What A Morning

[Guest alisonjayne]

I have just had the worst morning ever. We have a child in our setting that we have to watch all the time, this morning when he came through the doors we knew we were in for one heck of a session, firstly the paint was tipped into he water tray, paintbrushes stuffed into waterpumps and water then tipped out of tray this was just the beginning. On the carpet he got an areoplane and shoved it into the face of the child next to him, when an adult intervened he pulled the hair of another child ripped the register, nipped and scratched adult and child and had to be removed from the carpet, as the adult did this he slapped her very hard in the face. We have been using lots of tactics to try and defuse situations and these often work, the adult tried using a piece of paper to draw a social story with the child and this seemed to calm him down,his pictures were very scratchy and lots of dark scribbles (you could see the rage in his work). This calmed the situation and he then joined the group and went into the home corner where he slapped one of our new children around the face and so was asked to come out, he went with the adult to the writing area where he proceeded to trash the area, he was taken into the office to give him time and space to calm down and he did the same to the office, and then kicked scratched and punched the adult. We ended up calling his mum who came and joined us for the rest of the session. We have our SENCO involved with this particular child but I am worried for the safety of the children and staff within the setting when he gets like this. I have read that some people would refuse to have them in the session if they acted in this way, but it wouldn't help the mum or the child concerned. I have read through the recent topics on behaviour issues and although they have been useful, I need some advice on how to tackle this problem.

 

Help

Ali

[Guest]

If the Senco is already involved... have they any advice? Can you get any funding for 1-1?

I think you have to ensure that whatever tactics are used are consistent among different staff members. Do you use time out at all? You said you took him to the office so I guess this is the same.

We haev a very excitable lad who hurts children by accident as he is so bouncy! It got to the point where his name was being yelled by the children all the time and a kind of self fulfilling prophecy situation - oh well I have a reputation for throwing toys so I might as well...

The way we dealt with him in the end was to stop focussing on HIM. We would say to the children...'he's only little and doesn't know not to push you/take toys/throw toys yet and we need to teach him.' Once they stopped yelling at him, he calmed and now if he takes something they ask for it back and he gives it no problem if they shout he gets excited and runs off with the toy!!

 

Hope this helps in some way. We had a child scream all session today and that was bad enough

[Beau]

Ali,

So sorry about your day. It really does sound like you need another adult to deal with him and you need them now! It is so difficult to find that all your careful planning goes out of the window because all your time is taken up dealing with one child with a particular behavioural problem. Is it possible for you to assign one person to be with him or are you stretched already?

 

It's really worth finding out what his interests are and exploiting them to the full to keep him out of mischief. Then praise, praise, praise whenever possible! Good luck.

[Guest]

Hi Alison,

I totally empathise with your situation and endorse what Pandamonium has said.

Has your observations shown any particular "triggers" to the behaviour? You say that when he came in you sensed his disposition.

How is he when Mum is at the setting?

 

There is never an overnight cure, as I am sure you know. Keep asking for SENCO and parent support. Try to diffuse any "label" which evokes expected behaviour. ( difficult, I know).

 

Have you looked at areas such as diet?

 

Sorry lots of questions and no miracle advice, but hopefully tomorrow you will see things in a different light.

The worry with others getting attacked is the negative "gossip" that tends to prevail. The other children and adults also need support in not just "dealing" with this child, but as Pandamonium says, they need support in helping this child to integrate with his teachers and peers, by promoting a positive, inclusive experience for him.

 

Good luck, let us know how you get on.

 

Peggy

[Guest]

Ali,

I sympathise, I am a TA for a boy (1:1) who has just started, and everyday is similar to your morning. Try to draw up a behaviour management programme with the assistance of the SENCO, try and ignore the bad stuff and concentate on the good. Some ideas to think about are:

Does he respond to praise, Are there any triggers, what does he enjoy doing, do any particular children seem to get the brunt of his agression, how often does it happen, can he talk about why he is angry, does he show any signs of frustration before things get bad, does he respond to time out in a calming area (cushions, soft music, dimmed lights etc)

This one can't be sorted out overnight but hopefully things will get better.

Good Luck

Jo

[Guest alisonjayne]

thanks for the replies

Pandemonium we are working with the Senco to try and get 1-1 support it just takes so long.

Time out seems to make him so angry you can see the anger in his eyes and this is often the time that he will go for the adults or children so we only use this as a last resort.

I sympathise with you after your morning of screaming hope today was better.

[Guest alisonjayne]

hi Beau

Thanks for the response

We have three members of staff in each session and we have 4 children that need a lot of adult attention for various reasons ( just one of those year groups I'm afraid) He is very creative so we have a lot of activities that where he can explore and experiment. He will happily sit at a self chosen activity for the whole session on his own or with an adult its group times, times when he is not engaged in a particular activity, story times, circle times are the trigger times for this type of behaviour. We have adjusted as much of the session to work around him, but I feel that the others are missing out on so much.

 

Ali

[Guest alisonjayne]

Hello Peggy thanks for the advice, we have been doing a lot of observations to look at triggers, see response to Beau, we try so hard to difuse situations before they get too out of hand but this morning we had an incident where he bit an 11 year old girl who had come into the Nursery ( we work a partner system within the School where the oldest children partner up with the youngest) this girl is not his partner and was standing talking to her partner and he bit her hand so hard that he brough blood to the surface he was not provoked in any way.

 

We have talked with mum and see his lunch box, he appears to have a very well balanced diet. Yesterday he had porridge for breakfast not sweetened with anything!!! Hate to imagine the situation if he had eaten cocoa pops!!!

 

He is often a very sweet little chap but you can see him beginning to lose control of himself, I took him off for a walk this morning as we could see a simialr situation occuring as it did yesterday.

 

I am so worried that he is getting labeled as the naughty boy I don't want that I just want to give him the support he so obviously needs, we have been setting targets with our area Senco and she is coming in next week to review and compile new one, I had a meeting with the Reception teacher this afternoon who is also the school Senco so hopefully help will be with us soon.

 

Thanks for all the answers you have given me

 

Hope tommorrow is a calm day

 

Ali

[Guest]

Hello Ali. How are you getting on?

 

I was reading over some of your triggers - circle time/story - would it be possible to withdraw the child at these times and do an individual story to at least get him used to the routine.

 

Another suggestion (although this might not be possible) is to work with him at home for a while. I had a similar situation with a child who had ADHD, and I used to go to his house for an hour after our session had ended to do some activities and get to know him better on an individual basis. In the environment of his own home we developed a lovely bond, and I was able to manage his behaviour in the setting much better. We used a lot of other tactics too, but this really turned things around in the beginning.

 

Good luck, and let us know how you are getting on

 

G.

 

X

[Guest alisonjayne]

Hi Goldilocks

we have in the past removed him from the group for register story time circle time.... he is now chosing to come and join in a lot of the time, but finds it difficult to sit still for long however because he has chosen to join us we are trying to make the activities short so that he can have a positive experience as possible.

 

I like the idea of home visiting but time would be a problem here. We have put in for additional support and we are just waiting to hear if we have been successful.

 

Ali