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Arrgghh! Tis the time of year when the children are tired and ready for the holidays. However, over the past week or so, I have been having problems with one of the girls in my class and her relationships with others. Although she is one of the oldest, she is not as mature as others or independent. She is disorganised (never remembers to put her glasses on each morning - although the rest of the children now remind her), doesn't quite have a special best friend and has had issues with other girls in the class last year in Reception and now in Year 1.

 

She is physical towards others - pushing or hitting them out of her way - and generally immature towards others - poking her tongue out at others, making faces, telling tales on them when they do something to her. She does seem to be singling one girl out in particular and this girl now doens't want to come into school - they have carpet spaces so are away from each other, in different groups and my TA and I have our eyes firmly fixed and observing. The hitting issue has been resolved by either sending her first or last when it has happened, but all the other things still seem to happen. I saw the other girl put her foot out to try and trip her up on the carpet! Both Mums have been to see me and I have explained what I have done and that we are observing. I do have wider concerns about the girl who is/has been the instigator/cause of the issues and am thinking of chatting to our SEN co-ordinator.

 

How can I sort this out? What can I do? How can I stop this from further developing? I'm tired too after getting all my reports done and all the other stuff that needs to be done and I can't think straight! Any ideas very gratefully received!

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Oh dear, poor you! I think you have 1 very unhappy child at the moment (or 2!) I do think that you need to have a zero tolerence towards the hitting and other nasty behaviours -what are the consequences if children do something unkind? missing playtime/golden time or whatever, for hitting, children at our school get sent to the headteacher and she wipes the floor with them (and consequently it rarely happens!) you also need to couple this with regular circle times/psche (daily if you need to!) praising other children for their kindness to each other/good teamwork and rewarding them. Would a star chart work? It's something I do occasionally and it does work for a short time to get the ball rolling and getting the child back on a positive footing again. I would also be finding time on a daily basis for you and the child to sit down and have a chat just the 2 of you, talking through why she behaving in this way and trying to work out a solution together-work on a behaviour plan with her together. Just think only 3 weeks left!

deb

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I wonder if the wider issues you are concerned about could be contributing to this girls social difficulties? Perhaps focussing on helping her to be more successful/less anxious or whatever else it is that she is struggling with would help her to cope with her emotions more effectively.

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