Adoption

[Stargrower]

Is anyone able to recommend books about adoption?

 

I had a long chat with an adoptive parent this morning about her journey/her adopted child's journey, how he might react to changes in a different way, attachment and security, his behaviour and development. The child has been with us for about a year - he has just turned three, we have always known he is adopted. It is a shame she left it so long before we had this conversation,although I can understand why she did. She wasn't complaining at all but she raised some points that got me thinking that we could be managing her child differently. They are about to adopt their third child (they are birth parents to their oldest) who will also come to us.

 

I am looking for a book/books that would be relevant to level 3 and above staff, so not books aimed at social workers or academic research.

 

Also, any books about adoption relating to under fives.

 

Any advice welcome too. The child has a language delay, although not hugely concerning and he is making progress. He shows some challenging behaviour, but again, not unmanageable. I am thinking about what we need to be aware of at transition times - he has just moved into our pre-school room, his relationships with adults and children and his view of the world.

 

Thanks in advance

Edited April 16, 2015 by Stargrower

[blondie]

i have just googled this and came up with

 

a first look at adoption =my parents picked me - pat thomas

our twitchy - kes gray

i wished for you - marianne richmond

the most precious present in the world - becky edwards

a mummy for owen - maria butler

we belong together - a book about adoption and families - todd parr

[Guest]

Your Local Authority might be able to help you with suggestions, they should have a Looked After Children's Team and although he wouldn't be classed as a Looked After Child, they might be able to signpost you to some useful publications. The following are quite useful blogs:

 

Jane Evans

http://www.parentingposttrauma.co.uk/blog

 

Cath Hunter:

http://therapeuticfamilyinterventions.co.uk/blog/

 

Books I've found useful are "Inside I'm Hurting - Practical strategies for supporting children with attachment difficulties in schools" by Louise Michelle Bomber

It's relevant for children in the early years (I've attached a page from the book which gives an overview of how children can express the effects of insecure attachment)

 

I'd also recommend "Why Love Matters" by Sue Gerhardt which I think everyone working with children should read.

 

I've always been appalled by the lack of support for adoptive parents once their child is with them. They go through years of assessment then the child arrives and the support is really hard to access. I was involved in one heartbreaking case where the adoption broke down because the adoptive parents thought that once the child was with them, everything would be fine and of course it wasn't.

 

It sounds as if you've got a really good relationship with this parent and she obviously trusts you. Maybe she could recommend some books or organisations with information.

 

Good luck!

 

[Stargrower]

Thank you so much, that's really helpful.