Advice Needed From An Experienced Teacher...

[Guest]

Hello,

 

Could anyone please give me some advice...

 

I have a boy in my reception class who since starting constantly does the wrong thing and doesn't listen and follow instructions. I am constantly telling him off... for example not coming to the carpet when the children are asked, hanging back when bringing children in from the playground, climbing on/over furniture... I could go on it is constant. Also the other children are constantly coming to me about his behaviour e.g. not leaving them alone. He generally doesn't know how to behave with his peers and seems to want to be silly to grap attention. At playtimes he chooses often to play with older children.

 

Background- parents work full time (till 6 ish) and he has been in a nursery setting since birth... he goes to after school clubs and is picked up by different people each day e.g. parent, grandparent, childminder or after school club.

 

I believe that he is seeking attention through his behaviour and that he is probably a very confused child. I feel he may be getting mixed messages for what is expected of him at school, after school club etc and also that he feels insecure.

 

ok so I have spoken to parents about his behaviour and mum and dad are coming to see me after school thurs. They are concerned too as behaviour at home has been poor, they want to know how they can help him. I have some ideas for how we can work together e.g. consistency in expectations but has anyone had any experience of a similar child and what strategies worked. I am trying to praise him when he has done something positive but also must make sure he follows the expectations.

 

THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ THIS. ANY IDEAS APPRECIATED

[Susan]

Hi Rachel

this does seem to be an insecurity problem in the first instance. Positive behaviour modification programmes, praising the positive and ignoring the negative and working with simple rewards both at home and school may work ie one small simple target to come in at playtime gets a star, 10 stars gets another reward etc.

Maybe you need a home school book with the day broken into small segments so that parents can praise him too ---when he has been good.

You can not ignore the negative behaviour if itendangers his safety or that of the group and you may need to get the other children on board, "we are going to help x to be good, we are going to ignore him when...." etc.

You will need to be firm and consistent and it may be hard work!

 

Keep a record of the tactics you are using and his responses as this will be evidence if he needs further support. You may need an ed psych report at some stage if things do not improve. Talk to your SENCo, there may be access to other behaviour support specialists, play therapy etc which could be beneficial.

 

When you talk to his parents, it could be a good idea to have someone else there to support you.

 

Good luck.

[Guest tinkerbell]

Good advice from susan

Sparklebox does a good star chart which can be done in school and sent home so mum and dad can re enforce what you are trying to do.

Praise as much as you can whenever you catch him and the children around him doing the good behaviour.

keep calm and treat each session as a new beginning.

I sometimes keeep my little 'monkey ' in for a couple of minutes doing a job,so he can avoid the crush and push in the corridor going out to play and lining up for lunch when I know he will kick or thump someone because they are in the way.

 

good luck

Tinkerbell

[Guest]

I have tried a diary to parents each day and they write about the child`s evening. The problem i had with 1 boy was his parents never picked him up so he thought they wouldn`t know how he had been . The diary meant he knew that i would tell mum things good or bad.

With another child he had a little tub with a lid on and had to collect 5 dinosaurs in then he was allowed some choosing time. Did it am and pm . You could start with 3. Gave them for sitting nicely, lining up etc.

[Guest]

With a similar sort of child, I had a ladder on the whiteboard with a figure (mine was a clown) which the child could move up the ladder each time he was showing appropriate behaviour. When the clown reached the top of the ladder, the child had an agreed reward.

[Guest]

Brilliant! Lots of great advice here... hmm just trying to get my head round what a home school diary might look like split for parts of the day... would it say morning, afternoon and evening? how have others done this???

 

Thank you so much everyone for taking the time to reply.

[Susan]

It could say morning, afternoon and evening but I would be tempted to split it into smaller parts at least at first. Think SMART, small, achievable, realistic etc.

 

So what does he find difficult, you could have morning til playtime/ assembly/playtime/ registration/ after play to lunch/ lunchtime/ afternoon/ storytime etc etc --divide to suit your timetable and routine.

 

Parents neednt necessarily feed back to you as such, that may be too much at the moment and be something to build towards but the diary goes home with him for them to say "well done, you were brilliant today". They should not put sanctions on him if things go wrong in school although they may not reward, if that makes sense?

 

Good luck.