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Hi,

 

I just wondered if anybody could help me!

 

I have a boy in my setting who is five years and is not toilet trained. I have tried really hard to get him to go to the toilet. Anyway we have decided as a school we are not prepared to keep cleaning him (this happens nearly everyday). So mum and dad are called to clean him up and they are not happy. As a school are we allowed to refuse to clean the child? and do you have any suggestions, we have tried rewards, reminders, his seen the school nurse and nothing is working.

 

Thank You for any words of wisdom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Goldenwink :o

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This is a tough one, isn't it!

 

I'm in a DN, so we don't really have any option, although usually they are toilet trained by the time they are in Pre-school, although we do have a girl of 4.5 at present who becomes hysterical at the sight of a potty or toilet!!!!! :oxD

 

I really wouldn't think you have the luxury of time to spare to continually be cleaning a child up in this way, although I don't know your legal position - inclusiveness etc-, and expect you can hardly afford to employ someone purely in this capacity :( . How do the parents cope at home, does this happen at home?

 

I think along with your concerns about the cleaning up should be concerns as to what is actually going on 'behind the scenes' - just a thought.

 

Sue :D

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Goldenwink,

 

No help to you, I'm afraid! But we clearly have a "common" subject: I've just started a new topic on POTTIES!!!

 

Good luck with getting help

 

Diane.

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Hi! we had a child with exactly this problem last year! It took a long time for him to overcome his problem but he did! so hang in there!

 

The SENCO and I had a meeting with his parents where we explained that for Health and Safety reasons we couldn't change a number two mess and explained that this was school policy and the parents seemed fine with this.

 

What we did was create a star chart for him which his parents carried on with at home (same chart sent home each day) It was split into days and each time that he sat on the toilet we gave him a silver star, if he then performed(!!!) he got a gold star - He really responded to this and was very proud to share it with his parents and vice verca when he returned to school and shared it with us! We tied it into our school reward system of merits - setting him a target of five stars for a merit and increasing it each time to extend his achievements, his parents made the links at home - rewarding him when he was rewarded at school.

 

We made the time for him to go to the toilet when it was quiet and empty by passing him a toilet symbol (makaton) which he took to the TA and she went with him (lots of silver stars!), taking a book or toy to make the experience less stressful for him as he had an irrational fear of the toilet from a young age. His parents didn't know what to do so seemed to leave it! they were very appreciative when we approached them and offered our support, i think that the key here is communication with parents and a joint approach! good luck and hang in there! Sorry if this is warbly, typing and thinking at the same time!

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Hi golden wink,

not really got any answers for you as I dont know the position legally re inclusion but we employed the same tactics as you when we had a child doing this in school. The little boy in question had lots of other behavioural issues too and lots going on at home so we suspected it was attention seeking behaviour but we certainly couldnt cope with it in school. Dont know how it eventually resolved as I left before it did. (But not because of it!!)

 

However you do need 2 of you to do this and you should have protective clothing.

 

Most children of 5 have been successfully trained unless there are other issues, so involve your SenCo?

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Hi,

I had a little girl with a similiar problem and it turned out that she had a problem with her bowels.

She was given medication to regulate her 'movements' -basically she was constipated with leakage (trying to keep this polite)

This presented as soiling and it was only through involving h/v and G/P that the problem was resolved . Mum was really co-operative.

 

Barb

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Hi Goldenwink

 

A couple of years ago there was a little girl in the parallel Reception class who just wouldn't go to the toilet and everything was 'done' in her clothes wherever she was. She always had a least one change of clothes at school and was just cleaned and changed whenever she needed to be. No fuss was made about it, and she is fine now (well she must be Year 2)

 

Does this help? There was a full-time teaching assistant in the class with the teacher and we always made sure there were two members of staff present at any changing incident (which I believe is in accordance with the guidelines - to protect staff) It was a bit of a pain, now I am remembering all about it, but we all got very quick at the procedure (including the little girl) but every child has their own individual need or needs in their own little ways don't they?

 

Also, a little confession, I remember I was quite bad at going to the toilet when I was in infant school - believe it or not I was just terrified of asking (v. shy) so I might have a little extra sympathy in me for this sort of problem!

 

PS Just to reassure everyone - I am a confident toilet user now!

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