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Frustration


deejay
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Further to my topic below. we have hit a wall with the little boy that we are worried about. According to mum the HV came out last week to vist them and said that she didn't think there was a problem with the child's speech she thought he was shy!!!

 

Now the last thing in the world is this little boy being shy, he comes to us for cuddles he screams to get his own way and he has known us for over a year.

 

We have a meeting with all agencies after half term and from our point of view we are going to say that we have voiced our concerns and when he gets to school and the same thing comes up again we have documented our concerns and they were not listened to. It is such a shame for this little boy.

 

He was sent in in pants the other day and his behaviour improved - we think because he was being treated like a big boy but the next day he came in again in a nappy we asked mum why and she said because he said he didn't want to wear pants he wanted to be a baby and she couldn't be bothered to argue with him. What chance has he got? If it was my child I wouldn't give them a choice he would be in his pants and that is it. Some parents are sooooo frustrating, they cannot see what they are doing to their child and that sometimes their behaviour is a product of how the adult behaves. what more can we do?

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Sorry, I haven't read previous post but I know just how you feel.

How old is this little chap?

You are right with documenting everything so at least you can show you had concerns. Do you have any links with HV or the school he will go to?

Rightly or wrongly (thinking of confidentiality) we do have subtle chats with both HV adn school when we feel we need to. Often you will find that they are not getting anywhere either but have same concerns.

Are there any older siblings? We have had cases before where the older childrne have been through the system and parents just can't face it. I'm sure you've tried everything but some strategies we've used with parents are:

We would really appreciate some support in how best to provide for X. We have tried everything we know and we don't seem to be having any success. That implies that you need the help and not the child!

Showing parent some form of records - we have 'stepping stones' that are underlined when achieved - and saying we would really expect a child of this age to have got to....

It's probably nothing but it can take such a long time to get any support and if you leave it until they go to school, they could really struggle. We could refer now and hopefully by the time they're seen, it will have sorted itself out. Better to be safe than sorry kind of attitude.

 

Best of luck I feel your pain :o

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