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hi, im managing a holiday club at the moment, and have a 3 1/2 yr old boy who has moved to the setting from america! The nursery is attached to the school (which the club is also part of) and i spoke to the practitioner who knew him best in there before club started. She told me that the nursery had not been informed that the boy was still potty training. But that it explained why they were having toiletting issues - im sure you can imagine!


he comes to us for three days a week, for 6 hours each day. He does not wear pull ups.

on monday he used the loo twice, and changed him once( no2).


on wed didnt change him and he used the loo twice(only no1).


on fri he used the loo twice, and we changed him 4 times (all no2).


we are asking him every half hour whether he needs to go, and after a while asking him to try. he's quite defensive about going but goes quite readily before handwashing ie. at lunchtime.


im wondering if anyone has any great tips that they could share, as im not overly used to potty training.

Also, sometimes he desnt know that he has been, ill explain that we need to go and change and he doesnt understand untill he sees what he has done.


sorry for the long post! but any tips would be greatly appreciated!!


lucie x

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hhmm... just going through the information provided by parents for our new nursery intake in september and think that I could be in the same boat as lots are not yet trained at home and loads still in pull-ups. I know there has been discussions here in the forum about the subject- have you tried a search; also have you spoken to his parent/s to find out what the routine is at home and their expectations? let us know how you get on, best of luck

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We had a child who was 3 and a bit who had no idea on the potty front when he started with us at day nursery. Was turning into constant battle to keep taking him to loo, and then having to take him away from play to change him when he didnt have a clue why. He would get upset


In the end we left it a month or so then tried again for few days and kept trying till then when he was ready, he did it no probs like something just clicked.


If a child really dosnt have a clue and cant feel that they have been your losing a running battle keep askign them to go, as they really cant do it. Could you use pulls up for time being? Some children it does take longer dosnt mean their are never going get there!

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What happens at home? is often a question to ask first.


we had a child who constantly wet and soiled at the setting, on questioning parents he wore nappies when not with us and was finding it hard to work out when he was wearing them, hence regularly just wet or soiled when he felt like it. These days they leave a child so dry they often cannot tell when they are wet. (mum was using us to do all the toilet training and in the mean time confusing him)


We worked out a plan with parents to remove nappies totally for a week and work together on it. (I assume you do give all washing to mum and expect her to supply enough changes for the day.)


we find that asking if they want to go often doesn't work, irritates them and others and have found that often by regular times and telling to go works better. It may break the play but some children soon learn that if they want to stay playing then they need to use the toilet and not be constantly removed.


He is willing to do it at regular times before handwashing ie. at lunchtime. and has some control as he does use the loo, but may not have full control yet.


perhaps it may be worth looking at a plan where you send several children together at regular intervals for a time, hence learning what is expected from his peers and following others, this may not be easy to begin with but we have used it in the past and it helped with understanding and kept the changes to a minimum.


Accidents always happen at any age though, water play is the classic one..often wet when there as is when they are really engrossed in something or not wanting to let go of a toy to go, in the latter we will offer a 'look after service' where if they put it in a box before going out no one will remove it to play with it and they can have it back afterwards.


toilet training is not easy but you do need all parties doing the training to follow same or similar guidelines, so child does not become confused and learns what is expected of them



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hi, i spoke to mum on monday, she said that at home she bribes him to go and try with roses (yes the chocolates!) :o she said she would bring some in, but i really dont approve.


yes i do send dirty pants etc home,


i would love to leave it a couple of weeks, and actually he will go back to 'normal' nursery after the holidays. but id rather not have to keep changing him, as mum would prefer not to use pull ups!!


a colleague took him to the loo in monday also, and said that he seemed scared of it, so have invested in a seat that fits over our (small loos) seats to make them easier for him to sit on.


hope that helps!!!!


will let you know!



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  • 2 weeks later...

just to update....


we are now telling him to go once every hour,

and we have had 3 dry days now which is fantastic.


but then on monday.....mum comes in at the end of the session and says they are going on a long journey so she put him into a pull up!!!!!!!!! couldnt believe it, what a waste of time, talk about mixed messages.


lucie. x

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