emmajess Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 My nearly-5-year-old has got to that stage of really loving jokes, enjoying being told them and making up her own (which are more hilarious by virtue of the fact that they aren't strictly funny!) Her favourites are: What did the grape say when the elephant sat on him? Nothing, just a little whine! What did the submarine say to the ship? I can see your bottom! What did the mummy tomato say to the baby tomato? Ketchup! Obviously these are beginning to wear a little thin so I wondered what your favourite simple jokes are? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 Ok I can't resist telling you my favourite, although my children (10, 13 and 15) would not be amused anymore!! What do you get if you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? It doesn't matter- he can't hear you! Told to me by a 4 year old - I wasn't expecting much after hearing the first line then I was roaring with laughter and so was the child! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 29, 2009 Share Posted August 29, 2009 Whats big, green and sits in the corner? INCREDIBLE SULK Couldnt resist adding this after my year 1 kids told me this ha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 My sons favourite which he has been telling for 2 years!! Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasnt 'peeling' very well!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 30, 2009 Share Posted August 30, 2009 Not necessarily funny more annoying Knock knock Who's there? Eggbut Eggbut who? Egg but no bacon! Sorry it just sticks as 1 little girl has been tellin me this forever! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sam2368 Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 What do you call a fly without legs? A walk. What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh 2 of my all time favs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MaryEMac Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 What do you call a woodpecker without a beak? A headbanger. The child who told me that is now a dad himself. Mary Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge? Foot prints in the butter. How does an elephant get down from a tree? Sits on a leaf and waits till Autumn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upsy Daisy Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 My six year old found this in a Horrid Henry joke book and has to tell it to everyone: Knock, knock, Who's there? Done up. Done up who? You've done a poo? When you are the 12 year old sister of said 6 year old it is soooooo embarrassing!!! (apparently ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HappyMaz Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 You've done a poo? Reminds me of two of my favourite jokes:- Why was Tigger playing in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh... What's brown and sticky? A stick! Maz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upsy Daisy Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 What's brown and sticky? A stick! I have heard that one dozens of times and it still makes me laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chocisgood Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 what about the dino ones! what do you call a one eyed dinosaurus? a 'do you think he saw us' what do you call a one eyed dinosaurus's dog? a 'do you think he saw us rex' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorna Posted September 18, 2009 Share Posted September 18, 2009 my classes favourite last year was What do you get if you dial 666? An upside down policeman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 18, 2009 Share Posted September 18, 2009 Lorna, off-topic I know (sorry!) but I'm amazed you've only 58 days until your fabulous three arrive Time has flown since you shared your good news - probably not for you I'm sure I'm not the only one who'd love to know how you are? Nona x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorna Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 I also can't belive I am now 32 weeks- which is average gestation for triplets- I am very uncomfortable but pleased I have lasted this long. I see the consultant this week so will hopefully know more then. Will keep you all informed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Upsy Daisy Posted September 20, 2009 Share Posted September 20, 2009 You've done well to get this far. Can you remember what your feet look like? Just think. In 3 or 4 years time you will have three sets of silly jokes to listen to every day for weeks on end and still be expected to laugh every time. I bet you can't wait either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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