Lucy P Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 The nursery manager has just informed me that one of the parents approached her tonight and explained that she is sufferring from depression. Apparently, she has been suffering from this since her child was born (will be 2 in June). She says she is receiving support for this (not sure from who), but sometimes worries herself as she has strange thoughts. E.g. when she is bathing the child she sometimes just wants to leave them there unsupervised. The manager said she would pass this on to me (nursery owner) and the parent is quite happy about this, but i am not in work tommorrow as i am on a CAF completer course, so can't see her until Monday. I just really wanted to know if anyone has experienced this or any advice as to where i go from here, should i report it to anyone, who can i put her in touch with for support etc. Many Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 This is beyond my experience I'm afraid but I've attached a link for a site where there's a factsheet on postnatal depression. Hope this helps a bit. http://www.careforthefamily.org.uk/supportnet/?also=true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hali Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 if the parent is happy for you to know this info - the next time you see her have a chat and just let her know that you are there for her so that she feels she can come to you for advice if she needs it - also can you signpost her to anywhere else in your area that may be able to support her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 Hi I worked in a setting where a mum had post natal depression and she too used to 'frighten' herself sometimes by the thoughts she was having. We used to offer mum a warm welcome and talk when she wanted to talk, offer her a quiet staff room and cup of tea some mornings so she didn't have to go back to an empty house and sit on her own and on the mornings she was upset and didn't want to talk we respected her wishes and kept it 'business as usual'. As regard her child we made lots of fuss of him and always made sure one of us was available for extra cuddles when he needed them. We offered her as many extra sessions as we could so the child had the routine of nursery as much as possible. Most of all we tried to give her whatever support we could whenever she needed it. Mental health is a tricky thing to deal with as unlike most illness you can't see it. Lots of people find it hard to say the right thing, but ignoring it and not ever talking about it to the person makes it harder for them. Hope all goes well Sue x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running Bunny Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 If she is receiving support as she says she is, do you think that she would be open to arranging a meeting between nursery, her and the person who is supporting her (health visitor?) This would help you and key members of staff (child's key worker for example) get some more information about the condition in general and know how to offer ongoing support to the mum and the child, if and when needed. Just a thought... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
narnia Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 ...and another thought: by telling staff how she feels, is she really telling you she is afraid that shemight harm her child in some way??is she asking for help??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smiles Posted March 27, 2008 Share Posted March 27, 2008 The Mum being able to tell someone is a good sign. It is sometimes very hard to admit to yourself let alone someone else that you suffer with postnatal depression for fear of people judging you. Sues advice is execellent, as a person who has suffered with post natal depression myself I struggled without support . She will have good days and bad days and may just need to share her feelings with someone.I have looked at the link and it provides useful information. smiles Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucy P Posted March 27, 2008 Author Share Posted March 27, 2008 Thanks so much everyone Your advice is excellent as always, i will try to arrange a meeting with mum asap on monday. She did stress to the manager that she did not want any other staff to know about this, the manager explained that she had to inform me, which she was happy with, but definately no other staff. I am really glad that she has been able to approach us with this issue, i just hope that i can help her in some way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 Hi Lucy I just wanted to ask whether you will be documenting these conversations in respect of your safeguarding responsibilities? I was struck by what narnia said about this being a request for help, however oblique. A good place to start - if she's worried she might harm her children is to ring the NSPCC. They are genuinely very supportive and helpful, and will know where to get the right sort of support for her. Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wolfie Posted March 28, 2008 Share Posted March 28, 2008 I completely agree with Maz. The only child protection referral that I have ever done turned out to be down to a case of Mum needing help and support for post-natal depression that we didn't realise she had. Social Services were brilliant and very supportive of both me and Mum - the situation was resolved quickly and effectively, to the satisfaction of everyone involved - but the whole situation could have been avoided if we'd been able to offer support to her at an earlier stage. The fact that she has confided in someone is a good thing, it must have been very hard for her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucy P Posted March 28, 2008 Author Share Posted March 28, 2008 Found out a little bit more from the manager today. Apparently she was suffering from depression before conceiving but was advised by GP to stop taking the medication when she was trying to become pregnant. Since then the depression has become steadily worse. When she went for the first scan she confided that she felt physically sick on seeing the image of the baby on the screen and since that moment has never felt a bond with her child. I can only assume that GP and HV are aware of the situation but will find out more on monday. Thanks Maz for reminding me about documenting our conversations, this is always an after thought for me, but will be very useful if i have to take the step in involving any other agencies. Even after attending the CAF completer course today and asking advice from the numerous health professionals in attendance, the question of who and who not to inform appears to remain considerably woolly! Will let you know how it goes on monday. Thanks very much for all the advice so far. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted March 30, 2008 Share Posted March 30, 2008 Even after attending the CAF completer course today and asking advice from the numerous health professionals in attendance, the question of who and who not to inform appears to remain considerably woolly! Why am I not surprised Nothing is ever straightforward, is it? Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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