and didnt speak to anyone or anyone at home so she was refered to the local hosipatal. Due to them all starting school with me at the same time i began to use basic (very due to my lack of knowledge) makaton with the children. I always asked the questions as if i expected a responce but also allowed the child to respond with a sign. I thought this was necessary as it was unfair on the others if they did not say thankyou etc. the boys all started instantly using the makaton. however the girl did not and still refused to communicate in any form so i set up a reward chart for her, if she used the sign she got a sticker when full she got extra time outside (something that she loves). This has slowly begun to work and she will nod and shake her head in responce to questions and says thankyou if the other children are not looking. gradually the boys have started adding speech to the makaton. 2 will real off sentences now and one has proved to be exceptionally able. I feel really pleased with how the children have begun to communicate and 2 of the parents have come in especially to thank me. i got a lot of ideas of web sites and although the books are written in narrative Torey Haden writes a lot of books on her experience working with elective mutes. Please feel free to email me with any queries though. good luck she will im sure come out in her own time the worry for me is the underlying cause.

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  • 1 year later...

I had a little boy in my family group who went into reception in January with the same thing. He would speak to his mom and brother, but not dad (they were divorced) or his maternal grandmother. At school he would play along side others but not speak, he would look at you by lowering his head and glancing up. By the time he went into reception he would whisper thankyou at milk and fruit time. His mom used to say to him 'id like you to speak today'. He has gone into reception though and is back to square one. He is on an IEP too. :o

 

Kerry

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I'm assuming that "elective mutism" and "selective mutism" are the same thing? Forgive me if I'm wrong - there was a forum discussion about selective mutes only a couple of weeks ago, you might get some more handy info if you do a forum search under that heading?

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I was lucky enough to go on a course led by Maggie Johnson about this - you can buy her book - The Selective Mutism Resource Manual, Speechmark publications ISBN 0-86388-280-3. 0800 243755. order code 002-4759.

 

I have attached the notes I typed up for other staff so I hope they might be of use.

 

The actual course notes are at school but will check if there are any references to contacts / resources....

 

SMIRA (selctive mutism info and research association) - parent / professional support group based in leicester - free membership - helpline 011621274111 (4-7pm most days). Video and info pack available.

COURSE_EVALUATION___selec_mutism.doc

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  • 8 months later...

Frustrating as it is for you one really useful bit of advice I was given by a speech therapist, when i had a child like this in the class was not to tell the next teacher, or visiting teachers/staff that the child doesn't speak, it seems strange and hard to do but apparently so many of us use different tone, body language/ approach the child in a different way (sometimes subconciously) that it can just encourage the child to continue. If they are just spoken to and expected to respond like everyone else it can be enough to jolt them into speaking again. Obviiously if the teacher then comes to you after a couple of days and asks you about child x not talking you can discuss it further but it worked for our child who went to a new class and began speaking from day one. Something to do with child psychology... may not help at the moment but worth thinking about if things don't improve. (also goes against the sharing information to ease transistion..but if it works...!) Good luck! :o

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That's interesting Han. A few years ago I was doing my teacher training in a year one class and there was a little girl in the class who was an elective mute. It was briefly mentioned to me that she didn't speak but that dad had brought a tape in of her speaking (the class teacher said she didn't believe it was her!). I didn't make a fuss and went through all the usual routines and in the second week I was there she just started speaking (she asked for some milk). It was actually a little boy who said "she's talking!!". I just said "Oh yes and what a beautiful voice it is" and I carried on. She was soon chatting and joining in. Don't get me wrong I don't think I did anything special but I think the change in teacher and routines and the fact that I didn't treat her any differently from the other children just gave her the jump start to begin talking.

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I had a little boy in preschool some years ago who only ever spoke to one friend outside his home, though I had heard him chatting away to her as they were in the school playground waiting for elder siblings. He communicated by gesture. It took until year 1 before he whispered to the teacher. By junior school he was talking normally.

 

Al

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Guest LOSINGTHEWILLTOLIVE

I have been reading some books by Torey Hayden who writes about her own experiences with Elective Mutism. She is a special education teacher and an educational psychologist who is also a best selling author. When I read her books they help me to understand that these children are trapped inside their own selves. Yet they all need love, support and just having someone who has patience, skill and determination helps them to help themselves.

 

If you get the chance then pick one to read on your next holiday, they really are a great read and definately make you feel that human beings rarely fit into conventional categories and diagnoses!

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I was on an SEN course last night and the Health Visitor leading the session was talking about a case where a nursery had contacted her because she was completely mute whilst at the setting. She had been there for over a year, and was of the age where she should have been talking.

 

Apparently the girl moved to another setting, and turned into a completely different child, within a short space of time. So much so that they couldn't get her to stop talking!

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Great moment today when our non verbal twins recorded themselves singing onto a talking postcard (TTS) It was fantastic to show/play to the parents at the end of the session. I think the pressure was off whilst they were playing with them and it was a great way of hearing their voices. May be another resource worth trying!

Han

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  • 1 year later...

Hi

 

Yes I've come across it beofre when I worked as a Nursery Assisitant in a nursery unit many years ago. We got around the situation as this particular child had siblings that he used to chat to all the time at home. We invited his brother in to the setting, it took a few visits but the child started taliking to his brother and realised actually chatting in the setting wasn't that bad. After the brother r had been a few times he became more confident about talking and we went from there. Does the child have siblings or friends she regulary plays with that could help from outside school, or may be the paretns could come in and help for a while?

 

Ruth

 

 

I have a child in Reception who refuses to speak to adults but is fine with the other children. She has had a difficult background, so obviously this will contribute.

She does as she is told and talks all the time at home, but now that she has been in my class for over a term and still not answeriing the register, it is concerning. She won't come out during carpet session not even to do something on the interactive whiteboard yet she is very confident with the other childre. It is difficult to collect evidence for her profile, and the only thing I can think to do is ask her parents to come in and hear her wordboxes, and do some of the profile tasks with her. It is however very difficult. An educational psychologist has said she has Elective Mutism. I am worried about how she can develop at school, as she continues not to talk.

She was the same at nursery and they tried for a year without success to communicate with her.

I have spoken to her at lunch time on a one to one basis about her food, but it's one word, and in class she even refuses to do that! I have an I.E.P and she is starting to nod her head - sometimes. She doesn't say please and thankyou for snacks, etc. which the other children comment on! I am hoping that before she starts in Year 1 that she will be able to talk. If anyone has come across this before or has any suggestions for me to try I would like to hear from you.

Thanks.

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I had a shock this week with my elective mute. All my group take it in turns to call the register at the start of each session and I (rather flippantly perhaps) asked him if he'd like to do it and he nodded and I thought "this will be interesting", but away he went, bright, clear voice calling out each child's name which he read himself too you could have heard a pin drop at the end - there wasn't a dry eye amongst the staff and we really wanted to shout and make a fuss of him, but restrained ourself and gave him a sticker, which he was thrilled with. Non-stop chat all day since then!

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I could still cry! I told his mus of course, but again felt I had to downplay it in front of her. I got a photo, would have videoed if i'd known! I wrote all about it in his diary of course

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Elective mute is a rather negative phrase at my setting we referred to the child as a selective talker. Much more positive! Also this was suggested by my SENCO support.

 

The little girl we had used to go into the bathroom and sing as she didn't think she could be heard. The sweetest sound was after a trip to the farm her little voice sang Old MacDonald, there was not a dry eye to be seen.

 

There was also a little boy who according to his previous setting had no language, our setting used Makaton and he would communicate with that. We were advised to give a running commentary as we played alongside him. Three weeks into the term, I heard a voice. The child concerned was sitting on my chair calling the register. Again staff were in tears. He never looked back, his parents were amazed. A speech therapist commented perhaps he hadn't had anything important to say before!

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I had an elective/selective mute in my reception class, she hadn't spoken to anyone while at nursery either but happily spoke at home - just stopped as she walked through the school gates. (One child had heard her speak normally in a shop and was amazed!) We nurtured her, lip read as she 'read'her reading book, but got lots of input from Mum and Dad as to how she was progressing when she read at home. Difficult to assess for a lot of profile. She always told her Mum she would talk in Y3. She used thumbs up/down in Y1 and started to talk right at the end of Y2 and, in Y3 presently, you would never have guessed she had been a selective mute!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Whilst doing my PGCE I had a child in my reception placement who never spoke to anyone apart from his gran. He had watched a drugs raid on his house, his dad beaten up, his mum abused, his dad jailed and was then taken into care - all before the age of 4. So he just stopped talking. The teachers had referred him to an ed psyc, ignored him or tried forcing him to speak, had his gran come in (he refused to talk to her all day) and used puppets (he began crying). When I started the main teaching in his class I tried not to show him it worried me, instead I wanted him to feel that if we have the freedom of speech, shouldn't we have the freedom of silence? Unlike all the other staff when giving out things in class I wouldn't push any of the kids to say 'thank you' so he wasn't pressured, during circle times instead of not asking him questions or worse still leaving him out, I would ask 'would you like to say something?' to EVERY child and if anyone (especially him) said no/shook their head/looked away then I would ask the next child. I also spent a lot of 1 to 1 time with him. We would curl up in the book corner and I would read stories to him during playtimes and if his was playing with the action men then I would sit next to him and silently play with the afrmy men. Two weeks before the end of my placement he was sitting on my lap in the book corner and I whilst I was reqading the story I chatted away about the characters etc. and at one point I said 'oh no, where has the cat gone' - he pointed a tree on the page and whispered 'there'. Instead of shouting it from the roof tops or congratulating him I said 'yep' and carried on reading. I later quietly told the staff and his foster mum and over the next fortnight he said a little more to me each day, first on a 1 to 1 basis, then in a small group. When I left I got a big bunch of flowers from his gran and a hug from him. 3 years later whilst he will never be Little Mr Chatty, he does talk to everyone at home and school.

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Whilst doing my PGCE I had a child in my reception placement who never spoke to anyone apart from his gran. He had watched a drugs raid on his house, his dad beaten up, his mum abused, his dad jailed and was then taken into care - all before the age of 4. So he just stopped talking. The teachers had referred him to an ed psyc, ignored him or tried forcing him to speak, had his gran come in (he refused to talk to her all day) and used puppets (he began crying). When I started the main teaching in his class I tried not to show him it worried me, instead I wanted him to feel that if we have the freedom of speech, shouldn't we have the freedom of silence? Unlike all the other staff when giving out things in class I wouldn't push any of the kids to say 'thank you' so he wasn't pressured, during circle times instead of not asking him questions or worse still leaving him out, I would ask 'would you like to say something?' to EVERY child and if anyone (especially him) said no/shook their head/looked away then I would ask the next child. I also spent a lot of 1 to 1 time with him. We would curl up in the book corner and I would read stories to him during playtimes and if his was playing with the action men then I would sit next to him and silently play with the afrmy men. Two weeks before the end of my placement he was sitting on my lap in the book corner and I whilst I was reqading the story I chatted away about the characters etc. and at one point I said 'oh no, where has the cat gone' - he pointed a tree on the page and whispered 'there'. Instead of shouting it from the roof tops or congratulating him I said 'yep' and carried on reading. I later quietly told the staff and his foster mum and over the next fortnight he said a little more to me each day, first on a 1 to 1 basis, then in a small group. When I left I got a big bunch of flowers from his gran and a hug from him. 3 years later whilst he will never be Little Mr Chatty, he does talk to everyone at home and school.

 

A lovely story - it brought a little tear to my eye!

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