Made My Sad Decision!

[Guest]

Haven't got that long to jot my week of decisions (bet you're all glad about that!!), but I have decided to call it a day at pre-school and will be handing everything over in July/August.

It hasn't been done lightly and have had a terrible couple of days at work, telling the staff. They are shocked, but fully understand why I have to do it - for my sanity and for the sake of my family.

I love the children (and staff) and still finding it hard to come to terms with the fact I won't be there to see their younger siblings in September, but I thought it was best to leave July, so the new supervisor can start afresh with the new intake.

Just don't know what to do now, I definately don't want to do anything with Early Years as I have totally become demoralised and disillusioned with the whole thing - which I am really upset about. My family always laughed saying that I would still be there at 70! and even then thrown or forced out!

I do feel as though a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders - just hope to goodness I won't regret it!!!

[Guest]

I have obviously missed your previous posts and a quick forum search has not really enlightened me, but it seems so sad that you have to give up a vocation that you are obviously passionately committed to. But if you truely believe that your family life is at risk - then I wish you all the best in whatever to go on to. I think it is unbeilvabley sad that when committed people leave child care, but from your last post I summise it is events outside your control.

[Guest]

Hi Raine - don't want to bore the others it's on this section about page 4 'Will I regret it, feeling low' even more low now!!!!

[Guest]

Hi Kymberley, Just caught up on your previous posts. I have had a grotty day today feeling ground down with bureaucracy and swamped with paper work (also secretly and shamfully pleased that other people feel in adequate when they read some posts on this site ) But I am truely sorry that you have been driven to your decision, but hopeful that it means that you have new opportunities and will be happy and fulfilled in which ever direction you choose to go. Lots and lots of good wishes for your future and hoping you enjoy the next few weeks with your children and staff.

Love Raine

[Rea]

Hi Kymberley, at least the decision has been made. I kept my resignation letter in my bag for 3 days before finally plucking up the courage to hand it over. I felt the same as you, have I done the right thing, will I regret it? You've thought about it for a long time, you've posted on here and been given feedback on th pro's and cons. If it wasnt the right decision you wouldnt have made it. Dont jump to any plans about what to do. Carry on as normal until your replacement is decided and then slowly ease off allowing them to take the lead. It will be your chance to finally get back to playing, someone else will be shuffling paper. When July comes, relax, chill out and let things fall naturally into place. I was going to go into tutoring but signed with an agency because I couldnt be without the children, any chillden, They are so much fun. It's been an excellent choice for me and I've no doubt you will make a superb choice too, just dont rush it. ;oads of luck

[Guest]

Thanks Raine!

I do feel dreadful tonight. Two members of staff in particular are really upset and keep crying all the time. I feel really guilty for them, but I really need to do this for peace of mind.

I don't want anyone to get the wrong end of the stick with regards to my family, they have been so supportive over the years, but they are worried about me. If the job was the same as about 5 years ago, I wouldn't even consider leaving, but the amount of paperwork is overwhelming and I just don't think the children benefit at all!

I/We will have a great time until the end of term -I do love this time of year because things start to wind down and the fun returns, but I know come Oct/Nov it will all start up again and I really get anxious about record books etc. My husband just tells me that I must think of myself for once and not to continually worry about children, staff and parents - and of course OFSTED!!

I hope I do find something rewarding - I would like to think that I can do something along the 'caring' lines, because that is all I know, but looking at job centre's list, doesn't look good!

WHAT HAVE I DONE!!!

[Susan]

Kymberley, sorry you have had to make this decision. Dont fret about what you will do, I am sure that will happen soon enough. Concentrate on reclaiming your life and your family and I am sure you will have no regrets.

You may yet decide child care etc is for you and someone will snap you up!

Good luck.

[Guest]

Hi Kymberley

 

You have called this thread 'made my sad decision' but I think you have made a very BRAVE decision.

 

I've read your previous posts and can identify WITH EVERY WORD YOU'VE SAID. I expect there's a few of us tonight who are going to be thinking 'wish it was me!'

 

Good luck for your future!

 

Janice x

[Guest]

Hi Kymberley, I hope all goes well for you in the future whatever path you decide to take job wise. I left my post of Pre-school supervisor last term after months of consideration. In the end the pressure of paperwork (mostly done in my own time), an uninterested/unmotivated committee and an unfriendly / unhelpful feeder school head took their toll and I needed a break. (After doing the job for 6 years). I too felt guilty for leaving the other staff members as we all got on so well but your own life and well being must come first. Leaving left a vast gap in my life but I am slowly getting used to it and am applying for other childcare jobs now. (Although I would never work for a voluntary committee again - 1 pay rise in 6 years and that resulted in the chairman resigning!) I found this forum an enormous help over the years and still read many of the posts. Good luck again.

[nicki-k]

Good luck from me too Kimberley. I wish you all the best in whatever you decide to do. A new challenge is a positive thing.

[Guest]

Yes, it is sad when we feel we have no choice but to make these difficult decisions, I expect you even feel a bit angry at how the early years work has changed since you first came into it, and how helpless we all feel to stop the ever circling roundabout of change that is making us all giddy. You may even be grieving and feel bereaved, because you have lost a dream, the dream of nurturing, caring for and educating young children for the rest of your professional life, but it has become a burocratic nightmare.

 

Let yourself go through these stages of grieving, anger, remorse, what if, could I have done something different, better, if only..........etc

 

to then come through to a brighter future, a new life that is right for you and your family. They will be so happy for you, happy to have you back again, and you will have time for you, to be Kymberly again.

 

And I echo what janice says, you have made a considered and brave decision, which in the end will be right for the staff ( your friends) and children too.

 

I empathise with your loss, but I also wish you hope and happiness for the future, in whatever you decide to do.

 

Peggy

[hali]

good luck and best wishes.

[Guest]

Haven't read your other posts yet but I know how you feel. I feel that I am at a cross roads the same as you don't know whether to carry on or finish. I am sure if you feel that a weight has been taken off your shoulders that you have made the right decision for you and your family. My mother is always telling me that I need to make time for them and not take on every one elses problems but thats the type of people we are to be in the caring profession. I'm sure you will find a job that gives you satisfaction and will soon be " caring " for others but without the hassles and dreaded paperwork. good luck for the future

[Guest]

Gosh, it must really be a full moon - not so sure which one - but I can empathise with you as everyone else has. It seems to me that with all the things coming on board that things won't get any easier either. It's a tough decision to make and it maybe after a break you may want to take up another role where you can really use your skills. Sorry I haven't had time to read your other posts - too busy with blo..y studying and paperwork to keep in touch with everything so I am not sure where you are coming from but I can make an informed guess.

It seems to me that its the time of year for a reassessment of our lives - when you have made that decision you as you say feel a relief - so good luck, keep in touch and remember that nothing is forever - you can go back, you can go forward - the choice is yours to do with as you wish - make the most of it.

Nikki

[Alison]

Well done Kymberly I understand how hard it is to make the break and I think preschools are the hardest place to leave.

 

the weight that has lifted from your shoulders since you made your decision should tell you that you have made the right choice.

 

dont worry that you will regret this decision, just because you are leaving preschool doesnt mean you can never work with children again . if you really miss it, get agency work you can dip in and out without the ties and the hassle of paperwork.

 

Hope you enjoy your new found freedom and feel motivated to look for a new challenge in life and if that means working in tescos then enjoy it!!!

 

All the best in what ever you decide to do

[Guest]

Hi Everyone.

Thank you for your replies still can't believe I've done it! One part of me knows I have done the right thing, but the other part is very unsure - I'll have no Nativity Plays ( I just adore Christmas time with children!), No Easter Bonnets, hugs, feeling valued by parents, funny things they say and do (staff as well as children!), being creative and just the general life I have become used to.

Peggy, you are right when you say there is a certain amount of anger - I do feel cheated and angry. I (and my staff) have worked really hard to make the group as it is today and it is just the bureaucracy and paper work that has finally taken it's toll.

I'm certainly not saying that everything is wrong with Early Years, because some aspects are good, but they definately use fear factor when expressing how things should be done and i'm afraid I'm not that strong anymore. The stuffing has been kicked out of me and I'm no longer able to fight our corner!

It is time for new blood and from someone that 'still believes'. I suppose I was lucky enough to have worked 13 very happy years, it's only been the last two that have been somewhat demoralising!

Any way just to thank you all again. Hopefully I'll get back soon with some good news about a job!

[Puddleducks]

If you are concerned about missing the child contact - how about staying involved with childrn in a voluntary role... Beavers and rainbows always need helpers?

[Marion]

every best wish for the future

[Guest]

As an employer who has had goos staff resign because of work/life balance, not wanting to go any higher than assistant but feel "pressured" to continually develop professionally etc etc, I value these people for making their decisions, and know it's not easy, but is the best for everyone.

 

However, when i say to them keep in touch, visit, always welcome to come to Christmas, Easter events, summer play days, any day to play.......I REALLY MEAN IT. And I know life goes on, but would always welcome them, without any prssure, and the children I am sure would like it too.

 

So, if feelings are not to raw, or it isn't too difficult, between jobs or on a day off, go into your old preschool and have some fun with the children, catch up news with your old workmates, i'm sure they would love to see you.

 

Peggy

 

p.s. an extra pair of hands is always welcome come nativity time, even if it is to hold up the star behind the cradle

[Guest]

We've talked about Nativityand I'm going to go in AND do the performance for the church too. We did it for the first time last year and they loved it, so I will definately keep that day free!! Yahoo!!!!!!!