Melba Posted May 24, 2012 Share Posted May 24, 2012 I have a member of staff who constantly talks about herself in the third person to the children. The effect of this is that most children know her name, although they use it for all of us so they are confused. I would like to have something to give her about the importance of speaking in a normally correct way, especially to children with speech problems as I feel that is really important but don't want to seem unnecessarily picky as there have been lots of issues with this staff member. I have info from speech therapists but none mention this issue. Can anyone help? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted May 24, 2012 Share Posted May 24, 2012 You could try asking her over a cup of coffee maybe why she does it. It seem's like a toddler would speak though, you know before they'e mastered and understand I, ME. We all speak like that to our own children though dont we? 'Give mommy a kiss' kind of thing. Does she speak like it to anyone else or just the children? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melba Posted May 25, 2012 Author Share Posted May 25, 2012 I agree that many do talk that way with younger toddlers, it just feels wrong to do it to 4/5 year olds. And no, she talks normally to adults. If it wasn't confusing the children I probably wouldn't say anything but they think her name is a general term for adults in the same way as "mummy" and use it for everyone. Also one of the younger children has picked up her habit and started to talked about herself in the third person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 I'd just ask her why she does it and go from there. :1b Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flowlow Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 There was a learning language and loving it course that was run by speech therapists in cornwall is there anything like that were you are. This course covered everything from how to talk, listen and interact with the children. They also came in and filmed you so you could reflect on your own practice so you picked up all the things to improve on yourself (they obviously would point you in the right direction if you missed things) maybe this would help, more training but such a brilliant course and she may notice and change what she does for herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catma Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 That drives me to distraction!! I can't stand it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catma Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 In fact, whenever I'm observing someone and they do that it's like nails down a chalk board!! And when it's coupled with a sing song, "babies" voice it's even worse!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 Bet you hate 'words' like bikkie's, gee gee, doggy and brum brum too 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catma Posted May 25, 2012 Share Posted May 25, 2012 Yup!! If children can manage Tyrannosaurus they can cope with horse!! cx 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 26, 2012 Share Posted May 26, 2012 I sympathise and will be watching this thread with interest! 'My' nursery nurse is exactly the same and when it was pointed out clearly decided to ignore me. :angry: She still talks in the third person to the children and not a day goes by without one, more or many of the following: 'Mrs S said ...' 'That's Mrs S' toys' (in response to a child who was not taking care of the toys!) 'Mrs S would like you to ...' 'Now you have made Mrs S feel ...' 'What did Mrs S say?' Etc etc etc I have come to the conclusion that Mrs S has an identity problem, and feel sorry for her. Now I have got it off my chest (after more than five years) and look forward to any advice! :huh: :1b Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melba Posted May 26, 2012 Author Share Posted May 26, 2012 I like the idea of filming how staff speak to the children. I think it comes across as a bit patronising and uncomfortable and that would probably be obvious if they could hear themselves, more than just being told. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catma Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 I have come to the conclusion that Mrs S has an identity problem, and feel sorry for her. 22 - 36 Uses gestures, sometimes with limited talk, e.g. reaches toward toy, saying ‘I have it’. 30 - 50 Uses talk in pretending that objects stand for something else in play, e,g, ‘This box is my castle.’ Or maybe she is just still working at an early stage of development?? I'd use the new prime area development matters unique child descriptions and ask how we will support children to develop the language needed if they get a deficit model. I think it drives me mad because it just sounds so patronising. :blink: Cx 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 I think it drives me mad because it just sounds so patronising. :blink: Cx Its just plain wrong. I feel a small jolt of the ridiculous when I hear baby talk, its so unnecessary and makes learning to talk double the trouble. If you learn 'gee gee' now you've got to learn horse/pony at some later date. What a waste of time. Melba, could you merely say to her that from now on you wont be able to allow that type of talk, especially as one of the children is starting to speak in the same way. It's not acceptable is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melba Posted May 27, 2012 Author Share Posted May 27, 2012 I think I just wanted to know that I wasn't being overly picky, just me being fussy AGAIN. It helps to know other people agree with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flowlow Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 The filming works well, most of my staff did the course in the end and all found it helpful once the initial worry at being filmed wore off a bit. When I was watching myself back I was able to see where I could have improved and also see the bits I thought I hadn't done very well but was actually fine. I think when you see it for yourself you see it more clearly/truthfully if that makes sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lashes2508 Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 Can i just add that although i don't agree with continual third person reference , there may be isolated times that depending on the child you have to use thrid person when explaining or setting example. Some children do not always understand me or I , very isolated and dependent on the child . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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