Guest Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Hi to all of you, Having read through some of your posts looking for inspiration for our next topic of Nursery Rhymes I am now asking for your feedback about a sensitive issue; We are a small team of 7 staff, 1 being an admin role. Since the new year 1 member of the team has not come to planning meeting or given an apology, has not come to setting up morning before we came back in January, has put a picture of herself with a black eye on facebook with description, has said she is dreading coming in to work on facebook. She has only worked 3 days since the new year because when i discussed my issues with her, she got signed off with stress from the doctor after having a good long chat to another member of staff about me infront of the children saying i had disciplined her (which i hadn't). The thing is, the team is really happy, we have taken her key children into our groups and actually with a smaller team we seem to be stronger than ever. I have got an HR adviser, it's more the actual way to sort out what is actually going on... Any advice of what to do next, as in when she decides to come back, would be gratefully received
enuffsenuf Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Crikey I do feel for you what a pickle! I also work with a member of staff around whom meetings are arranged to suit.....who then never turns up and no apology. So I can sympathise. I cant offer much advice apart from suggesting that HR really need to get a grip on this because whilst at the moment you are a stronger team...it wont be long before other staff members feeling put upon by this behaviour etc. start to feel disatisfied and the team starts to "storm". Re the FB issue this is not acceptable. I do not know of any employer who would accept an employee bad mouthing them/or other staff on the open air. Personally, hard liner that I am if I hadnt already disciplined them...then I would certainly be doing so now. I would also take screen shots of the webchat in case there should be any comeback. I know that sounds dramatic but this person sounds a bit OTT. I hope you get it sorted and my own feelings are that a smaller team where everyone is doing their bit, sharing jobs and feeling wanted is better than a slightly larger team with a disrutpive element on the loose!
Guest Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Hi, thanks for your reply. To clarify, she bad mouthed me infront of the children at work not on facebook! There appears to be nothing i can discipline her for at the moment - HR is such a tricky issue. My team are absolutley fabulous, they want to do best by the children, it was them that told me about the facebook and badmouthing incident. They can't understand her behaviour. She is a mum and over 30!! Honestly, just sometimes i do wonder if it's worth all the hassle! Thanks for your sympathy
Inge Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Hi to all of you, Since the new year 1 member of the team has not come to planning meeting or given an apology, has not come to setting up morning before we came back in January, has put a picture of herself with a black eye on facebook with description, has said she is dreading coming in to work on facebook. Re the FB issue this is not acceptable. I do not know of any employer who would accept an employee bad mouthing them/or other staff on the open air. I do not read that she bad mouthed anyone in that, she had a black eye for whatever reason and was dreading work.. I would too if I had a black eye and had to explain it.. just that she said it publicly - what harm has this done to anyone other than herself.. anything could be happening in the background and it would ring alarm bells for me if this was not normal behaviour and HR need to be involved - if they are not already.. the one thing I would have issue with is the chatting with staff in front of the children relaying false information.. but then that could well be how she sees it.. not much you can do while she if off, but a back to work interview and chat to see how you can help her and get her back into the team with perhaps a few targets on how to achieve this on both sides.. at same time giving guidelines on correct behaviour in front of the children, and what is not acceptable..
enuffsenuf Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 Hi, thanks for your reply. To clarify, she bad mouthed me infront of the children at work not on facebook! There appears to be nothing i can discipline her for at the moment - HR is such a tricky issue. My team are absolutley fabulous, they want to do best by the children, it was them that told me about the facebook and badmouthing incident. They can't understand her behaviour. She is a mum and over 30!!Honestly, just sometimes i do wonder if it's worth all the hassle! Thanks for your sympathy sorry thats me reading things wrong.
Guest Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 sorry thats me reading things wrong. No apology necessary, i was really struggling to type it clearly whilst not giving confidential details! Sorry for the confusion, your comments were really helpful and comforting!
Guest Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 (edited) I do not read that she bad mouthed anyone in that, she had a black eye for whatever reason and was dreading work.. I would too if I had a black eye and had to explain it.. just that she said it publicly - what harm has this done to anyone other than herself.. Sorry, that's me not being clear - there was the black eye (to which i was hoping to give sympathy but wasn't told, she made an excuse and stayed off until it went down) the chatting infront of staff was after i talked to her, unrelated to the eye. anything could be happening in the background and it would ring alarm bells for me if this was not normal behaviour and HR need to be involved - if they are not already.. the one thing I would have issue with is the chatting with staff in front of the children relaying false information.. but then that could well be how she sees it.. I know roughly what's happening, despite asking if everything's ok she hasn't told me herself, i agree with you, i think she actually believes she has been disciplined, however as she was signed off sick the day after the incident talking about me infront of the children, i haven't had the chance to talk to her... not much you can do while she if off, but a back to work interview and chat to see how you can help her and get her back into the team with perhaps a few targets on how to achieve this on both sides.. at same time giving guidelines on correct behaviour in front of the children, and what is not acceptable.. Yes, i guess a back to work interview (again) is in order, however last time she get herself all upset and has been signed off since! I've already done the behaviour chat (much good it did). She obviously doesn't want to work here anymore, she seems to have an issue with authority. Ho hum, I'll wait and see i guess... Thanks for your feedback, food for thought Edited January 27, 2012 by Beau To sort out quotes!
Guest Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 Jeepers, sorry Inge, I was trying to be clever in my reply by doing it in bits but it's added them in to the quote - sorry
Beau Posted January 27, 2012 Posted January 27, 2012 Jeepers, sorry Inge, I was trying to be clever in my reply by doing it in bits but it's added them in to the quote - sorry All sorted
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