SueFinanceManager Posted February 22, 2005 Share Posted February 22, 2005 Hi all My son told me the following 2 very silly jokes today and they made me smile so I thought I'd share them and maybe if any of you have any suitably silly offerings then post them here, you can never have enough laughs and smiles in my humble opinion What goes oooooooooooooooooooo? A cow with no lips How do you get two whales in a car? Along the M4 and across the Severn bridge Hope they make you smile too Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 22, 2005 Share Posted February 22, 2005 Love the cow one Not a joke but when I picked my grandson up for preschool yesterday he leaned his neck toward me and said, " Nanny, can you smell my dads perfume, when I get to preschool the girls will want to kiss me, but I don't want their germs" He's only 3. (Must admit though, I don't think much of dad's taste in aftershave) Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted February 24, 2005 Share Posted February 24, 2005 This from a 7 yr old today Whats the difference between a snake and a piecost? Whats a piecost? About £1.50 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted February 24, 2005 Author Share Posted February 24, 2005 Rea I like it Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 Reminds me of an old favourite: Where do you to go weigh a pie? Somewhere over the rainbow.... Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 My eldest told me this when he was about 3, he loved the skeleton stories. "Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?" "because he had no body to go with" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hali Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 ok if we are going down this route, the only joke i can ever remember because im usless is......................................... What do you call a one eyed dinosaur????????? do-you-think-he-saw-us sorry girls...and boys Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest doohanok5 Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 What game do cows play at parties???? Moooooosical chairs What do cats eat for breakfast???? Mice Krispies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Verona Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 Another really old one......................... What do you call a reindeer with no eyes? No idea (no eyed deer - get it???) Sue J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gezabel Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 Sorry but I still smile at the elephant jokes especially what does an elephant do when it's stuck in a tree? Sits on a leaf and waits for autumn Years ago I must have driven my mum mad by saying would you like £14 (and of course every time she said yes!) and I promptly gave her a pebble or bit of gravel and said 14 pounds in one stone!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 26, 2005 Share Posted February 26, 2005 How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut... How many ears did Davey Crocket (sp?) have? Answer:3 - a left ear, a right ear and a wild frontier! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2005 Share Posted February 27, 2005 One little girl always tells the same joke, usually when we're sitting down for snack:- Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because it wasn't peeling very well. Boom! Boom! Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted February 28, 2005 Author Share Posted February 28, 2005 Guys These are brilliant, just the remedy for the monday morning blues, keep em coming. Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susan Posted February 28, 2005 Share Posted February 28, 2005 The first joke my now 17 year old ever told was "why are ladies stronger than men?" "because they have ladders in their tights!" it was his party piece at the age of about 3! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Here's one very popular joke with four year olds.... Why did Tigger put his paw down the toilet? Because he was looking for Pooh... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 I'm eating my breakfast Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Thats what I call a real groaner!!!!!!! But they will love it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Sorry Rea, will try to redeem myself:- What's brown and sticky? A stick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Love it maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beau Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 I hope this works - it's dedicated to Rea and Sue R. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rea Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Thank you, thank you. I'd forgotten Sue was technically challenged too, I feel almost normal now. Joke :- Barber - would you like a hair cut sir? Mna - No, I'd like all of them cut. Joke:- What was the tortoise doing on the motor way? 1 mile an hour. Joke:- What has 6 legs and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Sniff! Well, at least we've a sense of humour!! But Carol, I can nearly do things, now I've got Windows xp and a computer that can do the washing, ironing and wake me up in the morning....... :wacko: Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Sue R I'm fortunate enough to have a man to do all that for me... Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Well, I did have, until he bought all the machines and gizmos......... Was my favourite person, until he messed up my internet!! (love him really, since he sorted it again ) Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 That's what I like to hear, Sue, such unconditional love! Tip for a happy relationship: tamper with a woman's internet at your peril!! Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Good one!! Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beau Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Especially when she's got important FSF business to attend to! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue R Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Quoi??? Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 2, 2005 Share Posted March 2, 2005 Ooh, yuk !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueFinanceManager Posted March 14, 2005 Author Share Posted March 14, 2005 Hi guys Try this one, made me laugh Two tourist driving in Wales stop at a place called Llanhyfryddawellenhynfolybarudgogollan for lunch. One guy asks the waitress "before we order could you please pronounce where we are very slowly" The girl leans over and says "Burr-gurr-king" Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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