Child Alone

[Guest]

Help.

I have a girl in my reception class who is having difficulty making friends or communicating in the play ground.

Unfortunately the physical play ground is not child friendly with no activities laid out for the children to do. We are having a major play ground refurbishment soon. I have a very sociable group who play really well together but this particular child just sits on the bench watching. I have tried different tactics - putting the children into groups with specific games to play at play time, encouraging her to bring things to play with, asking her mother to organise play days at home, teaching them play ground games etc but nothing has worked. Recently she has begun to look unhappy in the play ground and has started to say that she hates school! I'm very unhappy sending her up to Y1 without having developed these skills but am at a loss to know what to do next.

Any suggestions?

[Guest]

Poor wee soul!

I presume she doesn't have any communicative/social/emotional problems. I would do exactly the same as you have already done. is she nasty/bossy to the other children?

 

Don't know if this is any use. I have a system where I have a Star of the week. My current star is a child who was the only one who did'nt get invited to a party (how awful is that) I basically make a big fuss of them, display their baby photographs etc, give them a bear to take home etc. They wear a big badge, lead the lines, hold doors, get to be first for everything, run 'errands', water the plants/ flowers/ garden. They get to choose different people to help them. It makes the children want to be around them to get the perks. It's probably too late in the year to introduce something like this.

 

Anyway, I'm at a loss otherwise! Good luck, let me know how you go. It's nice that she's got a teacher like you who cares!

 

Moo

xx

[Susan]

I cant imagine that you havent but have you talked to her parents? Does she have siblings or is she an only child.

Several of my "only"s have similar problems although not as marked as you describe.

[Guest]

Does this child have these problems in the classroom too?

[Guest]

My son used to be like this in his reception year. I was lucky he used to tell me exactly what was going on. The reason why he chose to be on his own is that the other children wanted him to be a robber in their games and he had very strong views (from me!) that robbers were not nice people, so bless him he decided it would be easier to play or sit on his own than pretend to be a horrible person.

 

He is now fine Y2, he has a few buddies but I do think some children do sometimes need time to reflect and I for one enjoy people watching.

 

If you have spoken to the parents and all is well, then there is not much more that can be done except ensure that everyone is being kind and appreciative of each other.

 

Good luck

[Beau]

My daughter (who is now 21) also hung back at break times when she was in Reception, preferring to sit on the wall eating her apple. I was quite worried about it and asked her why. She was quite indignant and said that for one thing she liked to eat sitting down and for another all the other girls in her class were too silly and she didn't like their games. Throughout her time at school she tended to make very good friends with one or two like minded people and stick with them, rather than feeling the need to be in a large group.

 

I think you really need to speak with the child and find out what they think before worrying yourself too much, as it may turn out to be something quite straightforward.