Puzzling Child :s

[Guest]

I look after a little boy who's just turned two. He is obsessed with tractors and the colour blue. He won't play with the toy tractor, he just wants to hold it. This is preventing him from playing with anything else. If the tractors aren't there, he will just find a car to hold. I am having real trouble getting him to show an interest in anything else. I'm also drawing a blank on how to extend his learning, incorporating tractors into other games etc. Even jigsaw puzzles he will find the piece with the tractor on and hold on to it. If we have Megablocks out he with pick out all the blue ones and just hold onto them. He enjoys watching me play but won't join in! He seems uncertain when there aren't blue crayons or paint and quite often just won't do an activity if it isn't blue or to do with tractors! Do I incorporate tractors more into the day, or hide all the tractors to try and get him playing with other things??

 

Any idea?

[Sue R]

Oh, dear, Jo!

 

That's a bit of a tickler - sounds a bit like a three year old we've got who won't let go of one of the small world cows! He will involve himself, but as you say it makes it hard to play properly while he's still holding it!

 

I can't really think what to suggest straight off, but wanted to express solidarity

 

Sure someone will be along with ideas, soon!

 

Sue

[Guest]

Last year I had a child just like this. He would hold on to a car for the whole of the session. He wouldnt want to put it down even for a snack. Eventually though, by encouraging him to put the car on the table or next to him on the mat (ensuring him that noone else would take it), he began to play with other things. After a month or two, he didnt obsess so much about the cars and began to join in with most of the activities/resources available. Seemed to take an age and it was very frustrating at the time.

 

Good luck

[Guest]

it could just be that he needs it for comfort if he is holding onto it then he finds comfort in it. We had a boy that had to hold onto a dinosaur every session. we carried on getting them out for him until he was ready to move off and try something else and now he uses the whole room. I would say that he is very young and not to worry too much about extending it at the moment wait until he seems a bit more ready

 

Deb

[Guest]

HI hon, he is young but I would certainly get youri Foundation Stage advisor in to take a look and make some observations.. if he has SEN (which I'm not suggesting he has) it is such a long process and will require some good long term observations... obviously you need parental consent for formal checks to be made so you could possible ask the advisor to informally when they are in the setting and advise if further assessment is needed xx

[Andreamay]

Have you any other concerns about him Chicken Licken?

[Guest]

I think you need to make some fairly detailed observations on this year - say 3 a day for a week of 5 min observations - writing down everything he says/does in that time. Then analyse and see whether this happens all the time or not. It sounds to me like a possiblility of ASD and you need to have lots of evidence in case. In terms of helping him would a visual timetable help e.g have a picture of a tractor and the colour blue, and other pictures say of other small world and other colours. Have the timetable on card with a velcro strip. Have something else first, then the tractor - so the child knows he plays with the other object first then gets the tractor, and same with blue objects.

[Guest]

What about giving him a special little bag or basket to pop the tractor in? He could carry it around with him and keep it by him or, in the case of a bag wear it over his shoulder. Hey what if its a blue bag. You could run up a simple little bag with fleecy fabric, there are lots of different colours, patterns, sheep even - continuing the tractor theme. My children love little bags and if you can't find something then its usually hidden away in one! There are 'Cars' lunchboxes too aren't there (the new disney film...) maybe he'd like one of those? just a thought.

[Guest]

Thank you so much for your input - you are all fantastic! I think it is a security thing,his disposition is, shall we say 'delicate'. I've tried the bag thing and he wasn't interested. I will carry out observations on him and I will ask my network co-ordinator for her opinion (I'm a childminder). He's a very clever little boy but I do worry he's not getting an 'all-round' experience when he's with me.

 

Thanks again hunnies xxxx

 

PS His parents are both highly qualified psychologists and they know what he's like, so part of me thinks if they are worried then they'd do something, but I can't rely on that as they are too close - sometimes it takes an 'outsider' doesn't it.

[Guest]

Sorry can't offer any more than what others say, but it did make me smile when you said parents were psychologists.

I remember one delightful little boy that was with me, started school very young and made efforts to chase and join in with the other children. He struggled maturity wise and fell over frequently. Mum the psychologist came in with both barrels blazing alleging that he was being bullied. It was pointed out that we had only observed him falling over, but she was adamant that she was a psychologist and recognised bullying when she saw it. I had to stop him running around in the end!!!!

So I do agree with you an outsider can certainly spot things parents can't

[SmileyPR]

I had a child some years ago who had all the signs of a SEN child. His mum said she was an educational pshycologist, but she never admitted the child had to be tested. The father said they didn't want their child to be labelled. I said that it is not a matter of labelling, but of providing what is best for the child (you don't put glasses on a deaf child or a hearing aid on a blind child). The child kept on struggling.

 

Later on I had another child in the same situation. This time his mum was a 'doctor' (Ph.D, not really a GP or something like that). They didn't accept the child had problems. Everyone in school noticed! Finally, she decided to change the child of school without testing him.

 

I know it is not easy for parent's to accept their child has some difficulties, but it is worse to keep denying it than to deal with it the soonest possible. It makes such a big difference!